XIII: Dreamless

The day is as bustling as ever, as the whole crew is shooting at the side. The site is a rundown building which is too shabby and gloomy. The assisting team is moving around sending refreshments to the artists who finished their scene. The shooting crew is still filming at the side, the scene is repeated for 10 times but the emotions is still not enough, making the whole crew complain.

"Aria, just show me natural emotions! You're so stiff! I can't feel your remorse..." the director shouted. The sun is up, and being on the rooftop is really hot.

Alina is standing at the side, watching the girl who is struggling with the scene. The girl is actually so timid. There is rumors that she is just backed up by some powerful person so she manages to get the role.

She secretly shook her head when the director kept shouting and criticizing the girl. 'She would never learn that way.'

"Let's take a break first... Everyone is tired." the director pinched the bridge of his nose. He is beginning to feel irritated. The rumor circulating might be true, if not, why would the newbie actress be so bad at this?

The movie they are shooting is titled "Dreamless". The girl named Zin Yi is a suicidal and introverted girl in her middle school. She has a distinctive gloomy aura around her and she has no desires to live. The character is played by Alina. She can easily portray the character as scripted because she is really depressed. Just put her struggles and loneliness in the shoot, then she is portraying real emotions which is hard to ignore.

The storyline is a repetitive scene of dreaming and dying in every dream, an unending loop where she only lives her fantasy to die. Every night she dreams, and the thing she desires the most happened in those dreams, dying. In reality she's suicidal and attempted to kill herself multiple times yet she always fail to die.

Zin is living in a cheap rundown apartment. Abandoned by her parents, she makes living by taking multiple jobs. The university's tuition fee is high so in order to study there, she took an  academic scholarship. Her relatives have no apparent concern about her and she doesn't care about them either. Unlike those TV dramas where the lead characters fight for what they have, like property and lheir love, she actually did otherwise. She let her greedy relatives get all the inheritance from her deceased parents.

The story of the girl is hopeless and film of gloom and remorse. It depicts the struggles of being a suicidal person and her strong desires to die.

Having no one... Why would anyone desire to live?

Alina saw the director talking to Aria, as the girl sobbed helplessly at the side, nodding her head all along. She reminded her of herself during his early period in acting. Pains, struggle... Disappointment. The whole crew is silent and sympathetic. Although they complain about retaking the scene, they still pity the girl, and retaking the scene when making a movie is rather pretty normal.

When the director finished talking to Aria, the shoot also began. Alina approached the dispirited girl. She also told the director to hold on and she will talk to her.

Aria bowed to her as respect. "You have trouble in shooting the scene?"

Aria can't help but to be in daze. How can such a gentle and sincere person survived the cruel and ruthless world of entertainment? She nodded her head in response as she fail to form words to say. Alina pulled her into a hug which made her frozen. Then her soft voice she heard beside her ear.

"Just imagine they are not here. Then try to think of the saddest things. Being an actress, focusing is vital. You have to focus to get in your role. Think of the disappointments. The criticism from other people saying that you don't deserve anything, their petty judgments which made you cry. Think of all of those. If you think of it... Being an actress is full of those toxic things right?" she said then pulled away from her. "Susu na!" she said then walked away.

The girl is fleeting when she came back to the shoot.

The shooting went smoothly after that, the whole crew is able to rest early.

Selena watching for afar smiled at her. "You have an appointed dinner to the director of Tao Trading. The son of the old man who sponsored this movie.

"Then let's go back the company first. I need to rest."

"Won't you eat?"

"I will. After I rest."

Going back to her company, she rested on her private room. Having rest is rare and every opportunity is golden.

She thought of him. 'He might not be as scary as I first thought.'

She's actually thinking of him.

"Is it really exhaustion? He's so pale. He works at the company, then he will still work in his study room after work. Doesn't he know rest?" she wondered as she lied on the spacious sofa facing the glass wall.

Rei is really an isolated book. Not just closed, isolated. He let his friends in, but he never let her.

'But I can't force him into things. If it don't work, then I can just slowly work it.'