A Change to my new life

Rosalia: "The other day me and Michael were......." Laughing and smiling at the table was my so called 'friend group' , or in reality just a group of people who share common traits and interests. This friend group consists of 10 people, although I barely interact with 5 of them. They are merely in this group because they have nowhere else to go. We are outcasts as they call us, outcasts who come together. But I would be lying if I said I didn't enjoy their company as all people do.

Rosalia :"So who's up for going to my place during school break?"

Michael: "Sure I'll go and Daniel here as well" Michael cheerfully and forcefully raised my hand up

"What when did I say..."

"Ok then that's settled who else?"

As usual I got cut off again, supposedly being the leader of this band of outcasts I guess you could call me the biggest outcast of them all, but I'm not.

Rosalia: "Alright let's go out for lunch since school's out."

As we stood up I caught a glimpse of Jasmine and her friends, I recognized most of them, a typical girls group not popular but not disliked, guess she's in the same boat but she's still doing 100x better than me

As we all strolled along the road following Rosalia's lead, man she really is such a strong force of optimism, it's almost too strong sometimes, but well I'm not one to complain since most people call my pessimism too strong as well.

Michael:"Ah! What do I do? She was really cute today!"

Rosalia: "Yes yes that's what you always say Michael" Rosalia jokingly exclaimed.

"It's like I said man," I interjected into the conversation.

Daniel:"You don't know anything about her, nor have you even engaged in any conversation with her, your chances are 0%, as usual."

??? :"I'm sorry I don't like you that way, you're a really nice guy honestly but let's just stay friends."

Daniel: "Oh. I see."

Trudging along the corridor as I looked down at the floor, I thought to myself: It's just a rejection, don't get so worked up.

Tears streamed down as I stood at the corner of the school toilet, trying to regain my composure.

Even today that image still plays in my mind, it's been 2 years since that rejection but I will probably never forget about it, it was my wake up call to the harsh reality of this world and the true nature of high school relationships. Call me salty or just butthurt but that hurt has allowed me to understand what people in school society truly are like. 90% of people in school are superficial, caring only about looks, that's why the gap between close friends and romantic relationships are so hard to break. Many girls love to be comforted and pampered by people who constantly tell them how much they are needed, but when you confess they instantly take a 180 degree turn.

Rosalia: "Still bitter about that rejection? It's been 2 years man come on, it's time to move on from the past, there are plenty more fish in the sea."

Daniel: "I'm not bitter, how many times have I said that. I'm just convinced that youth isn't the best time to get into a relationship, that's all."

"Yes yes got it boss." Rosalia starts laughing

Jun: "Well man, if you would just man up a little maybe you'd be in a better spot!" Jun exclaimed. He was another one of the outcasts in my group, but was one I hated interacting with and almost never did.

Rosalia: "Hey Jun knock it off!"

Jun: "Alright alright relax!"

This wasn't an abnormal occurence, Jun often commented on my rather passive nature, I didn't really bother defending myself after a while, there's no point talking to someone who doesn't see the error of his ways nor has any plans to change. Not like i need validation from him anyways.

At Rosalia's place, Daniel stood at the balcony, staring off into the sky, not really bothering about the boring gossip going on inside the living room.

Michael:"What you doing out here all by yourself, you look like such a loner, haha!" It was Michael who walked out onto the balcony.

Michael:"Here, your drink."

Daniel:"Thanks."

Michael:"So, what're you inner-monologing about this time?"

Daniel: "Nothing actually, I just was staring into space."

Michael: "Oh? That's rare. Daniel's actually just relaxing. Sometimes man you just gotta learn to relax and take it easy for a while, you're always so tense wondering who's your next enemy. Are you that paranoid?"

Daniel:"It's hard for you to understand but thanks for the consideration. You and Rosalia are probably the closest to understanding, like what? Maybe 40%."

Michael: "Ehh? Only 40%, that's sad. Well maybe after I get rejected you and I can be pessimistic brothers."

Daniel:"That's assuming you muster up courage to talk to her."

Michael:"Cruel as usual aren't you"

Michael went silent for a while and looked at the ground.

Michael:"When are you gonna release those huge walls around your heart?"

Daniel:"Did you say something?"

"Nah nothing! Come on, I heard there's some juicy news about someone."

"Alright alright." I sighed with a slightly relaxed smile as I walked into the living room.

That was an exhausting outing, I guess I'm really not an extrovert according to the internet. The park should be empty be now. Walking up the stairs Daniel smiled finally being at the place of comfort he loved.

Jasmine:" It seems you really aren't lying when you said that you come here everyday."

Daniel:"Oh it's Jasmine again?" (Since moving next door she practically comes here everyday now)

Jasmine:"You look exhausted, just run a marathon or something?"

Daniel:"Hah! Impossible look at me, I wouldn't last more than 10 minutes."

Jasmine:"Well I assume you had a lot of fun at friends place?"

Daniel:"Fun isn't exactly the right word to use in this situation but i guess you could say it was interesting though."

Jasmine:"I saw your group of friends and you didn't realise Rosalia was in your group of friends"

Daniel:"Well she's a handful to deal with so it's pretty surprising to me to."

(I'm surprised she can hold the same expression every conversation we have that icy cold stare, damn it's intimidating.)

Jasmine:''You look even more bothered than usual, got rejected by a girl or something?"

Daniel:"Like that would ever happen, haven't had a crush on one in 2 years."

She looked at me with a slightly shocked look opening her mouth slightly but immediately regaining composure.

Jasmine:"That's interesting, I never thought you would be the type who wasn't interested in girls. Are you actually.... into boys?"

Daniel:"ABSOLUTELY NOT!" I slammed the bench in a defensive manner. She gave a smug look (Damn, she got me again, what's up with her?)

Daniel:"It's not that I'm not interested in girls, I'm merely waiting, plus high school is probably the worst time ever to look for a romantic partner, emotions run wild and once the honeymoon period ends it's all over."

Jasmine:"Some girl must have really done something you won't ever forget."

Daniel:"WHA!?" I struggled to even get words out of my mouth as I stared at her unfazed and usual icy look as her eyes closed.

(Damn how did she read me like an open book again?! It's not like I care about Beth, she's nothing more than my wake up call to reality and the catalyst to understanding how the real world works.)

Jasmine:"Well I guess I'm correct then?"

Daniel:"Well you're about there I guess" giving the most embarrassed look on my face I braced myself and took a deep breath.....Hey.......? How were you able to read me like such an open book? I barely said a few lines and you already guessed what I was talking about."

Jasmine:''It's simple. I'm able to identify your weakness, although you're an uncommon type of guy, I have seen others like you but none as extreme as yours."

(Well being extreme is not a bad thing, The US took extreme measures to fight against Britain. I'm mainly just doing the same to fight my teenage hormones off) I argued with myself in my head

Daniel:"What about you?" She looked up with a stare, her icy cold glaze could pierce the walls around my heart in an instance.

Daniel:"Usually it goes without saying that those able to identify trauma are usually also the ones who have experienced trauma that's why most psychiatrists are former victims of trauma cases. So what kind of things did you go through to get where you're at now."

Jasmine:"You certainly aren't as unaware as I thought you were. Yes I have some experiences of my own but.......there's no value in bringing it up since I'm not telling you either way."

Daniel:"Fair enough, I won't pry into it any further I don't like to that anyways. It's getting kinda late I'm gonna head back first, see ya tomorrow."

Walking off with my bag I couldn't help but wonder what sort of things she went through to get where she is now, but I pushed all that curiosity down deep into myself. It wasn't my business to interfere anyways.