Sight.

Abaddon is exactly what its names mean: destruction, pain, and almost every word that you can connect with it. It's a place full of wonders, not in a way where Alice finds a different world in wonderland, Abaddon struck no wonder at all. Seasons never change in Abaddon, not even those who rule over it, repeated and out of order. A never-ending cycle of calling out a helper, defender, against the cruelty created among one another. It's pretty much how I live in my head with an alter place, happiness, love, and all. Just to escape from the world I've opened my eyes into, sometimes I even wish to change time and just not leave the warmth of a womb.

The little nut called me in that warm wet space never expected to live in a harsh never-ending place. Living in Abaddon is hard, especially if you're an Ava'. Life plays a joke on my Mother who had wished for Don in order for me to not live in this harsh world of chaos. There's nothing to dread on now, I'm an Ava whether I like it or not...and even if I try to avoid all the pain there's really nothing I can do about it. Pain in Abaddon is everywhere, there's no escaping, well except if you're a Don.

Don's had it all: Happiness, Love, Care, Money. They're literally the priority of life here in Abaddon, what can I say? It's a never-ending journey for us, with Don's ruling over the system, there's no choice but to just let life give us what we wish for. Maybe, like in a thousand more years? Kidding aside, Don isn't the only ones we fear. There's also the Lumos they're Don's in an article of much nicer clothing and stuff but that's not what we fear. It's their much harsher way of living and treating us Ava's. In short, they're merciless.

Slaying everyone who passes them, well, that if you did something. By something, what I mean is crossdressing as a Don or even trying to escape through the portal to Earth. As if one can still manage to pass them, they're all over the portals making it impossible to dream of having a much better life on Earth.

Lumos is the barricades created by the Don's to keep us Ava's in the silent pit hole they've made.

In fact, it's no surprise if you'll hear news all over the dead and dry land of Abaddon that there's an Ava who had been slain by the Lumos in all age. They see no child or Señor, if you try then you'll die.

Wonder if that's their mantra or something.

If that's what they keep in their messed up head then we're indeed at loss, those are powers and bloodshed we're up to. Even I who had the guts and dreams to change the system wouldn't dare to charge at them unarmed or unprepared. I still cherish life even if it's threatening and exhausting at some point, I rather choose to lose my sanity than to see my Mother losing hers upon losing me in the hands of ruthlessness.

“Miller, will it be a loss of value if you'll share your thoughts to us? ” the Don II who had been the most outrageous lecturer you'll ever meet in Don Astra, a social elite academy created for the Don's and only them.

Ava's in Abaddon lacks in their life, the triple P as we call them: Privilege, Power, Priority, and even if we try to chase after it there'll be no use. As I've said before, Abaddon is a place for both Ava's and Don's, but it doesn't mean we live in harmony and that we share the same life. We're all different, divided into two societies, one for those who hold the system and the other for those who the system had forgotten.

And yes, none were tripping. I am indeed in the Lion's den, day by day crossing the thin line of life. It's not that I never think about my future, but in the world, we live in... there's no such thing as future, for us, Ava's.

“Miller, did I not called for you? ” Don II croak out, making those who are watching laugh themselves off. If we're in a different place, he'll probably be out of the picture being eaten by worms as his body decomposed underneath us all. I don't wish him dead, but from his attitude and way of living, I will not be surprised if I'll hear gossips about him being killed on one of his Earth days.

He's definitely not the kind who you'll fall for, he's one of those you'll avoid. Not for his features but for his aura, despite his broad shoulders, his overly strong scent, his style in clothing.

Feel sorry for his bloodline.

“I've had heard you the first time, Don II. It's just that, I rather keep my thoughts to myself instead of hurting others and being in trouble. And isn't it you who had taught us to act tough and square despite being scolded or being threatened? Think you've forgotten about that, our beloved Don II. ” I say flatly, keeping still in my stand as I purposely lock an intense eye-level battle with him. It's not that I am not scared, I am. But in Abaddon, showing weakness means losing especially if you're a Don. I know I am not but still, I have to keep up with that reputation. Not only for the life I cherish but for those who I willingly volunteered to protect: family, memories.

“Those who dare step on your guts, should not be given a matter of another chance. But rather, give them the same taste of the medicine they've given you. ” it was yet another mantra I've kept by heart, it wasn't taught by any of the Don's by rank in Astra but rather by someone who had chosen sacrifice over life. I didn't swear to live through it, but life calls and it had given me a path where I'll choose what I want to stand for: and that is chasing the dreams of changing the system. It won't be easy, but still, even the tiniest bit of food can make a colony survive.

“Ahem. ” he huffs, clearly defeated--all of us in this cramped space for lecture knows that I was indeed right, it was him who taught us and it'll be such a dent in his part if he firebacks at me. All around us, Don's beneath the rank-like me, are staring and giggling. He had his own medicine, and it's more than enough to shut him off his ground.

“Go on, be on your way. We're going to listen to your rubbish, our beloved Don II. ” Blake snaps, before popping his gum blowing a cool scent in the cramped lecture space. He's everyone's favorite, Don's within the ranks praise him and those beneath fear him, I don't though. Even if I step on his guts, there's nothing to be scared about for me he's just a wimpy Don hiding in a tough facade to impress those who had expected him to be perfect. How am I saying all of that? Blake is a close companion, despite him being despised when I first stepped foot in Astra. Just some old thought of him thinking that'll I'll take his place, but that's all in the past now. Among every companion I've had in Astra-can be counted by hands, Blake is the person I trust the most. But that trust is still not enough for him to know what I'm all about and who I am, I may be a risk-taker but I won't risk my chance of living differently over a shakable trust.

“You'll have your day, Don Elite. ” Don II warned before he storms off to the front and continues his rubbish talks on why the Don's are stronger than the Ava's. The same old one, that all the Don within the rank never shut off about. No wonder Blake calls it rubbish, he won't be in trouble for it though. Despite having the II in rank, Don's with that title were still treated as equal to those beneath the rank, and Blake is a son of a well know Don IX-the third to the highest line in rankings, no one dares to be in his bad radar that excludes the part of him being everyone's favorite... that is his path that he had worked hard to be in.

“I'm excited for that day, I'll probably be higher than you when that comes. ” Blake pursue his provocation, which causes the Don II to tightly shut his lips in a very thin line-probably gritting his teeth. He knows that Blake could be higher than him in no time. No surprise there, everyone knows that being a ranked Don doesn't mean you've established a concrete tough path for yourself. Rankings can change, and it doesn't matter whether you've been listed over a very long time already. Time is worthless in Abaddon, the seek for greed and potential. If others favor you then your chance of stepping up to the next level is higher than those who patiently wait for their time. The system in Abaddon is ruthless, but it is a hundred times ruthless if you're an Ava.

“I always envy you for being like that. ” Blake discretely mutters, which I heard despite the discretion. How can I not? We're practically tied in a cramped seat for two. It's no surprise for me though, his words. For others it might be but not me, I know him well. Too well I must say, every little detail on his suffering. Being pushed over to exceed others make it hard for him to breathe and live. As he describes: living life from start to the end of the darkness, you'll have the dragon breathing fire on you.

“And I envy you, minus the dragon breath. ” I mutter back before we went on full giggly feat. Ignoring eyes from those who've been staring and ignoring the rubbish coming from the ranked Don who's probably keeping a desire of ending us both in his head. It has always been like this, and we're used to it.

-

Sweat pours down my neck as I take another step into the dry land of Abaddon on my way home. Nothing new about that, just like how the system in Abaddon is broken and old.

Home, it might be surprising that despite the harshness of Abaddon that word still exists. It does, for us, Ava's who had seen it all yet doesn't have it all. That's our only treasure, other than ourselves and it cannot be exchanged for anything else. One thing I love about being an Ava is having the word Home marked in my heart because despite the power the Don's have we tend to think that they lack in the category of having a home. They might have high houses, but they cannot call it home. How can I say that? Because, out of every companion I've had as a Don none knew the meaning of home, especially Blake.

It's like life-giving us, Ava's, something that we can celebrate for, something that we can cherish. Some wonder, what about those who had sacrificed don't they have a home despite being an Ava? They do. Just sometimes to protect the home you've cherished, you'll need to sacrifice one thing for the other.

“Excuse me, I-uh... IknowIdon'thavetherightstostandbeforeyoubutifyoucanpleasecheckoutourdisplayswehavethingsforDon'stoo! ” third-voice rambles, in which I don't understand except their word of excuse. Their ramble causes me to halt though, who wouldn't be? They're practically standing in my way as If I had the right to shove them off.

“I'm sorry but I don't understand a thing you've said, well, except the first one. ” I utter, touching my nape in nervousness.

How ironic, I get nervous in front of someone whose words cannot be understood when in fact, I stood up and day by day mingle with the people who can end up both my dreams and live in a single snap of words on me being an Ava.

My words might have struck something in them, as they step back before standing at an eye-level rather than bowing to me.

An Ava.

“Are you okay? ” I ask, concern that she might run off as she looks like she's scared of me. What's there to be scared about? I'm not someone you should fear, it's life.

G'neration;