All That Matters

I heard someone call my name. I don't know where I was. I couldn't remember where I had been. All I felt was exhausted. I just wanted to stop and sleep for days. Finally relax for the rest of my life. No more fighting. No more wounds. No more sleepless nights as I wondered what next was coming to kill me. What I knew is that if Serana had survived, and had taken the bow, then she would be successful and defeat her father. She didn't need me alongside her. She was strong. Courageous. Smart. And beautiful. She didn't really need me at all.

I heard my name again. I was tempted to tell whoever was calling my name to go away. The voice, though, was familiar. Then I found myself waking up and the pain… The pain was near unbearable. I could barely breathe. I tried to move and managed to free my arms. Groaning and grunting, I managed to adjust whatever was lying on top of me. Then I yelled for her.

"Ragnar?"

"I'm here!"

I'm not sure how muffled my voice might have been. There was only darkness where I hoped I would soon see the light. I continued to struggle against whatever was on top of me. I yelled through my exertions and whatever was lying on top of me came away, blinking at the sudden light as I saw Serana standing over me. She was top of me in a minute, showing nothing but concern.

"Are you okay?" I nodded. "Are you sure? Anything broken?"

I couldn't help but laugh. Before we shared how we felt, she would have been concerned but… it would have been different. I think she was on the verge of covering me in kisses by the sheer fact I was still alive.

Then I coughed and nearly sneezed at the dust surrounding us. "Can you help me up out of this mess?"

She offered her hand and pulled me up. I chanced a look back and immediately wondered how I had survived at all. I felt two arms wrap around me. "Don't ever do that to me again," she said, her voice muffled by my chest.

"Do what? Save your life again?"

She looked up at me. "You said you couldn't bear the thought if… Well, neither can I!"

"I'm not going anywhere. Trust me. Too much to live for nowadays."

She kissed me again and nodded. "Good. Come on, I saw him escape behind his throne. I think it leads to the balcony we saw earlier."

I spent a moment looking for my sword, finding it buried under even more masonry. I spent another few seconds wiping all the dust from my armour, frankly still amazed I was alive at all. I'd had a lot of close calls in my life, battling against bandits, mercenaries, monsters and dragons. Being killed by a ceiling dropping on my head would have been rather a ignominious ending for the Last Dragonborn.

We found Vyrthur on the balcony behind what appeared to be another wayshrine. The arrogance and self-confidence he had shown only five minutes earlier had disappeared. He near cowered away from us as Serana and I walked towards him. I noticed the eyes flicked towards my sword, still bloodied from all the Falmer, and he took another step back. I wanted to cut him down without another word.

"Give us the bow!" Serana demanded. Fairly reasonable, in my mind.

The last bit of confidence appeared as he stood tall and simply sneered at both of us. "How dare you. I was the Arch-Curate of Auri-El, girl. I had the ears of a God!"

Serana simply waved her hand in the air, a mocking gesture. "Until the 'Betrayed' corrupted you. Yes, yes. We've heard this sad story."

He laughed. The bastard actually laughed! "Gelebor and his kind are easily manipulated fools. Look into my eyes, Serana. You tell me what I am."

I looked as well and we shared a glance. Her surprise matched mine. Mostly because I hadn't been close enough to see his eyes. I'm surprised she hadn't picked up on it, though. "You're a vampire?" she asked quietly, "But… But Auriel should have protected you…"

Now he got angry and I thought he was about to attack. Instead he paced in front of us, gesticulating wildly. "The moment I was infected by one of my own Initiates, Auri-El turned his back on me. I swore I'd have my revenge, no matter what the cost."

Now I laughed. "Hang on a minute there. Are you saying that you wanted to have you revenge on, of all things, a God? Are you mad?"

"Auri-El himself may have been beyond my reach, but his influence on our world wasn't. All I needed was the blood of a vampire and his own weapon, Auriel's Bow."

"The blood of a vampire. Auriel's Bow. It was you? You bastard! You created that prophecy? You're the one responsible for destroying my family!"

He stepped forward menacingly, surprising considering he was outnumbered and I was very prepared to kill him. "A prophecy that lacked a single, final ingredient. The blood of a pure vampire. The blood of a Daughter of Coldharbour."

She looked at me and gestured. I was surprised she would let me make the killing blow. "You were waiting all this time for someone with my blood to come along. Well, too bad for you. I intend on keeping it." I stepped forward and, before he could respond, I put my sword through his side, hearing him scream out as my steel punctured through his armour then skin. Serana took out a dagger and drove it straight into his chest. "Let's see if your blood has any power to it!" she spat, making sure she twisted the dagger before withdrawing it. I withdrew my sword and watched Vyrthur drop to the ground on his knees, trying to stop the blood flowing from his wounds.

"All this time, and to die like this…"

"If you were a Nord, I'd have taken your bloody head for good measure. But you don't deserve the respect nor the glories that would come with a place such as Sovngarde."

"Just know that there is now only one of your race left. Your brother."

He looked at me before turning his attention towards Serana. I was expecting one last mocking statement. Instead, he simply fell back on the ground and died. She then turned towards me and we embraced and shared another kiss, eventually leaning back and stroking my cheek again. "Thank you for being here, Ragnar."

She knew that she'd never have to thank me though I appreciated the sentiment. Our hug was then interrupted by the wayshrine near us opening. We turned to see Gelebor appear, climbing the steps towards us. He looked at us before glancing past to see the body of his brother. Despite everything, he obviously couldn't resist the sigh.

"So, the deed has been done. The restoration of this wayshrine means that Vyrthur must be dead and the Betrayed no longer have control over him."

"The Betrayed were not to blame for what happened to your brother," I explained.

"What do you mean?"

"Your brother was a vampire," Serana continued, "He controlled them. He was responsible for everything, including the prophecy which destroyed my family."

"So this was personal?"

"It was before. Knowing he created the prophecy… He was never going to live."

"I will admit; it brings me joy that the Betrayed weren't to blame for what happened here."

"Why do you say that?" I asked. Serana appeared very interested in his response.

"Because that means there's still hope that they might one-day shed their hatred and learn to believe in Auri-El once again. It's been a long time since I felt that way and it's been long overdue. My thanks, to both of you."

"You're welcome."

"What about the bow?" Serana asked.

"Ah, of course. One moment." Gelebor summoned magic and a shaft of light appeared in the middle of us. It was near blinding, causing me to look away. When I looked back, blinking rapidly, a bow sat suspended in the air. "Auriel's Bow," Gelebor stated quietly but reverently, "May it bring you success in your quest."

"Would you like to come back with us, at least to civilisation? I'm sure there are many of your fellow mer who would like to meet you. The last of your kind," I offered.

"Even with Vyrthur gone and the Inner Sanctum destroyed, my duty as a Knight-Paladin of Auri-El remains. I've been sworn to protect this vale and everything it represents until I die."

"Are you sure?" I asked. I still felt sorrow for this last of the Snow Elves.

"I thank you for your kindness but I must stay here. Even after all these years, I still believe it's possible that there are some other isolated conclaves of Snow Elves nestled elsewhere on Nirn. I'll also assume Vyrthur didn't exactly give you the option to stay your hand. So, for the time being, I will remain here and keep the Sanctum free of the Betrayed."

I offered my hand, which he readily accepted. "Good luck to you."

"And to you, Dragonborn," he stated with a slight grin. I just nodded, accepting that he would have known.

He then shook hands with Serana. "And good luck to you. You will face some difficult decisions in the next few days. Have courage to see this through to the end and you will prevail."

"I will."

Gelebor provided us with instructions back to Darkfall Cave and our horses, long since abandoned. It barely took any time to get back as he informed us of numerous short-cuts so we were back and mounted in no time at all. We headed back to the main road and, from there, took our time, agreeing that we should stop at Whiterun before making our way back to Fort Dawnguard. As we rode along, Serana took out the bow and looked at it admiringly.

"It's not as shiny as I was expecting. Still, it's beautiful. Unlike any bow I've seen before."

"It's time, isn't it?" I asked for her, not for me. Harkon was still her father. My parents were dead. I'd only met my father after he had died. I had watched my mother die many years ago. Both her parents still lived, yet she was estranged from both. While I still felt love existed between her and her mother, I don't believe it existed with her father. But Harkon was still her father and, as the old saying goes, blood is thicker than water.

She kicked her horse closer and grabbed my hand. "It's time, Ragnar," she said softly, "I don't think we have much of a choice."

"You know you'll always have my support, no matter what."

She smiled. It was a sad smile; one I had only seen once or twice. "I love you."

Those three little words made me smile, still giddy at the simple fact she felt the same way. I just squeezed her hand. "Ditto."

It wasn't too late by the time we arrived back in Whiterun. We probably should have headed straight to Breezehome and gone to bed, 'not for that reason', but we both appeared still rather wired by events so I suggested we head to Jorrvaskr to catch up. I honestly couldn't remember the last time I'd actually seen the Companions and, when I thought about it, missed their continuous presence in my life.

It was warm inside the guild-hall and there was a loud roar of approval as I walked through the door, hand in hand with Serana. It was an absent-minded thing that neither Serana or I took any notice of. Soon she was in deep conversation at one end of the table while I was soon in quiet conversation with Aela over a quiet tankard of mead.

"Something's different about you two."

"I don't know what you mean," covering my smile by taking a drink.

She laughed. "Come now, Ragnar. What's changed?" She looked me up and down then actually sniffed. She tried to feign shock though she failed miserably. "You slept with her!"

I could feel my cheeks heat up as she continued to laugh at my expense. "More than once," I admitted, unable to hide the smile that formed as numerous memories, all of them pleasurable, flooded my mind.

"There's something else, though…" She was quiet again for a few moments. Then she grinned. "You told her, didn't you?"

"Is it that obvious?"

"You're quite easy to read, Ragnar, despite what you think. There is no doubt that the lady over there, currently talking to the twins, is completely and utterly loved up and in love with you. The way she continues to glance over the table at you, the sparkle of her eyes in the fire, the way she leaned towards you and general body language as you entered the hall, the tone of voice she uses when talking to or about you. Add to that her natural… um… Listen, I can just tell, okay…"

"Yes, I told her."

"So what happens next?"

"We're heading back to Fort Dawnguard. We'll need to gather the troops as I have little doubt her father, Harkon, will be expecting an attack."

"I wasn't talking about that. I mean your future together? Considering she's… you know…"

I shrugged. "That is up to her. I'll tell you one thing, though. She thinks of this place as home already."

"Is a cure possible?"

I shrugged again. "I don't know but… I think she's considering it."

"Power of love eh?"

I chuckled. "Something like that. It's her choice to make. If she wants to remain a vampire, then so be it."

"Would you like her to be cured?"

"There's only one reason why I would."

"And that would be?"

"So we can grow old together," I stated quietly.

She smiled at the thought. "You're a hopeless romantic. I never would have thought, Ragnar of Whiterun." I gave her a looked which caused her to laugh. "Come now, Ragnar. I've been on the receiving end of your charms."

"Charms?"

She gave me a look. "You know exactly what I mean."

I filled up our tankards with more drink, listening to the laughter and conversation taking place around the room. Serana kept looking across the room at me. Every time she did, a little smile crossed her face. Aela eventually just dug her elbow into my ribs. "Told you so."

"How are things here?" I asked, finally diverting the topic away from my personal life.

"We received a letter from the Jarl's steward of Solitude, asking for our help. Apparently he spoke to you and you directed him to us. What were you doing there?"

"Something to do with vampires. Will you take the contract?"

"Of course! We've also received other requests of help from other Jarls. Markarth. Winterhold. Morthal. You've been a busy man establishing a number of contact, so it seems. It appears word of the Companions has well and truly spread across Skyrim."

"I don't even want to count the number of times I've crossed back and forth across this land, fighting either dragons or vampires at the same time. But, during that time, I've had a chance to spread the word."

"Will you return here once your current mission is over?"

"Of course. I have a guild to run, after all. Would be nice to take a simple contract in the morning and return home by the evening for once."

"We'll have plenty of work for you on your return, Harbinger."

"Ragnar."

She smirked. "I know."

Serana and I departed Jorrvaskr later in the evening. I made sure not to imbibe too much alcohol while I was never sure if Serana was actually effected by the stuff or not. I don't think she drank too much anyway. Once back at Breezehome, we headed straight to bed, knowing we had long days ahead of us. Unlike before, there was no awkwardness as we reached the top of the stairs as Serana simply followed me into what could only be considered our bedroom.

Breaking our fast downstairs the next morning, we were interrupted by a knock at the door. We shared a glance and, while neither of us were concerned, we were left to wonder who it could be. I did attach my sheathed dagger to the belt holding my robe in place, carefully opening the door, breathing a sigh of relief to find only a courier waiting for me.

"Ragnar of Whiterun?" I nodded. "I have a letter for you."

"Who's it from?" Serana asked as I sat down.

"Lydia."

"Lydia is writing you letters? Why?"

"Haven't I said anything?"

"I think you mentioned she was in Cyrodil. Not a lot more, to be honest."

"Oh… I thought I had. My apologies." So I explained what she was up to. Once I'd finished, I simply added "She's letting me know that she should be back in Whiterun by the end of this month." I noticed she suddenly looked concerned. "What's wrong?"

"How will she react to my presence here?"

"She knows all about you. Trust me."

Eyebrows were raised, clearly in surprise. "She does? How?"

"Well, I was always of the opinion that Lydia had feelings for me. But once I'd met you, I knew I wanted no other. And, not wanting my friendship with Lydia to be too awkward, I simply sat down with her and discussed our relationship. I'll admit to being relieved that, although she admitted to having feelings at one time, by the time we finally discussed the issue, she had moved on."

"So if she were to come back and find me here?"

"I don't think there will be a problem. The only thing is that this little house may suddenly feel a little crowded with three people here."

She smirked. "You may need a bigger house."

"I'll think about it."

Unsure how long we may be gone, we made sure to pack plenty of provisions and any other necessities, our horses somewhat loaded down with weight before we mounted up, knowing it would likely take all day to get to Fort Dawnguard. Serana continued to carry the bow. We had already discussed who would use it and agreed her skill with a bow far exceeded mine. In addition, there was discussion about what we would do when facing down her father. Fighting through the castle was already a given. No doubt we'd have to cut down many people she knew before even contemplating having to face her father. That is why we needed Isran and the rest. Otherwise, I think we would have just headed straight to the castle.

It was nearing sunset when the fort came into view. Those outside training crowded around us when our horses crested the rise, asking what had happened, if our mission had been successful, did we have the bow, what we were going to do next. We waved away their questions for now, stating we needed to see Isran but they were welcome to follow us. To say they took me up on the offer was an understatement, barely letting Serana and I dismount from our horses, Serana grabbing the bow before we entered the fort.

Isran must have heard the racket outside and was waiting for us. While he wasn't surprised to see either of us, even his jaw dropped upon seeing the bow. "You have found it," he stated quietly. It was the first time I'd ever heard his tone change at all. "May I touch it?"

Serana offered the bow. "Of course."

To say he handled it with near reverence was an understatement. "It's beautiful. I've never seen anything like it before."

"With this weapon in our hands, we will ensure the prophecy can never been fulfilled," Serana stated.

"It's time to make our move, Isran. No more delays," I added.

He kept a hand on the bow as he cast an eye over Serana. "Indeed. The day hasn't been won while Harkon still walks Tamriel. But what of Serana? Can she be trusted to lift a blade against her own kind? Her own family?"

I looked at Serana and she simply grinned. "Isran, you've just answered your own question."

Isran looked utterly confused. "I have?"

"You just called me Serana. You've never referred to me by name. You referred to me as 'she', not 'it'. To you, I must now be someone, not something. You may not trust me completely, and even after all this I will not hold that against you, but I can assume I have your respect at the very least."

Isran considered her words before he nodded. "You're right. You do have my respect for everything you have done for the Dawnguard. And, after everything you and the Dragonborn have done for us, I believe it is only right that you should have the bow to face your father."

"Thank you."

"Give me a moment while I speak to the rest."

I listened in and must admit that Isran gave a rather stirring speech, fuelling the adrenaline of the troops as he called them to action. Was it inspiring? To them, it probably was. He invoked the spirit of the Gods. He told them it was time to end the vampire tyranny and end their corruption of our world. I wondered what Serana thought of the speech but she simply folded her arms and said nothing, keeping her face blank. To me, it spoke volumes but I know she would have understood the sentiment.

"We'll leave tomorrow morning, Dragonborn," he stated once he completed his speech.

We ate dinner with the rest of the Dawnguard before we made final preparations regarding our departure the next morning. They had been busy while Serana and I had been away. The troops would be fighting in some of the best armour I'd seen, armed to the teeth with weaponry that would cut down the hardiest of foes. I wondered if Serana wanted to protect herself with some armour, but although I offered, she kindly turned it down, stating she felt more comfortable in her robes, adding that I was armed and armoured and could therefore protect her. She wasn't wrong.

As the rest of the Dawnguard headed to bed, we searched the fort for a room with a little bit of privacy. No-one, not even Isran, would have had a clue about the change in nature of our relationship and we certainly didn't want to let them know right now. We eventually found a secluded corner, a room that had been abandoned for a long time. We unwrapped our bedrolls, laying them down on the ground, before we lay down together, our clothes otherwise heaped on the ground as we covered ourselves in furs.

"What are our chances, Ragnar? Will we kill him?"

"Yes. Absolutely."

"I'm glad you're confident."

"You're not?"

"With you, I always am." She touched my cheek and turned my face to look at her. "Just one thing."

"Sure."

"Don't be stupid and think dying for me is some noble idea. We must defeat my father but you don't need to die to do it. I have a long life ahead of me and don't want to go through it alone."

I kissed her. "I'm not going anywhere."

Despite the reassurances to one another, we still made love as if it might be the final time. I'm fairly sure, despite where we were in a quiet corner of the fort, that they would have heard the noises but no-one came to investigate. Or, if they did, looked into the room, found Serana naked in some sort of position with me and quickly departed. We both chuckled as I suggested that may have happened. We lay back once our appetites for one another had diminished to the point where we simply lay together, her fingers trailing up and down my chest, tracing the numerous scars that lined my body. Eventually her hand came to rest over my heart and I knew she was asleep.

I'll admit I found sleep wouldn't take me. Not because Serana was lying naked next to me, although that was always a reason not to go to sleep, but despite the confidence I exuded, deep in the back of my mind, I did worry. Not about myself, but about her. Knowing she was having to face down her father. I trusted her more than anything. But I knew there would be a kernel, just the small part of her mind, which would hope that somehow this could be resolved peacefully. I knew it wasn't possible. I actually hoped he wouldn't find reason and simply left us no option but to kill him. All I could do was support her no matter what, no matter the cost. She was right, too, that I didn't want to die, and I'd do everything I could do to ensure she lived too. We were going to walk out of that castle, hand in hand, very much alive and get on with the rest of our lives.

I kissed her forehead as I felt sleep nearly take me and told her that I loved her. To me, in the end, that was all that mattered.