5 - A RESCUE

The motherhood desire made part of Márcia since early when she got her first dolly from her parents. She didn't know why that desire of being a mom existed, but she was quite sure that's what she was born to do it.

But life did not seem to agree, and she and her husband had failed in countless attempts.

Her uterus was weak, and couldn't stand more than three months of gestation.

She already had lost other babies and always in the same period — three months.

Márcia cried hidden among the house's corridors. Sometimes, the sadness was so big that she had to lock herself in the bathroom, with the shower open, to muffle the sound of sobs. Her husband hated when she cried. He had no pretension of being a father, and she knew that he thanked God that his wife could not give birth to a child.

For some time now, she decided she would give up the idea of having a child of her blood. The doctors said it was impossible that she could never, but she still wanted to be a mother, and adoption started to be a part of her daily thoughts.

But Bruno disagreed. He didn't want to be a father, and was caught by surprise about his wife's new idea.

—I'm not bringing to my house someone who isn't from my blood. You better forget it.

—But, I want to be a mother. I need it.

—You need to wash the dishes that are dirty since yesterday in the sink.

Marcia turned back her face, and went to the bathroom. She didn't go far with the discussions, and each day, she thought about doing that herself. Ask for the divorce, divide things, and raise her child in the best possible way.

There are many abandoned children out there. She didn't understand how a human being was capable of doing something like that, but who knows God did not want her to be a biological mother for that reason? To help and support those who have been left behind. To show them that life could still be good, and that not everybody was that evil.

She was the CEO of a technology company in a nearby town. Her salary was awesome, and she did not need her husband for that.

Did she still love him? She thought so. But the desire to be a mother was greater than any love. And if the price for that was to abandon the life at home, so be it.

When the blizzard came, she was sitting in the armchair's living room, reading one of her books about motherhood. She was more prepared than any other mother anywhere in the world could ever be. She read so much about motherhood that sometimes, she felt like she already had a baby, even though it was only the result of her imagination. She had been talking to herself for days as if she was talking to some child. Some of these times, she even believed she was getting mentally ill in reason of how much she craved for it.

That night's book was a scrapbook she'd set up herself, full of clippings from magazines and books, with children and their parents forming a family. It was her dream album. The album that she wanted to be a reality.

She hasn't gone out to see the snow. Her husband was outside, and sometimes called for her to enjoy the unprecedented phenomenon that was happening in Black Lake. But she didn't answer him.

He came in after a few minutes outside, warning that the snow had become more intense and the wind was colder and almost unbearable, but she paid no attention. Her eyes stared at the smiling children in the photos.

But a weeping took her out of her trance. It was a child's cry. Her heart pounded from inside her chest. What if a child were lost in the snow? Lost from their parents and on their own.

—Did you hear that cry?

—No, I didn't. Do you imagine things again?

Márcia didn't answer.

She was sitting, listening to the sounds that were coming from outside. And the cry echoed once more.

—I'm sure a kid is crying. Lost outside.

—Stop it! You will go crazy with this fixation for child and motherhood.

—Shut up, Bruno

The man froze. She never talked to him like that even when he treated her harshly and thickly.

She got up from the sofa, and curled up on her blanket, opened the door, and walked through the white that was all that blizzard outside.

The husband stood still, perplexed by his wife.

***

Márcia couldn't see anything. Her eyes could only see the white color and no form. She didn't even know her way home. She was lost in the middle of the blizzard (even a few feet from the house's door), but she wasn't afraid. Her maternal nature screamed louder.

—Has anybody there?

No answer. She stood still, waiting for that crying sound again.

And it came.

She followed the sound.

—Keep talking so I can reach you. I can't see anything, but I can follow the noise.

And the child answered. She continued crying until Marcia found her.

***

She was outside the woman's house, and could feel her longing. She wanted a son. She needed to share her love with a child, and it made her sad (and took her by surprise). She thought she had been drawn there by the evil, but it was the opposite. Was finding the good also a part of her nature? Now she thought so.

She forced a son to test the woman.

And by her surprise, she came in search of the lost child. Hers.

Heard the words so she could keep crying. And so she did. She needed to understand more about that new feeling. She felt that she had only experienced a part of love toward his children, but that one was different. It was stronger and more intense.

And then the woman came. She lowered down and hugged her.

***

—What are you doing here, child? And only wearing a dress. You'll get pneumonia like that.

Márcia hugged her, and then took her in her lap. She didn't know where her house was, but by a miracle (or the girl's help, she would think later), founded the door still open.

Bruno was sitting on the couch watching TV as if his wife hadn't gotten into the middle of the storm. Not caring that she could die frozen, lost without being able to return to the warmth of home.

When she got in, the remote control slipped off his hand.

—What the fuck Márcia? Who is this girl?

—It was her crying; you're heartless. I told you I heard a child's cry.

—Márcia put this girl out right now. I don't want trouble with the police thinking we kidnapped someone's child.

—Are you crazy, Bruno? Do you think she's an animal to be left outside in this storm? Look at her. She would die frozen outside.

—That's her parents' problem, not ours. Get her out now.

—Shut up and watch TV.

—As soon as this blizzard passes, I'll call the sheriff, and tell him I've found a lost child.

—Márcia, don't dare me.

—Other than what? Are you going to start hitting me now?

Bruno didn't say a word. He stared with flaming eyes at his wife, trying to impose some fear, until he gave up.

—Whatever. But there's no fucking way I'll get closer to it. It's your responsibility

The woman climbed the stairs with the girl still in her arms. She would give her a hot bath, and then look for something warmer for her to wear.

Thoughts crossed her mind as her feet moved towards the bathroom. How did she let herself marry with such an insensible and heartless man like that? Who treated a helpless child like an animal? And even an animal shouldn't be abandoned outside a warm home on a night like that.

Now, her heart was filled with hate and love.

And the girl was feeling that. But it was good hate — a hatred that did not force her to take the woman with her. She was discovering more about love, and now, she understood that hatred and love sometimes walked together. Sometimes, they complement each other.

During the bath, she wouldn't stop staring at the woman, trying to understand all that. This discovery would slow down her plans if she hadn't an ace up in her sleeves.

While the woman was taking care of the girl, the city went mad, snow was no longer the danger. The locals were.