Chapter 203: Part 6

Ivan

The grief never left me for long. It occasionally faded into the background for short periods, but then it roared back with overpowering eagerness. Holding myself together hadn't become easier. My animal side scratched with deadly sharp nails into the door holding my human side sane. Killing enemy cats helped. Now that the beastkind war was over, I no longer had cat flesh to sink my fangs into. It wasn't a good thing.

Just let go, I'd thought far too often. I could shift for the last time and run into the swamps to live out my days as a wolf. No vampire to prolong my life, hazy memories that might fade the longer I stayed in beast form. No accusing eyes.