Chapter 14

Katherine quickly turned away and found a robe and shrugged it on. Tying the knot firmly in place, she asked, "When do you leave?" She hoped she could pass off a nonchalance she knew wasn't in her character. She tried to leave the note of desperation out, like she wouldn't miss him every hour that he was gone.

Derrick failed to meet her gaze. "The day after tomorrow," she said.

Katherine's heart plummeted into the carpet. "The day...?" She refused to acknowledge the way her nose started to burn and how her heart raced. Do not turn around, do not turn around...

"I see," she said. How she hated the way disappointment made her sound, like she was some used toy that couldn't be played with anymore.

"How long have you known?" she asked.

Derrick paused. "About a week," he said.

"Derrick!" she said. She walked to the window. "You've known for an entire week, and didn't think to tell me?" Her breath fogged the window pane.

"I wanted to tell you. I honestly did, but I did not want this week to be spoiled by the thought of me leaving," he said.

"So you decided to wait until now to let me know?" said Katherine. She fought the wave of anger washing over her. It wouldn't do any good to get angry now, but she felt as though her heart was being yanked out of her chest by fishing line.

"I'm sorry," he murmured.

That caught Katherine off guard. Derrick was practically infamous for not apologizing or explaining his behavior to anyone.

He held out his hand to her. "Please, Katherine, don't turn away," he said.

She turned around to face him. He looked so sad, nestled among the sheets, pleading with his eyes for her to understand. She walked over to the bed and sat down beside him.

"It's just so soon," she said miserably.

"I know, I'm sorry Kat," he said. "Please don't be mad with me. I will do anything to make it up to you," he said.

She smiled weakly. "There's no making up for lost time, Derrick," she said. "You'll be gone for months and months, and I will never be able to see you during that time, or kiss you, or..." her eyes fell toward the tangle of sheets. "Or other such things," she finished.

"Come," he said, pulling her back down beneath the covers of the bed. She laid down beside him. He put his arms around her, and with that small gesture, her resolve broke. As she tucked herself into his body, soft tears began to fall from her eyes. She prayed that he wouldn't notice, that he wouldn't think her a weak, lovesick girl.

"I'll miss you," she said into the air.

He turned and breathed in the scent of her hair.

"You know that I will miss you terribly," he replied.

"No, I don't actually know," she said.

He propped himself up and tried to turn her around. "Why do you say that?"

Katherine blushed. "I mean, I don't know what I am to you, Derrick," she said. "I'm just a servant, and you're a captain in the navy. You're expected to marry one of these royal floozies, and I'm supposed to marry a baker's son." Katherine's face was burning. "I mean, it's not like I'm thinking of that with you, only that I care for you more than just one night," she said.

He smiled. "Katherine McPherson-" he said.

"And you don't have to care for me at all, I just wanted you to know-" she began.

"I love you," he finished.

"Because I-what?" she said. "You...you what?" She suddenly felt a ringing in her ears.

"I love you, Kat," he said. "All the days and all the nights that I've spent with you, you think I wouldn't be in love with the funny, witty, fiery girl who has stolen my heart?"

Katherine felt a tingling sensation in her stomach and palms. She wanted to laugh and cry and shout from the rooftops all at once.

She began to smile, but a worm of doubt crawled its way into her heart.

"Don't say things you don't mean, Derrick," she said.

He spun her around to face him. "I do," he said simply. "I have fallen in love with you, Kat, and when I get back, I promise that I will make all your patience worth it."

Katherine began to cry in earnest now. "Derrick, you drive me absolutely mad," she said.

He laughed softly. "Kat, I should like to know...do you feel the same as I?" he asked.

"Of course I do!" she exclaimed. "I will miss you every second of every minute that you are away. Of course I love you! I have loved you ever since you first took my hand and said my name," she said, suddenly bashful. "But what will your family think? You can't be seen to marry a-someone like me," she said.

"Damn my family," he said simply. "And damn anyone who does not accept what we feel. I swear Katherine, you make me happier than any man has the right to feel. I will be in agony from the moment I set foot on the ship, until I return to you. But know this," he said, lifting her chin to meet his gaze. "I love you, and I want you to be mine, and I yours."

Katherine's heart began to soar. "You do not know how long I have waited for you to say those words," she said.