Ch 51 re-building our lives

The shutters of the cameras around the room went click, click, click. Each one storing a photo of Tony in their memory cards, a photo of him in a wheelchair, a picture of him looking exactly like how the entire world felt—frail, grieving, but alive nonetheless.

And just like everybody else, no one really knew if being spared was worth it.

Tony pointed at a reporter who promptly said in a voice unsure and pleading, "So, what do we do now?"

"Move on," Tony wanted to say. Wasn't that what you did with loss? But he couldn't bring himself to say it, not when he knew there was no moving on for him. Not when Peter…

Tony shook away the thought and looked at Pepper who stood by his side, her hand on his shoulder, grounding him.

Instead of "Move on," he settled for "Rebuild."

He turned back to the reporters, each and every one of them nodding. "We rebuild. That's all we can do when tragedy strikes. We pick up the broken pieces and we try to make something else out of them, something worth living for."

He reached for Pepper's hand and squeezed it, a signal that he was done with the press conference. There would be no more answers to the questions the reporters still clamored to ask.

But among the raised voices that grew more frantic as he was rolled away, he heard one loud and clear, "What are your plans, Tony?"

…

The world found out exactly what his plans were when two months later, a short press release announced Tony and Pepper's marriage. It was a private court ceremony with close friends and family. Specifically just Happy Hogan, James Rhodes, and Harley Keener.

It was the best day of Tony's life since… since what happened.

…

The penthouse smelled like waffles.

Tony could already taste it in the air, imagine just how crisp it'd be. Pepper always made the best waffles. No offense to JARVIS (God rest his soul, because yes, user interfaces get a soul) or to FRIDAY and the other robots in his residence, but they just really didn't make it the way his wife did.

He could smell the waffles, stronger now, nearer and then, it appeared right before his eyes.

He looked up from the food and flashed Pepper an adoring smile. "I love you."

She handed him a fork and a knife, keeping matching ones for herself and then took a seat beside him.

"How's the farm coming along?" she asked as Tony took a slice off the waffle.

"Not a farm. A lake house," Tony corrected, showing her what he'd done so far.

Pepper cut a piece too and then studied the blueprint. "That's where the lake is, right? A little too close to the house, don't you think?"

Tony stuck the fork in his mouth and typed a few things on his tablet. "Adjusting the distance now," he said through his teeth.

"Better?"

Pepper nodded and tapped a corner, showing her the first floor.

There was a patio that led to a room labeled LIVING ROOM and right beside it STUDY. Across from it was KITCHEN and DINING AREA.

She went over to the second floor and saw BEDROOM 1, BEDROOM 2, and BEDROOM 3. She tapped the corner again and this time it showed GARAGE/WORKSHOP.

"Honey?"

Tony, with a mouth full of waffle, said, "Huh?"

"There's no lab in here. There's a workshop but there's no lab." Why was there no lab? Tony Stark? Without a lab? That was like Tony Stark without a limb.

"Yeah, no lab," Tony shrugged. "There will be no experiments in this household. I mean, I'm not going to be duplicating web-fluids anymore, am I?"

Pepper frowned. Tony had only ever worked in a lab with Peter and Bruce… and without Peter and with Bruce going off on his own to "find himself" or whatever it was he needed to come to terms with with the Hulk… Tony didn't see why he'd need a lab anymore.

"Okay," was all Pepper said.

Tony switched back to the blueprints of the second floor. "I'm thinking of putting the nursery here." He pointed at BEDROOM 3 which was the smallest of all the bedrooms. "And then just make BEDROOM 2 a guest bedroom or something. I mean, for Rhodey in case he'd visit or for Harley."

"Nursery?" Pepper smiled wryly. "You're getting way ahead of yourself. We aren't even trying."

They had agreed. They wouldn't be actively trying for a baby, at least not until their house was done.

"But we're also not not-trying." Tony turned to her, waffles and cutlery out of his mind. There was an animated shine in his eyes as he began to speak of his plans to her, "When we have a kid, and we will have one, I'd like him playing Legos in that room. It's nearest to ours. And in the workshop, forget learning how to hot-wire a car. He'll learn how to build one! And in the backyard right here, I'll teach him how to throw a ball and ride a bike, go camping… All the things that…" he trailed off, eyes growing sad.

"That what?" Pepper asked.

When he spoke again, his voice was soft and distant. "All the things that the kid used to do with his dad... Astronomy was his favorite"

Pepper's lips curled into a small smile. Tony rarely talked about Peter and when he did, it was always about a reference to some intimate conversation they had, things only Tony knew because Peter had trusted him with the information, had seen him as a second father.

Pepper narrowed her eyes at her husband. "So, we're having a boy now?"

That was enough to draw Tony's thoughts back and he grinned, "Or Her. But I'm pretty sure it's a Him because like I said, I had a dream about him."

"About Morgan."

"Yes and he was a boy and since I'm rarely ever wrong—"

Pepper pressed her lips to his, silencing him. "We'll see."

"Do you wanna bet?" Tony said against her mouth and he could feel Pepper's lips forming a smile.

God, he loved her.

And that waffle taste.

…

Pepper waddled in the kitchen, two framed pictures in either hand. She had come from the living room, where she was unpacking the last of the boxes before announcing that they've completely moved in, when she saw them.

Was it just her or was moving-in a lot more difficult as a pregnant woman? Let her rephrase that. Moving alone was difficult enough.

Tony was washing dishes in the kitchen as she walked in, a sight she never thought she'd see, but apparently living in a lake house brought out his domestic side.

Showing him the two picture frames, she asked, "Honey, where do you want these?"

Tony put away the last of the dishes and dried his hands before taking them from her.

She saw him visibly stiffen.

One of the pictures was a photograph of his dad when Howard was younger, and the other was of Tony and Peter.

Tony remembered that day. He had presented Peter with his certificate for completing his "Stark Internship" and they both laughed at the inside-joke.

"May's gonna love this!" Peter had said, chuckling.

"We should take a photo," Tony said, putting his arm around the kid and they both smiled. Unburdened, unadulterated smiles.

That was the closest thing to a hug Peter had gotten before he had stumbled in Tony's arms in Titan.

Tony started when he felt Pepper's hand on his arm. She looked worried but was trying not to show it, an attempt she failed because her body was pumping with hormones and there never seemed to be a day when she wasn't getting teary-eyed.

"I could put them back," Pepper tried to say but Tony promptly turned from her and then placed the pictures on the nearest shelf, just right above the dish-rack.

"Are you sure?" Pepper asked.

Tony adjusted the pictures, putting Peter's frame just slightly behind his dad's.

"Yeah," He took one long, last look at Peter and then turned to his wife. "This way Morgan can see her grandpa and her older brother whenever we have meals together as a family."

Pepper's lip quivered and Tony gathered her in his arms, holding her as close as was possible given her belly.

"Peter would love that very much," Pepper whispered.

Tony rested his chin on his wife's shoulder and finally let his own tears fall.