Chapter 179

"This isn't a jet, this is a flying luxury hotel." Tony said.

Erik laughed. "It's nice to have when over half of your life is spent traveling." He said, reaching down and making sure Pearl's seat belt was fastened correctly.

Two flight attendants began handing out drinks and snacks and Erik asked them if they wanted to watch a movie or listen to music.

"Got any Slayer?" Ian joked, thinking the prince of England wouldn't even know who they were.

"Actually, I do." He said. He tapped a remote and the opening to "War Ensemble" started playing.

"Everyone seems to harbor the opinion that "Reign in Blood" is their best album, but I prefer "Seasons in the Abyss", the last studio album for drummer Dave Lombardo, until 2006, and while it offered no discernible change in direction from what had gone before, the band's strength of vision was clear on "Dead Skin Mask"and "War Ensemble". Many believed that Seasons In The Abyss was the sound of Slayer stuck in a rut. However, this was actually a band in a groove, knowing precisely what they should be doing, and how to deliver it." Erik said.

Ian's jaw dropped to the floor. They all stared at him. Erik smiled and sipped his mimosa.

"I swear to god, Pearl. If you don't marry this man, I am going to." Ian said.

"Keep dreaming. He is mine." She said, eye fucking him.

They landed and Erik invited them all to stay at his home since they were only going to be in town for a few days. "Are you sure, man? We can rent rooms somewhere."

"Nonsense. There is plenty of room here." Erik said.

Pearl adored him. She couldn't keep her eyes off of him the entire car ride to the house. She felt something strange coming over her. It felt like something inside of her was changing, and for the first time in her life, she knew it was time for her to take charge of herself, truly. She was tired of being pulled around by everyone else's choices. She knew what she had to do. They arrived and Erik showed them to their rooms, telling them dinner would be done soon.

During dinner, John announced that their album had officially hit number one on the US rock chart. They all cheered and celebrated, but Pearl seemed to hold back a little. Dylan looked at her, "You ok?" He asked.

"I need to talk to you." She said. She got up and walked outside.

"What's up, Pearl?" Dylan asked.

"I can't do it all." She said, putting her head down.

"Ok. What do you mean?" He asked.

"I can't run a billion dollar corporation, be the lead singer of chart topping band and the significant other of a prince. I can't do it all and I don't know if I want to even try anymore." She said, looking like she had been thinking about it for awhile.

"I know it is a lot." He said. "But if anyone can pull it off and make it work, it's you." He said, putting his head down and staring at the ground.

"I'm tired. And all I've ever wanted was a normal life, and a good, secure home. To be a mother. And a wife. To feel love and friendship in a marriage. Not like my parents, who live in the same house but only speak to each other passing by. Dylan, it's all I've ever wanted. And it's been used against me as long as I can remember and especially lately with Rhys and David. I'm tired of being strong. I'm tired of being used." She said, feeling her eyes began to fill with tears. "And I think the time has come for that all to end. And I don't want to pass up my chance to truly be happy and regret it the rest of my life."

"You're thinking about quitting the band." He said.

"Music has always been an outlet for me. But not a life. Yes, I love to sing. And write. But I just can't keep doing it all. It's too much." She said. She knew she couldn't fully be with Erik while she was still touring and she couldn't put 100% into anything by juggling everything. "I love you and the rest of the guys with all my heart, you are my family, and I know this band means everything to you. I'm just conflicted, you know?"

"This is about Erik? Has he asked you to quit?" He asked, still looking down. For some reason he couldn't make eye contact with her.

"No. He would probably be angry that I am even considering it." She said. "But I love him. This isn't a fly by night kind of thing. This is real. And I want to make sure I'm making the right decision this time. I will eventually have to quit to be what he needs. And I will be happy about it. I'd quit it all to be able to be truly his, in every way." She said.

Dylan looked up finally but didn't look at her, he looked past her. Pearl turned around to see that Erik was standing there, hearing what she said. How long had he been listening? She thought.