Chapter 2: <I'm a Grandpa? And a Deer?>

"It's warm", D-518 thought, as he felt his flesh sweep across a silk-like substance; he couldn't tell what it was, with his eyelids glued shut.

He didn't know how long he had stayed there, but the mild scent of poinsettia flowers started to eventually fill his nose, while small rustles twinkled in his ears.

D-518 enjoyed the short solace, in a way that he wished for it to last forever; he did die, after all, along with the rest: B-1, A-715, C-7, C-145, and A-39. It didn't come until later, but a slight melancholy creeped up his bones, curling frown upon his lips; he was never one to wear his heart on his sleeve, but he couldn't resist the feeling.

He needed to express that pent-up thing in his...

He didn't even know what it is; whatever it was, it was raging like his hamster on his wheel.

Was he upset that he died?

He didn't know.

Was he upset that his "friends" died?

Were they even friends in the first place?

"They... Were my friends... Right?"

"... Were they?"

D-518 questionably asked himself over and over again, yet no matter time he did, he felt a little doubtful; "being friends is a mutual agreement between two... Friends... Right?"

"So... Do we even count as friends?"

"We spent Christmases together before... But it wasn't that fun..."

"Does it have it be fun?"

"..."

"A-715 had threatened to kill Santa Clause that year. Honestly... Saying that he was going to choke Santa to the other recruits was probably a mistake..."

"B-1 had to tie him up, and throw him into a closet to reassure the other kids, and all he said that night was; "I will never let that fat, bearded man escape my grasp. I am a MAN, I WILL get him", over and over again."

He sighed; "A-517 was real innocent at the time... A pretty nice guy, not that he wasn't until he died... But I never figured out how to say I wasn't gay."

D-518 chuckled at the thought, and started to talk to himself again; spanning his one-sided conversation with rhetorical questions, to an nonexistent party.

It was the first time that he could remember smiling with genuine joy; ironic though, since he died.

Perhaps if he was still alive, he would still be the same; the guy was practically shameless during work hours, but personality-wise, he was as fragile as your toddler cousin.

What it means by, "doesn't understand anything", it means that he was hinderingly dumb, and was always absentminded as if he didn't exist in the present.

If you needed to get something through, you would require an electrical chair, an interrogation room with sound-proof walls, buff bodyguards to intimidate him, and so-on-so-forth.

That was an exaggeration.

Or was it...?

Anyhow, it sounds adorable, but it's extremely irritating when the same explanation doesn't go through that stupidly thick skull of his. What ends up happening, is that you give up, and just stare at him, hoping that a gaze of disappointment, and frustration would make something click.

You know it's not going to work, but you still scream internally at his one brain cell, and hope his protein bars will somehow make it multiple to an average amount.

At least enough for him to understand.

... You wait, but...

He still doesn't get it.

You end up staring on to his head (because he's too short), and have to fight an urge to plant him feet-first, into whatever sort of floor he was on, as if he was a radish.

He didn't resemble one, but at that instance, you wouldn't believe how hard it would not to; bury him under the ground like the water-filled vegetable he was.

Cucumber, lettuce, zucchini, you would think.

Watermelon, aloe. You would think again.

Carrot, celery.

Potato, spinach.

Kale, brussels-

Yeah.

"Hah... Dying isn't so bad after all..." D-518 contently whispered, joyed by the silent, empty surroundings, and his new findings of himself; he wouldn't mind staying here longer, if it was possible.

He laughed, thinking about his past.

"Let's see... There was a time that A-517 ended up-"

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Before D-518 could finish his sentence, he felt a jolt shudder his body, while the temperature dropped to a contrastingly colder feel; he still couldn't see anything, but his other senses were functioning well.

There was some wild wind blowing in the background, and the sound of clapping hooves against some crunchy snow; some of them far away, some of them close to him. Some were drumming in a steady, casual pace, while others were inconsistent; the sound of play was there too.

D-518 didn't need to see, he could feel the vibe hitting his nose unfamiliarly, but for some reason, it felt natural to him; the faded voices around him, and the loud, to soft laughs warmed his core.

He felt naked; open, and free.

Funny, but he actually felt naked; as in, no clothes and, "nakey-nakey" type of "naked."

Yeah, that type of naked.

He wasn't given a second to start getting anxious, before a piercing shout interrupted his thinking process; the voice was noticeably kid-like, but still had hints of clear concern.

"GRAANNNDDDPPAA"

"DON'T DIE ON ME. PLEASE DON'T LEAVE LITTLE XIAO."

'WAAAAAAHHHHHHHH", it cried.

"... Grandpa...? Do I look like a grandpa?" D-518 cognitively asked, before blurting out his own opinion, a bit, "a bit" triggered by his name;

"... I know I'm short... And I know I look old."

"But I'm definitely sure that I'm not a grandpa."

He paused, before finally saying without shame;

"I HAVEN'T EVEN ENTERED ANDROPAUSE-"

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.

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The voice paused, then quieted down,"... What's andropause Gramps?-"

"... It's when men can't have children. I'm around my 20's-30's."

...

"WAAHHHHHHHH."

"THIS IS REALLY BAD!!!."

"GRANDPA HAS AMNESIA."

"LITTLE XIAO DIDN'T MEAN TO EAT YOUR HAY. I DIDN'T KNOW."

"IF I KNEW THAT YOU WOULD LOSE YOUR MEMORIES, I WOULD HAVE NOT DONE IT."

...

"The hell's this kid talking about?"

"I'm not a grandpa. I don't recall ever having kids... More or less grandkids..." D-518 argued, contemplating to himself once again, before he caught up to something: '"LITTLE XIAO DIDN'T MEAN TO EAT YOUR HAY. I DIDN'T KNOW."'

"Hay? I don't eat hay..."

"Can humans even eat hay?" D-518 questioned the voice, oblivious to everything but it.

"..."

"... Grandpa..."

"We're... We're reindeers."