It's so good Story and i like it so much. I can draw and if you wanna, i can do it like book with pictures. I will post it here sometimes and I will write you there as the author of the story. [img=update]😍😍😍. I'd be so happy for the next part of the story😋😍🤩😘
4 years ago
1
Food_Lover_197
I like it but the story goes by to fast and I have no knowledge of the characters. i do like that you switch povs but if you could add a litte more detail that would be nice😁
4 years ago
1
Simeon_Classic
So far i liked the story but it help you made the story slow down. How about adding more dialogue. Maybe describe the second character more. and maybe use ( when i got to school) instead of " fast forward to school"
all and all i think this story is not a bad start.
It's so good Story and i like it so much. I can draw and if you wanna, i can do it like book with pictures. I will post it here sometimes and I will write you there as the author of the story. [img=update]😍😍😍. I'd be so happy for the next part of the story😋😍🤩😘
I like it but the story goes by to fast and I have no knowledge of the characters. i do like that you switch povs but if you could add a litte more detail that would be nice😁
So far i liked the story but it help you made the story slow down. How about adding more dialogue. Maybe describe the second character more. and maybe use ( when i got to school) instead of " fast forward to school" all and all i think this story is not a bad start.
Reveal Spoiler