Lilac November

Mother seemed uncomfortable in the absence of Yennefer,which was no surprise because she always favoured Yennefer.But I think that is not why mother is uncomfortable.Yennefer has been acting weird ever since the incident at the Tress Garden.She has stopped dining with us,she won't talk to us,she seems to have locked herself away from us.I know that Yennefer thinks that I favour Indigo,but the truth is that Indigo is really hard to keep.I would say that I like Yennefer than Indigo but I think that would upset father.He used to love Yennefer when she was small and had blue green eyes as mother but one day when she got all angry and mad at father for not taking her to the harbour,her eyes suddenly changed into lilac colour.After that incident father always kept Yennefer and Yennfer always kept father at bay.I kind of think father is somewhat afraid of her,but Yennefer says that it was his fault,that her eye colour changed.But I can'tthink of anything he could have done.

Sometimes its really hard for you to keep yourself contained,I always wanted to talk to Yennefer,but father wouldn't let me near her.He always said "I dotted a bit too much on her,for she has turned into a shame.Lilac dear,listen to me,you are an amazing woman with inspiring beauty,unlike your sister who is pale and dull,you have to make the family proud"

I love making father happy,but as I seem to grow up,I look up to those words and wonder whether he ever thought about my or our happiness.

I asked mother

"Mother,are you alright?"

And she said

"Of course I am,why wouldn't I be alright Lilac,dear?"

And I replied

"You are not used to going out without Yennefer and you seem a bit uncomfortable too"

She smiled at me and said

"Yes,but thats not what that I am worried about,I am worried about us moving to Zondella,Yennefer is angry for us not discussing it with her"

I don't want to go too.But I can't do anything about it.This place is my everything.My home,my childhood,my teacher,my one and only love,I can't even think if leaving.All I could think was of me and Yennefer.When we were young we both used to plait our hair and stick flowers into them,we used to collect flowers and design our dressing tables.Yennefer was really amazing then,she was happy,she was funny.She was always in the garden,picking flowers,watering trees,building tree houses,she was different then,different from all the children in Grindilla.I used to watch her,dancing with the trees,I used to admire her for the love she had for nature,I used to think that she loved trees and plants more than any of us.Even though she was with the trees she always had time for me.She always had a present for me on my birthdays,she always taught me new things,we used to read together,we used make stories up,I had no doubt that she loved me.And I loved her the same.But after Indigo was born,everything changed,he never let me play with Yennefer,he always screamed and made a fuss when I used to read with,he always wanted to be the centre of attention,and years went by and we both were torn apart.For this I never forgived Indigo,but I never show it.I always wish that I was Yennefer,she says what that has to be said,she does what that she wants to do,I always wished I had courage like her.

I am waked from this fantasy by Indigo shaking me by shoulder.I look at him and all I feel is anger,I can see his lips moving but can't make out what that he is saying.After some time I am completely concious of my surounding and I can hear everything Indigo is saying.He asks me

"Are you all right?you looked quite far away?"

I can see mother glancing at our direction,I can see father far away buying drinks for us,then I look at Indigo and mutter

"Yeah,I am alright,and please let go of my arm you are hurting me"

He looks at me and smile.Then he walks to father.I was looking at the two big barriers in my life,when mother asked me

"You all right,Lilac?you looked like you were living in a completely different world"

I look at her beautiful face and answer

"I am fine,mother,I was just looking at my old childhood memories"

She laugh at that abd said

"You and Yennefer were a great pair.Ooh I never could stop you both littering the house with dead and alive flowers.And my dear god,your rooms,there were always flowers and logs,I mean literally wooden logs in your rooms,I always could get you inside somehow but Yennefer was intoletable"

I smile at those words and said

"When I see Yennefer the first thing I remember is the mud on her feet"

Mother chuckle at that and look at me sadly

"What happened,Lilac?what happened to you both?"

I was about to say Indigo,when both father and Indigo came in,father looked at me and said

"What is it that you both women were laughing at?"

Mother smiled at him and said

"We were talking of old times"

Indigo jumped into the convetsation and said

"I can't even think of what you could be doing with boring Yennefer"

And they both started laughing.Mother looked at me sadly and nodded at me,and I said

"We used to contemplate the stars"