She Is Not Her

" you did not answer my question.." he said to and grab me to again to face him..

" why.. who are you" I said to him.. no matter what.. whatever happened.. I hate him.. still nothing going to change...

" don't talk to me like that.. why you didn't looking at me.. and where you going last pass two day's.." he said me.. my eyes wilden I mean he know huh..

He also spying me.. where I am going.. what I am going.. what he thinking about huh.. I hate him..

And here I am feel guilty about kiss Eric.. he never Change.. I am wrong.. and now I got it.. I will not more thinking about him.. it's over.. I am done with him..

" are you spying on me.. how dare you huh.. and it's none of your business.. you understand that.." I said to him.. and push him hard.. he let go me.. and shock my sudden behavior.. but I don't care.. I walk way.. after that he did come for me.. or talk to me.. I think he also understand or feel that I am done with him..

I reached my dorm..

I close the door.. and fall in the ground.. and cry.. fuck.. why he's now come for me.. what he want now.. I don't wanted to see him... I hate him.. I hate him so much..

You don't.. you like him ava.. no matter what.. you like him.. my inner voice said to me..

No matter what.. he had effect on me.. I am still have feelings for him.. he's touch.. I can't forget this.. what to do.. I don't wanted to feel this.. I hate myself to like him.. I hate me..

I stand up on myself feet. And than grab my clothes and get shower.. to bit little relax... after shower..

I didn't go anywhere.. I get sleeping pills and drunk with water.. and sleep.. I don't wanted to do or go anywhere.. I feel executed.. numb.. and heartless.. to tell him cruel word's.. how much it hurt him when I said to him.. and just pushh way for me..

When I wanted to him with me.. to kiss me.. to pamper me.. to love me.. hug me.. care for me.. fuck I want him.. I need him.. but my ego don't want this..

I am so stubborn to do that.. thinking about all this.. I sleeped..

After that.. I walk up in night.. it's 11o'clock.. it's to late.. what I am do now.. thank god that I grab stuff to Keith.. and I have some chips to eat.. but I don't wanted to eat that.. so I get up and wash my face.. and grab my jacket.. grab key's.. and some money.. and left my dorm..

All building is silent.. no one in hallway.. all is empty.. I didn't scared... I walk to parking lot.. and start the bike.. and left academy..

When I am on my way.. I searched hotel.. I am so hungry.. wanted to eat something.. some spicy..

How about pizza orange noodles or ummmm maybe pasta will be work..

I far way to academy... and didn't know where I am.. but I don't care.. and still riding.. and than finally searched some hotel.. I park my bike there.. and remove my helmet.. and walked there..

Entering there.. it's almost empty.. aspect one or table two table..

I ignored all them.. and site empty table.. and wait for waiter to come and order my food.. I am so hungry damn..

I checked my phone.. there is James miss calls and anggi's.. they girls are waiting for me to P.T. I again miss it.. damn.. I have to stop ditching P.T.

I text anggi that I was sleep and forgot to came.. and than I thinking about call James.. but it's really late for that.. so I will call him tomorrow in lunch time..

Maybe he also worry about me.. I didn't talking to him last to two day's. I have to talk to him.. before he think that something happening to me.. I will talk to him tomorrow without forgetting..

Waiters come to me.. when I look up.. I look at it's almost empty.. but one corner table mm someone is sitting there.. and it's look familiar.. who's he.. I mean I damn know that I saw that guy before..

I forgot that waiters waiting for me to order.. but I ignored him.. and when that guy look up to me.. it's Eric.. what he doing here.. should I talk to him.. or not.. I don't know it's good idea.. or bad.. what if he didn't talk me.. or just snapp me.. I will be embarrassed..

" ma'am your order.." the boy waiting for me to order.. I looked at him with annoyingly.. than Order him and also tell him to serve there champion to Eric table.. and it's all on me..

He nodded and let go.. I don't know he will talk to me.. or not.. so maybe this drink will be work.. I don't know..

After that.. I saw that boy serve him drink.. he argue about it.. than he look at me with blank face.. and than got up.. and came to my table.. oohh damn.. I feel nervous.. scared.. what he burst out on me.. I don't know..

He come and site opposite to me..

" you Don't have to do that.." he said.. he said calmly.. I never heard him.. and he's voice is Georges man. I mean it's attractive.. damn he's so handsome man..

Stop thinking all this..

" what..? I said to him.. I don't know what to say more..

" the drink you just sand me.. " he said to me..

" sorry if you didn't like it.. I am so sorry.. I just thought.." I said to him than he cut me off..

" it's oky.. by the way what are you doing in this time.. it's late what if something happen.." he said little worried tone.. he's worried about me..

No if I am some other girl.. he also said to her same rights..

" actually I sleepover.. and when I woke up it's late and I am kinda hungry so here I am.. what are you doing here.. all alone.." I said to me..

" nothing I am short of own this so I am here for check.. " he said to me.. I surprise butt than I nodded..

" I didn't proper introduce you I am rose.. " I said to him nervously.. I don't know but I wanted to talk to him.. and I am going bullshit think.. I never did think like this..

" Eric.. so where are you living." He asked me.. I look up to him. And smile..

" actually I am leaving in sports academy.." I said to him.. and he surprise.

" you are in sports academy.. " he said to me.. I nodded hesitantly..

" Oohh.. that is.. ummm never mind.. good.. nice.." he said to me.. and ignored me.. something that I am missing here..

" I think I have to go.. " he ready get up.. I stop him..

" why.. I mean what happened.. something I am missing here.. did I said something wrong.." I said to him.. he site again.. and thinking about something.. I don't know what..

" actually that place is for upper class.. for us it's not this place.. so we are not like this.. and also we are not even get them enter to our place.. you know.. I hope you understand.." he said to me..

" so you're are saying me this that.. I am also not allowed to come your field.." I said to him.. and he nodded.. ohh damn.. it's bad..

" I am sorry for that.. I really don't mean to hurt you.. but it's that.. some of my talented friend's try there for admission but they kick them out.. so after that.. we always face of them.. and win some matches.. but they still don't wanted to accept lower class people.." he said to me.. I am peety for him..

" but you can do this right.." I said to him..

" I can.. and I will.. but I don't want to.. there is lot's of people who's more than deserve it to go there.. " he said.. he's really nice guys.. he's thinking is good.. I like him already..

" I will help out of this situation.. if you give me chance.." I said to him.. he's rise he's one eyebrow.. and thinking something..

" I don't think that it's good idea.. and I don't know you yes or not.. but that academy not that good like we thought.. there is lot's off illegal stuff done that we didn't even think about it.. that's why I hate it more.. " he said.. yeahh I know what he talking about..

" I very well know.. but that academy give opportunity that's why all are wanted to show there own talented" I said to him..

" I am agree on this.. but it's also based in just money.. if we have money we will complete our dreams.. if we don't.. than there is nothing.. " he said to me..

After that we didn't talk much.. I eat my food.. also asked tomorrow joint me but he said he already had her food. After I done.. I paid and we both left..

" so this is it.. huh.." I said to him.. and he look at me.. and smile.. and I smile to.. little blush also..

We both standing there looking each other.. I don't wanted to go.. but I have.. and he's to handsome. I looking at face.. he's eyes.. that's so attractive and something that I don't know.. I can't figure it out.. he's lips..

Damn thinking about he's lips.. i remember when I kissed him.. that to soft.. I wanted to try it again.. I mean who's don't want to.. I again seen his eyes.. and I see that he's also looking at my lips.. and I bit my lips.. ohh my god both are looking at thinking same thing..

Is he also want same think what I want.. or I just over thinking..

But it's not good idea.. I can't I mean we can't do this.. it's to odd.. I don't wanted to be after that uncomfortable to talking each other..

You still both are uncomfortable to talking each other..

Yeahh it's because he didn't know me.. and same goes to me..

" I think I should go.." he said.. he clear he's thought.. I just don't know what to say.. I mean my mind is blank.. but still I nodded.. it's better to be stop here.. or think ridicules and make myself dumb..

" you are not dead huh..." someone said to my back.. coming towards me.. I see Eric eyes is wilden.. I turned around and looking at who's that guys is..

I looked at them.. I never see them.. who's they.. and I looking at them.. they are all wearing jackets.. and they had guns with them.. what it is..

Don't tell me it's Justin's man.. if they are.. I am so dead.. I mean this is it.. I have to do something... before they do something.. I have to kill them.. why they all always come in bad timing.. I mean I am having my great time with this mean.. I literally avoid kissing him so did he.. but what.. seems like I have to show something to him.. what real I am..

" what are you doing here.. and she's not her.. live her alone.." Eric panicked and come to by my side.. and said to them.. he hold my hand.. I feel current.. damn him..

What the hell I am thinking about this situation.. stopp thinking rubbish..

" who are you all.. and what you want.." I said to them.. ignoring all feelings..

Eric know them.. means they are not Justin's man's.. means they are someone else.. who's I Don't know..

" sorry I didn't tell you about this.." he trying to explain me.. but one of there guy cut him of..

" ohh so you don't know us now.. and what you mean byy she's not her.." he looking at me and than look at Eric and said to him..

What I am missing here.. one more drama.. what I get myself in to this time...