CHAPTER 38

Anna forcefully gulped the food down her throat while scooping another spoonful of it. Legs trembling continuesly under the table, she shifted in the chair before stealing a quick glance at the man sitting right across her.

Ethereal would be an understatement, she thought. Raven was sitting casually and having dinner while on the other hand Anna was having a difficult time trying to keep her mind and thoughts in control.

He "actually" spoke to Elora on Anna's phone and informed her that it was "too late to leave".

Anna had rolled her eyes knowing that Elora won't buy it but her jaws almost hit the floor when Elora said,

"No problem. Please take care of her and have fun."

The sound of her giggles were still ringing in Anna's ears.

'Have fun? What does that mean?' she tried to hold her frown in but it was instantly replaced by nervousness when Raven had turned around with a smirk.

"I told you. She's fine." He handed her the phone and walked out of the room but before leaving, he stopped at the door and glanced at her over his shoulder.

"Change into something and come down for dinner." He motioned to the dress which was neatly laid on the bed. "I hope you heard your aunt" The playful smile tugged at his lips again. "I have to take care of you". He winked and with that he left.

Did he just wink at me?

Anna was standing paralyzed for a good minute when she realized she had to change and picked up the clothes. It was a satin night dress gown with a robe to cover. Surprisingly, it was exactly of her size. That made her wonder whether he already had it planned out to make her stay here but when Ms. Jones told her that it was Areum's clothes, she let the nervousness get the best of her.

'Oh God, I have to go in this in front of Raven?' She crossed her fingers as she walked down the stairs. Raven was standing at the coffee table when he glanced up, a chill running down his back when he saw her.

Anna could feel his burning gaze on her but kept her eyes on the floor. As she came and stood in front of him, their eyes met and she instantly regretted doing it. Jaws clenched, still and hooded eyes were staring down at her, devouring her with his gaze.

Anna looked away. Glancing everywhere but at his eyes and in the process she saw the Mansion which she had hardly observed when she came in. It was...big? Big was not the word. Gigantic may come a little closer. After a few minutes when he did not move or speak, she smiled nervously.

"Comfy," she pulled the robe tighter around her and saw how he gulped.

'Shit, I shouldn't have spoken about the gown' She mentally hit her head on the wall.

Anna had never felt so thankful to anyone before as much as now when Ms. Jones informed them that the dinner was served. Ms. Jones was a savior.

"Let's go" She had nervously flashed Raven a smile before quickly following behind Ms. Jones who lead them to the dinner table.

Since then until now, he was as quiet as a sea before storm. Anna already said her prayers numerous times in her head. She did not even know what was making her so anxious, the fact that she was wearing his late wife's clothes or that it hardly reached up till the mid of her thighs or the look in his eyes which seemed quite alarming, but in an exciting way.

"I'm done" She slowly placed the spoon down and saw how his eyes shifted back on her after God knows how long.

Okay, that's kind of a relief.

He leaned back on his chair with eyes fixed on her and Anna immediately looked around, searching for her savior, Ms. Jones. But She was no where in sight.

"Do you need anything?" Her head snapped in the direction of his voice and he was still staring at her with hooded eyes. Anna gulped.

"Me? No. I'm fine." She awkwardly laughed but it almost immediately turned down when he stood up from his chair. Her eyes locked down on her plate.

'Go. Go. Go to your room please.' She chanted it over and over again but her prayers were wasted when he came and stood right beside her and leaned down to her level. One hand on the head of the chair behind her back and the other raised her chin up and their eyes met again.

His fingers brushed across the side of her bottom lips, wiping off the little sauce that was smeared. Anna did not even realize what he was doing, too lost in his eyes which were concentrated down on her lips.

There was only one voice in her head, 'Kiss me. Kiss me please'.

Before it could come out of her mouth, Raven straightened up and stretched out his hand for her. Anna blinked, but then slipped her hand into his.

"I'll take you to your room" He intertwined their hands and lead her towards the stairs.

Room? Ms. Jones could have done that, she thought. Brushing off that thought, she looked down at their intertwined hands and smiled. Even among all the ex-wife story and complicated relationship mess, she couldn't find one reasonable excuse to not be with him. 

As her eyes travelled up his hand, the smile slowly faded from her face. The veins on his hands were popping and with the rolled up sleeve of his shirt, she could she them more clearly. She unknowingly bit her lips, as her eyes travelled up his arms to his biceps and neck.

'Oh God, he is unreal.'

Before her eyes could get enough of the view, he stopped in front of a room and turned around.

"This is your ro..." His words came to a halt when he saw Anna. Eyes glued to his face and bottom lip firmly in the grasp of her teeth, she was blankly staring at him.

Something stirred within him. The way her  pupils dilated and skin turned warm under his grasp on her wrist, it was undoing his will. He was loosing control and he could not let that happen. The last thing he would want is to hurt her again.

Reaching up, his thumb skimmed her chin and released her lips from between her teeth. Her eyes were so different from the girl he had seen for the first time.  They were timid and shy then and now filled with longing and desire.

Wasn't he the reason why she changed so much?

He suddenly let go of her hand turned his back on her.

"Go to bed." He said

Anna blinked at his back, her mind returning from wherever it had wandered off.

"Raven...I,"  she didn't know what to say.

"Goodnight Anna" His voice was pained.

Just when he was about to walk away, he was stopped by an unexpected question from her.

"Is this Areum's room?" Raven stilled then swiftly turned around and saw her facing the door of the room. Her voice was lower than he had ever heard her speaking.

"No. It isn't." There was a moment of silence before she turned around.

"Why did you give me Areum's clothes, Raven?" She looked him dead in the eyes as she spoke. He did not have an answer to that but stepped closer to her.

"Anna...." He reached out to her but she stepped back.

"No. I can't....I can't do this Raven." Raven frowned as he saw tears brimming her eyes. He hated it. He hated whoever made her cry, which happened to be him at the moment.

"Anna Please...." He tried to touch her but she kept moving away until the door blocked the way and she leaned back on it closing her eyes.

"I can't...." The tears finally found their way down her face.

"I can't become a shadow of your past. I am not her, Raven. I am not." She whispered as the small tears rolled down her cheeks.

Her words slapped him across the face but seeing her break down again because of him was unbearable. Why did he always make her cry.

He held her elbows pulled her into his arms, holding her close to his chest.

'I know you aren't her. But I still want you', he wanted to say but did not. She would not understand, she was not in the state to, so he just held her, close enough for her to hear how fast his heart was beating.

He tightened his arms around her when she slowly leaned into his chest. Anna was confused in and out, of what she was doing. Was he really over his past ? Did he just do everything because she looked like his ex wife?

After a few minutes when she wasn't crying anymore and the tears had dries off, Anna internally face-palmed herself.

"I'm sorry." She mumbled against his chest and pulled away a little to look at him. He still looked ethereal with the ceased brows and hypnotizing green orbs staring down at her.

"I shouldn't have said—"

"Don't." Raven interrupted her mid sentence.

He raised his hand and his knuckles brushed against her jaws. Anna closed her eyes as she leaned into his touch. Raven's eyes were fixed on her face, reading her expression when he noticed her biting down on her lip, again. She did it unintentionally but it sparked something inside him.

He tried his best to let it fade but as time passed by and she refused to open her eyes and kept brushing her face against his palm, Raven clenched his jaws.

He bent, one hand swiftly going under her knees and the other around her waist as he hoisted her up from the floor. Anna gasped and held onto his neck for dear life as he walked into the room he had previously mentioned as hers for the night.

He carried her like she weighed nothing. It did not even seem like he was trying. He walked to the kind sized bed and placed her down on it. He laid her back onto the pillow and pulled the covers over her which was probably not what Anna thought he was going to do.

"Goodnight Anna." He leaned down and placed the softest ever kiss on her forehead and turned around. She blinked.

'No, Don't leave.'

Anna grabbed his wrist before he could move any further away and his eyes locked down on her.

She said nothing and kept her eyes on him.

"Don't go, Please," There, she said it. And she knew how vulnerable it made her.

Anna sat up leaning against the headboard as Raven sat down beside her. Her eyes were down but hands were still holding Raven's wrist like he'll run of if she will let go.

"I am not leaving." Raven said as he tucked a section of her hair behind her ears.

The action forced Anna to look up into his eyes and her heart started thumping hard against her rib cage. His face was a few inches away from her. Wherever she tried to focus her eyes, it finally darted down onto his lips. Her heart was racing miles per second while she unconsciously switched her gaze from his eyes to down onto his lips.

Raven on the other hand was loosing his little left control observing her actions. She could not say what she wanted but her eyes would show it, always. He had always seen it in her eyes.

Don't do it, his subconscious said but before it could even registered to his brain, Raven was already leaning down to her face.

Anna felt his lips slightly brush against hers and she let go of everything that was holding her back. She needed someone to control the fire which was burning within her and she knew he was the one, the only one for her.