Kosmos 2

"You disgraceful woman!" Aster roared.

"Mom! Wha-?Why?"

"WHHHHHY? You dare ask me why???"

Stellar's lips quivered. She raked her brain for a thing that she might have done in accident but couldn't come up with anything. Standing her ground, Stellar refused to say sorry. 

She promised herself that she would work on not saying sorry just to appease someone, so that was the perfect time for her to practice on it. 

So, she jutted her chin up and angrily wiped the hot, salty tears that streamed down her cheeks. "I maintain my innocence over whatever you're accusing me of."

"Innocent? You? After getting caught dating a deacon? How will you explain that, Stellar?" Aster seethed, almost snapping the pen in her hand.

"What the F?! Me? Dating a deacon? Who? Holden? Where did you even get that news?"

"Does it matter? You were lucky Beau got your disgusting photos taken down when I asked for his help."

"Photo? Help? What photo are you talking about? I don't even know anything about it." Invisible smoke streamed out of Stellar's nose.

"It doesn't matter. It's deleted. I don't want others finding out that you whored yourself and seduced a seminarian."

"Are you serious?" Stellar rolled her eyes over the absurdity of her mother. "You talk as if I seduced a married man," Stellar scoffed in derision.  

Stellar's eyes mirrored the same anger in her mother. She straightened her back and held her chin up.

She didn't want to argue with Aster. She knew that Aster had a rebuttal to every word that she would say. "You speak of me as if I sullied our name."

"You will dirty our name if word gets out about Holden being a deacon. Now stay the hell away from him. I don't want another photo of you and a priest floating around our circle. You will just ruin your sister's engagement with Beau. Do you understand?"

Stellar wanted to infuriate Aster. She wanted to tell her mother the truth. 

She wanted to inflict some pain on Aster for hurting her feelings, but Stellar didn't want to drag Cassy in the picture, especially now that she was with a child.

Picking up the desk calendar on the floor, Stellar wordlessly placed it on Aster's table.

"You didn't answer me, Stellar. Do you understand what I said?"

"Yes, Mother," Stellar gritted through her teeth before turning her back to leave.

Stomping her way to the ladies' bathroom, Stellar cried her heart out inside a cubicle. 

When her chest calmed down from the painful heaving, she dug up her phone from her pocket and typed her name in the search engine. However, nothing showed up.

Next, she tried typing Holden's name, but her brows knitted when nothing showed up as well.

What the F?

Suddenly, a thought bubbled up in her thought. It was a reach, but there was no harm in trying.

So she reactivated her social media account to find a trail of the infamous photo. As soon as the app loaded, her phone vibrated with each notification she received. 

Two hundred messages, but not a single notification whatsoever?

What the F?

Skipping the messages, Stellar scoured her account, checking if someone might have tagged her or so much so as left a clue. She tapped every hashtag possible, but she saw not a single photo of her.

After her failed search, she then moved on into her messages, but she just filtered it out to one person: Yanyan. 

She was the only person whom Stellar and Holden had a photo taken with. It must be her, right?

Stellar's heart thumped in her chest. She found Yanyan's message buried beneath the pile of 'Hey, Stellar, remember me?' messages.

Opening it, she read it in a whisper. "Stellar babe I'm sorry beau told me to take down our photo because I said you and holden were dating my mistake please forgive me I can't reach your old number here's mine 6391xxxx."

Okay. It was clear that Yanyan just typed her message in a panicked frenzy that she forgot to capitalize and use proper punctuation. 

Stellar felt bad that her friend was a casualty over this small bump. Copying the number, she then dialed it on her screen to give Yanyan a call.

On her first try, the call was canceled. She thought that maybe Yanyan intentionally canceled the call because it was an unknown number. So Stellar sent her a message instead.

Stellar: Stellar. Call me back.

After her message was read, Stellar's phone rang. That was quick, she mused. She answered the call right away and spoke with Yanyan who breathlessly explained to her what happened that night after she uploaded their photo.

Yanyan spoke nonstop. Just like her message, she didn't bother to punctuate her speech as she spoke. She reassured Yanyan that it was an honest mistake on her part, and not to worry about it.

"Holden is Aki's friend. He's a deacon," Stellar told Yanyan the truth. 

"Whaaaat? Walang hiya ka[1]. But he's hot AF."

Stellar giggled. Her friend could be naturally crass sometimes. "He is, but he's off-limits. And there's nothing going on between us."

"Really? Why am I not buying what you said? Well, it's not yet too late for you, girl. I think he secretly likes you. I mean, the way you guys stared at each other. I really thought you guys were dating."

"Hey!" Stellar snapped. "Stop planting seeds in my head."

"No. I kid you not. He's into you, Stellar. Do you know? He was never photographed before that's why my account exploded when I uploaded our photo. Hahahahahahaha! I was popular for an hour. It felt nice. Oh no, I shouldn't be celebrating. Did I get you into trouble?"

Yanking a tissue from the roll, Stellar blew her nose and smiled. "No. I'm fine. I was actually unaware of what happened until this morning, and it's not your fault."

Ending the call, the two friends promised to schedule a lunch date in the future. She then sent a thank-you message to Beau for his fast and responsive handling of the situation. His name flashed on her phone screen, but she ignored his call.

Instead, Stellar stayed inside for a few seconds to relax before heading outside. She didn't want employees to see her tear-stricken face.

Looking up on the ceiling, a rueful smile curved Stellar's lips. Her mom didn't have to react that way. It was just a misunderstanding. Why did she have to lash out at her instead of listening to her explanation?

It felt unfair. It felt as if no matter what Stellar did, Aster would always find a fault to pick on. To her mother, Stellar would never be enough.

Her lips quivered, and tears welled up in her eyes yet again. Biting her inside cheeks, Stellar rolled another tissue on her hand to dab the corner of her eyes dry. 

She promised herself that this would be the last time Aster would make her feel inadequate.

She reminded herself that she would love herself more this year. This was Stellar's cue, and there was no better way but to distance herself from people who were toxic to her being.

Dipping her hand in her pocket, she frisked it until she felt a smooth card. Clarity painted Stellar's face as her thumb traced the name on the card: Kimberly Rice - Property Consultant.

[1] 'Walang hiya ka.' means 'You're shameless' Often used as an expression in Filipino. :)