For What Reason

"I'm sorry," Theo said for what had to be the tenth time, staring at his shoes.

"I told you already, it's not your fault," Darian said, hands on her hips. "It's not like any of us expected this core thing to have...standards."

Though he very much hadn't wanted to, Theo had stumbled out of the chamber and told the others everything that had happened. Judging by the knowing look on Tabitt's face, she hadn't been surprised by the result. That didn't make it sting any less.

"Quite high standards, at that." Meg scratched behind her ear. "Well, what should we do? Just give up on this one?"

"I'd say that is our best course of action, my liege." Cay spun toward Darian, not even bothering to hide his eagerness. "It isn't like you ever needed the Star of Miriel in the first place. So let's leave this place and resume our travels, shall we?"

Tabitt flung a hand to her heart. "You don't want to catch up, Cay? How you wound your poor Elder!"

While Cay sputtered indignantly, Theo rubbed the Star shard between his fingers. Its warm Levia comforted him, but still couldn't get rid of the disappointment settling heavy in his stomach.

Zenith's grip tightened on his shoulder. "Theo. Are you all right?"

"Yeah, I…." Theo swallowed. Already, he couldn't detect a trace of the core's Levia. It almost felt like the whole thing had been a dream.

Yet the shadow's final questions rang loud and clear in his memory. 'What is your wish? For what reason do you fight? For what reason do you want power?'

"I…." Theo cleared his throat loud enough for everyone to turn his way. Their attention made him burn, but he stiffened his shoulders and made himself keep on talking.

"I want to try again."

"What?" Darian, Meg, and Guntar all asked at the same time.

"I want to try again," Theo repeated, more confident. "She said if I could give her a reason, then she might change her mind. So I just...have to come up with the right reason."

"Are you certain, Theo?" Zenith turned toward him, eyes shining with concern. "Your Levia still feels unsteady. If you go in there again…."

Theo breathed out. "I don't know about immediately. But maybe if I had a little more time to think…."

"Hm." Darian rubbed her chin. "So you're saying you'd like to stay here and keep trying until the core accepts you."

"Right." Theo clenched his hand into a fist around the shard. "No matter how many times it takes."

A wry grin quirked across Meg's face. "Persistent as ever, eh? That's my student."

"Is that all right, Elder?" Darian addressed Tabitt. "Will you allow us shelter until Theo convinces the Star core?"

"If he can do it within seven days," Tabitt said. "Apologies, but the Law of Seven applies to all. Even you, Prince."

Darian inclined her head. "Understood." Straightening, she shot Theo a sharp look. "How does that sound? Is seven days enough time?"

"Um, it should be." In fact, he sure hoped it wouldn't take as long. "But, uh, what's this Law of Seven thing?"

"We sages train our Levia for the sake of all Tielans, but even we have limits," Tabitt explained, tucking her hands inside her sleeves. "Thus the Law of Seven – non-sage travelers may only stay at the temples for a maximum of seven days. This is to ensure we don't overextend our resources."

"I see." The rule might sound harsh, but it made sense in a land just as harsh.

"So it's settled." Darian clapped her hands. "We'll be staying at Mount Neym for the next seven days, or at least until Theo successfully obtains the Star core."

All this time, Cay's face had been contorting into increasingly nasty expressions. Finally, unable to contain himself any longer, he jabbed a finger at Theo and shouted, "My liege, just how far are you willing to go for this boy's childish whims?"

The sheer poison in his voice made Theo flinch. But Zenith's grip tightened and he stepped forward. "Cayelci – " he began, a warning in his voice.

Only for Darian to speak over him. "I told you already, Cay. Theo is a valued comrade and I trust him with my life. I don't want to hear you speak about him like that ever again."

Her voice became cool, her eyes hard. Slumping his shoulders, Cay sighed, "Very well, my liege."

While Theo felt glad Darian had defended him, he also couldn't suppress a strange flutter of discontentment. Would he ever be able to summon that kind of resolve himself? Maybe if he could, the core would have accepted him already.

Then he'd just have to find his resolve, he told himself. Something stronger than wanting to learn more about his mom; Cay wasn't too far off calling that a child's whim.

And now, he had a week to do it.

~*~

"Geez, what's her damage?" Sam declared, slamming her fist into her palm. "Talk about picky! You'd think she'd want to be completed!"

"Who knows what a magic crystal wants." Ryllis leaned back with her hands behind her head. "Protecting your friends sounds like a decent enough reason to me."

"Yeah, yeah! You tell 'em, Ryllis!" Jin bounced up and down next to her, tail wagging. "Ooh, this is yummy!"

With that, he slurped down another spoonful of steaming soup. Grinning, Fia gave him a noogie. "Hey, don't let Cay hear that!"

Not that he would, since he'd apparently decided to stay on board the Blue Sky. Everyone else had accepted Elder Tabitt's invitation and gone to lunch at one of the temple's dining halls. The long stone tables bustled with young black-robed sages, happily chattering and paying little mind to the guests among them. Theo supposed it couldn't be that uncommon a sight for them.

Jin was right about the soup. Rich and creamy, it brimmed with tender root vegetables. Judging by the pleasant warmth that trickled through Theo's Levia, it had been enhanced just like Cay's cooking.

Even so, Theo barely tasted it. He just couldn't get his mind off the Star core's questions. Why wasn't protecting his friends a good enough reason? Because he'd blurted it spur of the moment? Because it wasn't specific enough?

If he thought about it, it was true he didn't really have a reason anymore. Not just for completing the Star, but for...well, everything. He hadn't even intended to go to Tielos in the first place.

Before, he'd had one simple, clear motivation to fight. Save Victor. But now….

His insides twisted as he remembered their last battle. Even now, the memory of Victor's words, his bald-faced declaration that he'd done everything for Theo's sake, sent white-hot rage pooling through him.

To hell with that selfish bastard. He could go around fighting with the Infernal Legion all he wanted; it was no longer Theo's responsibility to try to get him back on the right side. Victor was an adult and had already made his decision. A completely stupid decision based on a fantasy of a perfect little brother he'd never had, but that also wasn't Theo's problem.

Theo was amazed by how little regret he felt when he though about it that way. If anything, it almost felt freeing.

But without Victor, he no longer had a concrete reason for fighting. So what now?

He'd decided to stay in Tielos and had joined the crew of the Blue Sky. So didn't that mean he was now fighting to fulfill Darian's mission?

But even after meeting her crew, he still didn't have a clear idea what it really meant. No way would the Star core accept this reason when he himself didn't.

So that left him back at square one. Sighing, Theo stirred the soup with his spoon.

"Theo?" Zenith turned toward him. "Is something the matter? You ought to eat in order to get your strength up."

"Oh." Theo blushed. "Yeah, you're right. Sorry, my mind was wandering."

As he scooped up a spoonful of vegetables, Zenith nodded briskly and said, "Understandable. All the same, try not to overthink things. I'm sure the answer will come to you."

"I know. Thanks, Zenith." Theo couldn't help the grin that tugged at his mouth. Once again, he had the privilege of witnessing this caring, almost mom friend-like side of Zenith, and he couldn't get enough of it.