Chapter Thirty Six

Chloe sighed to herself as she perched on the bed and began to trawl through the mountain of paperwork that she had to do. Her eyes flickered upwards as she heard the front door open and close and Lee walked into the bedroom.

"Hey." she smiled. She couldn't help but notice how attractive he looked in his casual dance wear.

"Hey beautiful." he smiled, bending down to peck her on the lips.

"How was rehearsal?" she asked.

"Good, we've figured out all the routines now I think." he told her, before throwing himself down on the bed behind her. Chloe nodded slowly and returned to her paperwork, very much aware that she had to have it completed before the end of the day. Lee slowly sat up on the bed and crossed his legs, before wrapping his arms around Chloe's waist and gently pulling her onto his lap.

"I've been waiting all day to be back here though." he admitted, placing his chin on her shoulder, his fingers slowly tracing small circles on her stomach.

"You've only been gone for a couple of hours." Chloe giggled.

"I know, but it feels like all day." he said.

"Smooth." she smiled, turning her head to face him and gently kissing his lips. Eventually she broke the kiss and turned back to her paperwork, desperately trying to focus and not become distracted by the feeling of being in his arms. Whenever he touched her, it was like something inside her ignited, her skin constantly tingled like an electric current was flowing through it. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up as Lee slowly began to plant soft kisses on her neck.

"I have to get this done, stop distracting me." Chloe said quietly.

"What are you doing anyway?" he asked. Chloe found herself feeling slightly disappointed when he stopped kissing her.

"It's a contract for the band, I'm checking it, before I speak to the four of you about it." she told him, turning over to another page.

"That sounds boring." he smiled. Chloe jumped slightly as he returned to kissing her neck. Lee smiled to himself as Chloe continued trying to resist him, determined to pretend that she was engrossed in the contract.

"Chloe." he whispered hoarsely in her ear.

"I think this contract looks amazing." she said quietly, completely ignoring him. Lee smirked to himself and gently stroked her hair, smiling in satisfaction as she shivered.

"They want to use a song as a soundtrack for a film." she told him, a slight catch in her throat. Lee ignored her. Chloe glanced down at his hands as he gently lifted the material of her shirt and placed his warm hands against her bare stomach. He could feel Chloe trembling nervously as his hands took hold of her shirt and gradually made their way upwards.

"Lee stop." Chloe squeaked as he was about to remove her shirt. Lee instantly stopped what he was doing and watched her closely as she slowly climbed off his lap and stood up.

"What's wrong?" he asked as he watched her rummage in a drawer and pull out her sportswear.

"I need to get changed, I'm going for a run." she told him, standing in front of him, holding onto her change of clothes. Lee raised his eyebrow and waited for her to get changed.

"Don't look." she told him.

"Why not?" Lee challenged her, refusing to look away.

"I'll get changed in the bathroom." she said quietly, quickly walking away. Lee sat silently for a few moments, waiting for her to return.

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked as soon as Chloe returned. He couldn't stop himself from gazing in wonder at her beautiful hourglass figure.

"Of course not, why would you say that?" Chloe frowned as she put her foot up on the bed and began to tie the shoelaces.

"Because we've been dating a few weeks now and I feel like you're not really into me. If that's the case, I'd rather you just said." Lee said nervously, feeling slightly sick at the thought of losing her.

"Of course, I'm into you, I love you." Chloe frowned. Lee smiled at her, suddenly feeling relieved.

"Why don't you let me see your body, you always move away from me?" Lee asked.

Chloe sighed silently to herself, not sure how to answer his question.

"You won't even get changed in front of me.' Lee prompted her.

"I know." Chloe sighed.

"You've seen me naked loads of times." Lee said.

"Yes, but that's because you have a lot of body confidence, you walk around the house naked." Chloe said, smiling slightly.

"And then forget that I'm naked and answer the door to the post woman." Lee laughed.

"Well, I think she enjoyed it." Chloe giggled.

"You're so cute when you laugh." Lee told her. Chloe blushed and looked at the floor, like she always did when she received a compliment.

"I'm sorry if you feel rejected, I can't help it." Chloe said quietly.

"I know, I get that you have confidence problems." Lee said reassuringly.

"That's putting it mildly, I literally hate the way I look, my body most of all." she admitted, surprising herself at how easy it was to admit.

"Oh Chloe....I wish you could see how beautiful you are." Lee said sadly. He always found it upsetting listening to Chloe tear herself down all the time.

"You're so naturally beautiful, people stare at you all the time when you are out, you just don't notice it." he tried when she remained silent.

"I think they are staring at you." she argued.

"Some of them recognise me, but Chloe everyone says how beautiful you are." Lee insisted, desperately trying to make her see how amazing she is. Chloe couldn't help but smile at how sweet he was being, even though she didn't believe him, she appreciated that he was trying to make her feel better.

"Also, you look really hot in your lycra." Lee smiled.

"This is easier than getting undressed in front of someone, when you are naked you are completely vulnerable." she told him. Lee sighed sadly as he stood up and walked over to Chloe. She smiled as he pulled her into a tight hug.

"You know how much I love you and I wouldn't judge you." he whispered in her ear.

"I'm really sorry." she whispered.

"Sorry for what?" he asked gently.

"I've made you wait too long, you are a highly sexed person, it's not fair of me." she said quietly, feeling slightly guilty.

"It's not just about me, I admit I really want you, but I can wait until you want me too." he said, finally letting go of her and looking her in the eye.

"I do want you, I'm just nervous and embarrassed." she told him.

"I know, I remember you saying sex is a big deal to you. Did you feel like this when you were with Andy?" he asked gently.

"Not exactly." she said quickly.

"So, if you can undress in front of him, then why not me?" he frowned, feeling slightly hurt that maybe Chloe didn't trust him.

"You don't think that I'm going to cheat on you like he did do you?" he asked, his hand gently stroking her cheek.

"You know I'd never do that." he added.

Chloe remained silent, quickly wiping away stray tear that had escaped her eye. She knew that the moment she'd been dreading would come eventually, but that didn't make it any easier to tell him.

"Chloe, I feel like there's something you're not telling me." Lee said nervously.

"I didn't undress in front of Andy; we didn't do anything." she sighed.

"But you were together for years." Lee frowned.

"He said that he was religious and didn't believe in sex until after marriage, so we had to wait, but then I obviously found out that he'd been sleeping with other people behind my back. So, he clearly didn't want me." she explained.

"That'll destroy your body confidence." Lee muttered, sounding slightly angry.

"I wasn't very confident before then to be honest, but it's worse now." she said quietly.

Lee nodded slowly, feeling slightly emotional at what she'd just told him. Andy had always seemed like such a nice person, but he'd ripped out Chloe's heart and stomped on it. Not only had he left her to pay off his debts, but he'd left her with scars too. All of her insecurities that were following her around and hindering her life were a direct result of his actions. Lee really wished that he could make him pay for hurting the person that he loved.

"So, I've never actually undressed in front of anyone." Chloe admitted nervously, not entirely sure how he would take it. Lee stared at her and slowly stepped back.

"Wait, are you saying you're a virgin?" Lee asked quickly.

Chloe nodded slowly.

"Shit." he muttered under his breath, his complexion suddenly turning pale.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked quietly.

"Because it's embarrassing." she said. Chloe watched Lee closely as he began to pace, his facial expression looking slightly flustered.

"Are you angry?" she asked.

"No, I just don't know what to do." he muttered, still pacing.

"What to do about what?" Chloe frowned.

"Why did you have to be a virgin?" he said quietly, running his hand through his hair.

"I didn't realise that it would be such a big problem." she said, her heart plummeting when she realised that he was disappointed in her. Even though she was nervous to tell him, part of her had hoped that he would respect her for it and feel honoured that she wanted to give her virginity to him. Never in a million years would she have guessed that he would hate the idea. Clearly, he didn't want to be with someone who didn't know what they were doing.

"I'm sorry." she said, fighting back the tears that were threatening to spill.

"What are we going to do?" he muttered, almost to himself.

"I don't know what you mean." she said quietly.

Eventually Lee stopped pacing and turned to face her, a sad expression etched on his handsome features.

"I'm not taking your virginity Chlo." he told her firmly.

"You wouldn't be taking it; I would be giving it to you." she whispered. Chloe slowly walked over to him, placing her hands against his chest to stop him pacing. She wrapped her arms around his waist and held him tightly, craving some comfort as she tried to fight back her tears. She frowned as Lee took hold of her arms and quickly removed them from his waist, pushing her away slightly.

"I need to think." he said quietly, almost like he was talking to himself.

"Think about what?" she asked nervously. Lee remained silent and stared at the ground.

Chloe felt like she had been punched in the chest. It felt like history was repeating itself, first Andy didn't want her and now Lee didn't either. She could feel her legs becoming weak, so she subtly leaned against the wall, determined not to let him see how upset she was. She couldn't even bring herself to ask why he didn't want her; she knew the answer anyway. She'd always known that he was way out of her league. He was used to beautiful young models; she was kidding herself that he would be happy with her.

"I'm not good enough for this, I can't be your first." he said thoughtfully.

Chloe stared at him in numb shock, not entirely sure what he was thinking or why they were having this conversation. He remained silent and started to pace again.

"I'm done with this conversation." Chloe snapped as she turned and walked out of the room.