Nervous

CECILE

My god I'm getting nervous as to what will happen tonight.

I hope their plan will turn out good. Mommy and Auntie did everything they could just to pull this party over.

Haisxt.. I Hope when AA knows the truth she won't get mad at me. Well what I did is unforgivable but it's for our future. We really need to lie to her because.

Your hard to reach AA why?

I was standing in the veranda of my room here in the hotel where the event will be held, I was watching the people who decorates and put all the chairs and table. When someone knock on my door.

Knock

Knock

Knock

Whose that? I ask to someone outside thru my veranda.

Miss Cecile I'm one of the makep artist that will do fix your makeup and hairdo, my team is with me are you ready Miss Cecile. He or she said thru my lock door.

Yes I'm ready, you can come in now. I reply.

I had no choice but to unlock my door and let them in. As they enter I sit down to the chair that was in front of my vanity mirror here in the room.

They started doing their job, and as I was staring at the mirror I was chanting to myself over again.

This is it, this is the time that I will be true to myself and to others. I can now freely say to the world who is the real me and this is the right time to be truthful to her. And to let her know what she needs to know.

I'm now ready AA to what you will say to me, ready if she accept me or not but am I really ready?

If this party goes wrong I will need to think of ways to fulfil my dream and that is to be with her.

And my dream to let her know how much I love her since then..

My mom inform me that AA and her mother is here but AA is still inside the car.

My mom and Auntie is talking to each other as what I see them thru my veranda.

I'm done with my outfit and makeup so what I'm waiting is for the party to start.

Its been half an hour past when Auntie got outside to fetch AA.

Just after a few minutes someone knock on my door.

Knock

Knock

Knock

Come in. I said.

My mother enter here in my room.

You should stay inside why are you there in the veranda anyway? My mom said.

I'm just enjoying the view mom, so why are here? I ask mom.

I'm just checking you is that bad my baby? Mom said while being sweet to me.

Mom I'm okay but I'm just a little nervous right now. Is this normal mom. I said to my mother while leaning my head on her shoulder.

She just comb my hair as if calming me down. This is what I miss with my mom, being sweet to me even though I'm a full grown woman now.

I didn't take this moment to her because this is the only time that I feel how much she loves me.

I know they are doing this for me but I do know that I was the one that was directly involved with this.

I want this and they tolerate me even spoiled me. And I'm thankful for that.

Me and mom stay like this for a while before she decided to go out and be back in the party.

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AA

Why am I suddenly getting nervous like this? I mumbled to myself.

Where outside of this grand hotel and my mother is in inside while she left me here in the car, she told me to wait. And I don't know why.

The hell with what I'm feelings. I hate getting nervous like this because if my feelings are true then there is something I need to get ready for. This feelings of me is telling me to brace myself to what will happen tonight.

I think my fiance is here so this is still the night that will meet each other.

Thank god I didn't buy any props because if everyone see like that my carreer will be doomed.

Then I must make her realize that she shouldn't choose me because I will make her life a living hell since this night, she wants this then have a taste of my bitchiness.

Have the taste of hell.

I waited for about half an hour before mother came back for me.

She said that I should stay inside in of the one of the hotel then when it get started someone will call for me.

I can't understand what is happening right now but what I do realize is that I'm one of the main event of this party.

And when I'm inside the room I go straight to the veranda to see what is happening down there.

But when I go to the veranda I think I saw someone I know in the veranda of the next room or maybe my eyes is just deceiving me.

I look to the stars above and the moon afar. Asking some question to them.

Will this be all worth it?

Will this affect my carreer?

Am I going to be happy?

Will I be able to find her?

Can someone answer my question?

After saying all those things to the stars and moon I stay quiet and just enjoy the serene view of the night.

Waiting for someone to answers my question and the pathetic thing is no one will answer them they will just stay questions for me.

I feel like singing to the moment now.

"Have you seen her?

Did you see her pass this way?

What is it about her?

Is it her eyes? Maybe

But I'm not so sure

Is it her laughter?

Something I've never heard before

So many questions but the answers are so few

All I really know is, I love you

So many questions but the answers are so few

All I really know is, I love you

What is it about her

That makes me stare

That makes me wanna run my fingers through her hair

Will I find her? Maybe

But I'm not so sure

Will she be mine?

I can't stand this searching any more

So many questions but the answers are so few

All I really know is, I love you

So many questions but the answers are so few

All I really know is, I love you

So many questions but the answers are so few

All I really know is, I love you

So many questions but the answers are so few

All I really know is, I love you

Since the only time I see her near

Is when I close my eyes

Should I keep it that way

The only way I can make her stay"

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***raen***