Chapter Eleven

It came out more like an angry declaration than a sincere confession. My lips quivered as I slowly raised my head to see his reaction.

He was smiling.

"I like you too CJ," Seth replied.

I studied his facial expression, and I knew that he wasn't taking me seriously.

"I... I am serious," I added, my voice shaking. "I... I really like you Seth."

He pressed his lips together, raking a hand through his hair.

"I like you too CJ, as a friend, of course," he stated, then he averted his gaze. "Nothing more."

I chewed my lips as my breaths quickened.

"But Seth... I..."

I couldn't think of anything else to say. What did I expect from him?

"CJ, I'm not a one-woman guy. I thought you knew that."

Yes. I did. So why did I think that the outcome would be different?

"I don't want to play with your feelings because I honestly want to be your friend. I don't want to hurt you."

My chest constricted. I clutched a hand on my throat, tears started forming in my eyes.

"I hope you understand, CJ. I'm not boyfriend material. I'm sorry."

It was getting harder to breathe.

I have to leave.

I faked a smile and said, "No, don't be sorry. I knew it was impossible from the start anyway. I just wanted you to know."

I took a step backward. I have to go. I can't cry in front of him.

"G-Goodbye, Seth," I said, my voice barely audible, and then I whirled around.

"CJ--"

"They need me at the booth!" I lied, walking away as quickly as I could.

I hope he didn't notice that I was on the brink of crying.

I descended the stairs hastily, repeatedly telling myself that it was okay. That the rejection wasn't a big deal.

It didn't help.

I reached the first floor without a single tear rolling down my cheeks. But my heart was breaking. The couples I saw holding hands along the hallway didn't help easing my pain.

There was only one person who could comfort me.

I laughed bitterly to myself. I should have listened to him. I should've tried to stop myself from developing feelings for Seth. I knew I was too ordinary. I knew that he would never notice someone like me.

ANGELO'S POV:

I was playing basketball alone at the gym. It was exactly what I wanted. I didn't want to be around people.

Why did I even come to school today?

I threw the ball to the basket. It went in.

I couldn't get CJ out of my head. I was wondering what happened. If she was able to tell him her feelings. And if she did confess, what did Seth say?

I shook my head. I'm sure Seth would say no.

But what if I'm wrong? What would I do?

My stomach tied into a knot as my knees weakened. I don't think I can handle seeing them together.

I'm in a dilemma. I don't want CJ to cry, but I also don't want her to be happy with someone else.

I snapped out of my daze when the gym door swung open. I turned around to see who it was.

"Angelo!!!"

CJ ran toward me. Her face was crumpled, her eyes welling up with tears. And then she jumped. I opened my arms to catch her, but because I was unprepared, we fell to the floor. My back hurt a bit.

"CJ--!"

Then she started crying.

I knew it. Her first love shattered her heart. Great.

Despite knowing that I wouldn't have to bear seeing them together, CJ crying was also like a punch in the gut.

"A-Angelo..." she muttered, sobbing. She was looking up at me, her arms wrapped around my neck.

"He doesn't feel the same."

"Come here."

I pulled her even closer, then I embraced her. I stroked her hair gently. CJ hugged me back.

"Of all people, why Seth?" I murmured bitterly.

"I know there was little to no possibility of him liking me back. I just thought that maybe... He'd take a chance on me. It hurts, Angelo," she said. "He was really nice to me, Angelo. I was shallow, I guess. I just fell for him instantly."

She slowly pulled away from me, her eyes puffy.

"What should I do so he'd notice me?"

I gritted my teeth and flicked her forehead.

"That hurts!" she shrieked, rubbing her forehead.

"There's nothing you can do, okay? He's the one with the problem," I answered impatiently. "Besides, there are way too many guys out there. One of them would surely like you back."

She sniffled. I removed her eyeglasses so I could wipe her tears away.

"He might avoid me now, Angelo. I'm so stupid."

I put her glasses back as I cringed.

"Don't worry about him, okay? Put yourself first," I hissed. "He won't do that. Seth isn't like that."

She adjusted her glasses as she lowered her gaze. I heaved a sigh.

"Promise me that you won't do anything stupid, okay?"

She fiddled with her sleeves quietly.

"CJ..."

CJ nodded.

"Do you really think someone out there would like me back?"

I cleared my throat. "O-Of course."

I patted her head. "Don't cry."

CJ suddenly embraced me again, making my heart skip a beat.

"W-What are you--"

"Thank you, Angelo."

CJ'S POV:

I calmed down after a few minutes. We sat down on the bench, and I stopped crying thanks to Angelo. My eyes stayed puffy, though.

"I'll get you water," he said, but I grabbed his hand to stop him from going.

"No, I'm okay. Stay with me."

He let out a deep breath. We stayed silent, with me holding his hand.

Angelo is right. This is my first heartbreak so it hurts this much. It probably won't be the last, but that's still okay. I'm young. I'll meet somebody else who will reciprocate my feelings.

I let out a deep breath.

"What?"

"I won't cry over him again."

He put his hand on top of mine. "I doubt it."

"I promise, Angelo. If I cry again, you can flick my forehead," I uttered. "I don't want to cry anymore. It's my fault. I was stupid. I shouldn't have confessed my feelings."

"What do you mean? You were... Brave. I didn't want you to do it because I was afraid this was going to happen... But you still did it. And it was brave. You weren't stupid."

I forced a smile. "But look at me, Angelo. I'm too... Average. I'm no match for him."

He let go of my hand, wincing. "Can you stop self-pitying?"

I shrugged.

"Anyway... Thank you, Angelo."

Angelo stared down his feet.

"CJ..."

"How about coming with me to the school dance?"

"Ha?"

"Tonight... There will be a dance. I want you to come with me."

I gaped. "Right! The dance! I totally forgot. I don't have anything to wear."

"Work something out with Sofia. I'm sure she'll have something. That's her thing."

I blew out of my cheeks. "I'm not sure I should..."

"Just come with me," Angelo pleaded. As usual, I couldn't resist him.

I nodded timidly. "Okay."

He grinned. "Should I pick you up?"

"Nope, I'll meet you here."

"Okay."

Angelo reached out again to stroke my hair gently.

I'm glad he's here.

Angelo wanted to accompany me the entire day, but I decided that I needed some time alone. I walked around the school again to check out booths. Some students encouraged me to participate. I said no and left immediately.

Sofia texted me, asking if I was ready for the dance later. When I told her no, she became excited. Angelo was right. Sofia did have a thing for makeovers. We planned to meet after an hour.

I reached the freshman year booths. They had a jail booth and some thrift shops were also open.

I saw a bracelet being sold at the shop, reminding me of the friendship bracelet I made for me and Angelo. I still have mine hidden in my jewelry box. I wonder if he still has his...

A flush crossed my cheeks. Even though Angelo says that he doesn't care about me anymore, what he's done for me today showed that he still thinks of me as a friend.

It's okay. We can take it slow.

I arrived at the school quadrangle where more booths by the elementary department were put up.

I was feeling better, temporarily forgetting that my heart was just broken an hour ago.

But I saw Seth. And then I fell apart again.

He was holding hands with a different girl. Not with Jessa, but with someone else.

A lump formed in my throat. I trembled as I turned around and ran to the corner where I could hide and be alone.

I can't cry. I promised Angelo that I wouldn't cry.

But I broke the promise. A teardrop fell from my left eye.

"No... I can't..." I said, slapping a hand over my mouth to muffle my cry. My tears continued streaming down my face.

He rejected me only an hour ago. I deserve to cut myself some slack.

I'll just cry this out and then I'll stop.

I forced a laughter as I crouched on the floor, burying my face on my knees.

"Don't sit on the floor."

I reluctantly lifted my head. Angelo gritted his teeth.

I immediately got up. "Angelo..."

"I knew it. You saw him, didn't you?"

I nodded, wiping my tears again. "I'm sorry. I couldn't help it."

Angelo extended his hand and patted my head gently.

"Let it all out... I'll be right here," he murmured kindly. "It will take a while, CJ. It's not that easy to forget."

Angelo loomed closer and allowed me to lean my head on his chest. And then I burst out crying again.

"I just... I like him so much..."

"I know..."

Today, I got my heart broken--twice.

Angelo led me out of the quadrangle. We sat on a bench near the elementary school building. I've stopped crying, my eyes feeling even heavier.

"Are you okay?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't think I am, Angelo."

"I hate it when you cry."

I bit my lower lip guiltily. "I'm sorry. I know that I'm being childish. I just don't know if there's someone out there for me."

He winced. "There's someone out there."

Our eyes interlocked with each other.

"Angelo?"

He averted his gaze and stood up, checking his watch.

"Let's go. We still have to prepare for the dance."

"I don't want to see Seth, Angelo."

"You said you'll come with me," he retorted, hopeful. "I... I'm trying to reach out to you, CJ."

It's true. This is the first time Angelo is actually trying to make things better between us. Maybe I should focus on what's in front of me.

I heaved a sigh.

"Okay, Angelo. I'll be there."

I met with Sofia at the mall that afternoon. We had three hours left to prepare. I was skeptical unlike Sofia who was beaming the entire time.

"I'm so happy you asked me to help you out!" she shrieked. She grabbed my hand and pulled me into a store.

I merely followed Sofia around, impressed at the store's interior. The price point was higher than what I expected, though I didn't mind. I wanted to look good for that night.

Sofia handed me three dresses. I entered the fitting room right away. I tried the white one first and liked it, but she said it looked similar to what I wore at Myka's birthday. I grimaced as I recalled how she humiliated me. Sofia also said that it seemed too tight. When I tried the yellow dress, she said it was too conservative. It reached up to my ankles and also had long-sleeves. I agreed with her.

The last one I tried on was a red one.

"Turn around," Sofia said.

I did as I was told and she fixed the black ribbon in the back. I whirled around to face her again.

"You look great!"

The red dress was a tube-type that extended up to my knees. It looked cute. It was my first time wearing that kind of clothing, so I was a little shy. I wasn't sure if it actually suited me.

"Are you sure?" I asked timidly.

"Yes, I am sure! We'll just put some makeup on you and you'll look dazzling! I wish you could take your glasses off."

"I can't. We'll visit the doctor tomorrow, but tonight, I can't."

Sofia gave a dismissive wave of her hand. "Oh well, it's fine. You will still look great."

"Where are we going next?" I asked as we exited the store.

"We have to buy shoes, then we'll go get our hair and makeup fixed."

"But we only have two hours left."

She giggled. "The guys can wait. Besides, pretty girls always arrive late!"

Sofia already had a dress so she only purchased shoes with me. Her dress was silver so she matched it with a pair of silver stilettos. I got myself a pair of black pumps.

Afterward, we headed to the salon with only an hour and a half left.

ANGELO'S POV:

Seth and Jason were inside my room, getting ready for the dance. Seth seemed a little off, as if he was thinking about something deep. I got the urge to talk to him about what happened between him and CJ; however, I decided to stay quiet.

I can't confront him.

Seth was just being Seth.

"Hey, Seth. What's up?" Jason asked, combing his long hair.

"What? Nothing," Seth answered casually, then he leaned on my bed frame. He shot me a casual look.

We stared at each other for a few seconds before I decided to break the silence.

"What is it?" I asked, feigning ignorance.

He cleared his throat. "Nothing."

"Does the red necktie work?" I asked. I was wearing an all-black outfit.

"Yeah," he answered.

I looked away and fixed my necktie, stealing glances at him. Seth was just staring into space.

What's he thinking about?

SETH'S POV:

I admit that I was still bothered about what happened between me and CJ. I was feeling guilty because I think I might have led her on. I wasn't careful. I talked to her like how I would normally talk to girls.

But this is actually the first time that I felt bad. Because I know that she cried over me. Because I know that her feelings are sincere unlike the girls I used to date. Most of them only wanted to brag that they were seeing me. Nothing more.

I glanced at Angelo who was laughing with Jason.

And maybe it troubles me because she is Angelo's first love.

I let out a sharp breath. I'm so stupid.

I didn't want to hurt her. I want our relationship to be the same, though I'm unsure if she will still talk to me. I'm also afraid of what Angelo would do if he learns about what happened.

I caught Angelo looking at me. He tilted his head to the side. I forced a smile.

I hope CJ's okay.

CJ'S POV:

It took the artists two hours to finish fixing our hair and makeup. We got our toenails and fingernails painted as well.

When I finally saw myself in the mirror, I was shocked.

My bangs were neatly tucked in with hairpins, so despite wearing glasses, my face was fully exposed.

And I looked... Different.

Sofia chuckled. She looked so beautiful as well. My heart pounded.

"Do... Do I look okay?" I asked, chin dipped down.

"Raise your head, CJ! You're pretty!"

The ladies who helped us agreed and cheered me on. Confidence swirled inside of me.

"Thank you, Sofia."

Sofia hooked her arm on mine. "It's all you, silly!"

ANGELO'S POV:

The dance started 30 minutes ago, but I couldn't find CJ anywhere. I looked around the auditorium, occasionally stopping to talk to a few people, but I still failed. She never responded to my texts.

I clicked my tongue. Maybe she changed her mind.

"Are you looking for someone?"

It was Seth.

"Yes."

"CJ?"

"Yeah. She's my date," I replied nonchalantly.

Seth's lips pressed into a thin line as he nodded. "What about Myka?"

"I ended it. I don't want to deal with her anymore."

Seth poked a tongue on his cheek and asked, "Would CJ just be an ex to you?"

I was taken aback, but I still replied as casually as I could. "Why are you asking?"

Seth jammed his hands into his pockets, averting his gaze. I've never seen him like this before. And I'm not... Fond of his reaction,

"Who's your date?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't have anyone for now."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Why? That's unlike you."

All of a sudden, we heard whispers from the people around us. Everyone was looking at the door. Seth and I turned around.

I slowly made my way through the crowd.

Then I stopped as soon as I saw her.

Her hair was curled, and she was wearing the most gorgeous dress I've ever seen. She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, her eyes on the floor.

A smile crossed my lips.

She looked so... Beautiful.

"CJ!" I called.

CJ's eyes widened as she looked for me, and she seemed so delighted that I was there. My heart jumped when our gazes met.

Even with her glasses on, her eyes sparkled. No matter how much she says that she's too ordinary, CJ will always be beautiful to me.

I paced toward her, ignoring all the people surrounding us. I extended my hand to her as soon as we were only a meter apart.

"Shall we?"

She smiled at me then nodded.

And I just fell in love with her even more.