Chapter Fourty-Three:

"Maddie, open the fucking door!" He starts pounding on it but I don't answer, instead I go to open the window, and sit on the roof. I let out a deep breathe collecting my thoughts. I'm not even mad or embarrassed about what I did in front of everyone, I could give less of a fuck really. I'm just mad, after everything he is still trying to take care of me. Why can't he just leave me alone? Let Griffin do it. I much rather have him right now, not my psychotic ex boyfriend.

"I will kick it down! I don't give a fuck if it's Griffin's house!" Like I guessed.

"I swear if you kick down the door, I will jump off the roof and I'm pretty high up!"

"Are you fucking crazy?!" He yells.

"Oh yeah if you call me one more thing, I will jump off and I'm pretty tempted right now... I've always been a risk taker." He goes quiet for a moment and I lay on the flat part of the roof and look up at the stars.

"You're on the roof, you said?"

"No I'm on a freaking skyscraper." I say sarcastically and he goes quiet once again and I go back to admiring the sky. It's so beautiful from up here, I wish I could do this from my roof. Being up here, staring at the darkness everything seems so simple and all my stress and anger seems to drift away. I don't know what I could have done differently to avoid this, I asked him for space... I didn't assume that meant he would be with someone else. The girl doesn't even fucking speak up for herself! I pushed her in a pool and she said nothing, I wonder if I shot her in the leg would she do the same thing? She probably wouldn't even scream.

I hear a window slide open and I look up,

"What are you doing?" I ask.

"Well if I asked to come through Griffin's window, you would probably jump off so I guess his brother's window is the next best thing."

"Hm... I didn't even know Griffin had a brother."

"Yeah, he lives in Canada now, has a wife and a kid too. I guess he likes the maple syrup." He jokes.

"Ha. Ha. Ha." I fake laugh. He lays beside me,.

"So what are we looking at?" He asks.

"The stars." I stay calm but still keep the talking to a minimum.

"You're not going to push me off? Yell at me to get away from you?" He asks.

"Nope, it's not worth it... and I'd rather stare at the stars. What about you? You're not going yell at me for pushing you in the water and making a fool at out of you?" I tap my fingers on my legs.

"I'd rather admire the stars too, I guess." I look over at him without turning my face but then quickly go back to looking at the stars,

"It really wasn't how it looked, you know. I thought you didn't want me anymore and I was trying to get over it by I guess finding another "victim". I shouldn't have but sex always seems to help, even though I didn't sleep with her yet."

"What made you think that?"

"Leandro stopped by and told me that you told him that you were done with me and just wanted to give me false hope so that I feel the way you felt when I broke up with you. That you knew the whole time that you didn't want me back and you were basically just fucking with me." What? How does he even know went down between us that night... Angelica. That girl really needs to stop telling my business to Leandro but also he shouldn't be lying because he doesn't like something.

"It's not true Gabriel... he lied to you and the fact you believed it is stupid. He did it because he doesn't think your good for me and he probably has a point but still."

"So you weren't fucking with me?" He asks. His voice sounds innocent, full of hope.

"Of course not, idiot. Why would I do that to you?" I say.

"I'm going to kill that fucker."

"No... I'll deal with Leandro." That boy is going to wish he didn't know me I swear... who is he to mess with my relationship with Gabriel that has nothing to do with him.

"So basically all of that screaming and pool pushing was for nothing?"

"Yeah I guess it was." I start to laugh and he joins in,

"We really are crazy when we fight... I mean I literally said I was going to film a sex tape with Liam... you know I would never do that right?" I look over at him and he has a slight smile on his face,

"Yeah I know and I love the crazy... crazy just shows how much we really care and love each other." He shows off his perfect white teeth with a rare but nice bright smile, "And God, I love you Maddie."

"I know you do... that star kind of looks like you." I point up at the big star.

"Yeah...I don't see it."

"I may be hallucinating... I drank a variety of different types of alcohol tonight. One that was from the bottle." He starts to laugh at me but then he goes quiet.

"One day, when I die I want to become a star. Like in Princess and the frog. It must be nice, being able to see everything from a far distance and I have very good vision so maybe I'll be able to watch over people and stuff." I say.

"I rather not talk about you dying." I start to laugh,

"Sorry... but If I go first i'll make sure to save a space beside me, exactly like the movie."

"Maddie, I mean it. Besides, I'm almost sure I will go before you and I'll make sure of it."

"Yeah, Yeah you can't control death, you're not some twisted version of God." He doesn't answer me, instead continues to stare up and I do the same. I wonder if I can make some sort of arrangement to become a star when I die... I doubt it's possible. Maybe if I pray about it a couple dozen times. I want to be an important star though, like one someone will study one day... I'm thinking way too deeply into this.

"Maddie?" He calls out, like he is making sure I am still there.

"Yes Gabriel?"

"Do you love me? Because if you don't tell me now because I can't do this if you don't." I hear the heartbreak in his voice like he expects me to say no, I look over to him and place my hand on his cheek,

"Of course I love you Gabriel. It's impossible for me not to." I give him a delicate kiss on his lips and he places one on my forehead.

"I think people are staring at us." He says.

"Well we are laying down on a roof after fighting." I peek down where all our friends are trying to see us,

"I think they think were insane."

"Well they're not wrong." He laughs and I nudge him.

"The Chancellor from Parsons wants to meet with me sometime this month... you were the first person I wanted to tell when she emailed me." I admit.

"That's great... I'm happy for you. You deserve it."

"When you get in, which you will. I'll be there to help you move and we can take turns visiting." I know he knows that's what I wanted to hear and I don't even care,

"Really? That makes me really happy... it seems like we solved a lot of issues today." I smile.

"Well don't be too happy, tomorrow is new day with probably a lot more issues." He jokes and I laugh.

"That star right there looks a lot like you... I guess I'm hallucinating too." He points up at the same star that I pointed at but I chose not to tell him.