Ch 55 The Tormented

I felt waves gently crashing on me. I felt sand under me. I felt air rolling over me. I felt heat to my right. I felt cold to my left.

I removed my left arm from under the shore sand. I coughed a few times as I stood up. I found vast amounts of trees before me, burning or already burnt. I had no idea where I was or how I got here.

I was in the nude again. I have such a hard time with clothes in this world.

I followed the shoreline. I hoped that I would either find one of the peninsulas that I knew or the mainland with the main path that circles the continent.

I went along my way without a care in the world. My thoughts were focused on the shore. I don't know why I felt so content.

I saw more trees burning. I began to notice that they were not the trees I was used to. Before burning, they were purple and the leaves were glowing pink. I think this is the Faelands.

Why was I here?

My head began to ache. I bent down to one knee.

"Wha... I... Where is Mery? Mery... Mery... MERY!"

I remembered the last time I saw her. I thought she was Inu. Her sister... She had another sist...

Tears began to stream down my face. Delicia was dead. I remember. That bitch killed her...

"Oh god... Delicia, I'm so sorry..."

I sniffled a few more times before I wiped my tears. I felt the effect of disintegration on my hand. I remembered what my tears do. They leave a void wherever they touch.

"What happened? Why is everything on fire?"

I spoke aloud to no one, expecting no immediate answer.

'I can show you.'

That voice came from Rage.

"What? You can... Why? What did you do? Did you do this?"

No response.

"Fine..."

My voice shuddered.

"Sh-show me."

I was terrified at what I would see.

I closed my eyes and saw the world through his. It started from the point of Delicia's neck snapping.

I watched in horror as my view was growing ever higher off the ground. My battle with Y'gdrim was hardly a battle, more like a weak adult playing with a powerful baby.

What set me off was the sight of Delicia's body being shredded. I almost lost the vision of the battle.

I watched an entire village get trampled. I saw a mountain fly. If there were no casualties, that would have been an amazing sight.

The mountain itself was going to land on Skara Magna. I broke the vision as soon as I saw Skara Magna was about to be crushed. So many lives lost. I had to pray that Esther and Luv were not there.

"What have I done?"

'Lake, I...'

Rage tried to speak.

"ALL OF YOU, SHUT UP! LEAVE ME ALONE!"

My knees dug into the sand along the shore and I fell forward. My arms were nearly crushing my stomach in pain. The thought of being responsible for so many lost lives.

I'm a monster.

...

Several hours passed as I wallowed in my own thoughts.

I felt lifeless. I felt empty and numb. If I told Sophie and Riksa about what happened... Would they ever take me back? Would I be shunned? Would they fear me?

Would they call me a monster, too?

I dreaded the thought of going back to them. I had no direction. Where would I go? Is there someone that I could confide in? I'm near Lak'Tambu. Atouk? He followed me through thick and thin.

My mind recalled the other residents in the city. Delicia's family. I failed Mery already, now Delicia? How could I face them again?

Ula Thyfe was not an option. Estheria was my only real contact there. If she was still alive. I was hopeful for her. Skara Magna was not friendly to outsiders, only Juiyo was. Luv though... Could she have gone there for some reason? Could I have killed Esther's lover?

My mind was ripe with negative thoughts. My body was useless in this state. How could I ever think of going on at this rate?

I came across another thought that hurt even more. Of all the people that died... I can never join them. I can never see Mery in the afterlife. I can't ask for forgiveness from all the souls that I ended too soon.

My heart felt like it was breaking, healing and breaking all over again. I can't die.

For the first time in my life, I wanted to die. I wanted to end it. My mind was too broken to move forward. I would rather join the masses than live and be hated for what I have done.

These roundabout thoughts were pointless. Why beg for something that I could never have?

My mind began rationalizing. It was a strength of mine. I tend to keep my cool with a rational mind. Aside from patience, I think it is one of my primary positive attributes.

Even so, rationalizations can't make my pain go away.

I made a massive effort to stand up. I took step after step along the coast. I still had no destination in mind. I just felt like I had to move before my mind broke beyond repair.

I focused my mind on each step. The thought of anything else was put aside.

Step.

Step.

Step.

I did this for what felt like hours.

Something in my vision moved. I was too focused on moving to care what it was. It could be a massive hungry beast for all I cared.

"Gods! Another survivor! OVER HERE!"

The being spoke but I did not hear a word. I could not speak. It would distract me from my steps. The being came close and said more words that were lost on my ears.

"A human? How did you get all the way out here? Come, we will take you somewhere sa..."

I felt something grasp my arm. I pulled away.

"Please, you need help. We just want to help."

"Just let him die. He looks more lost than a snowflake in a desert."

I heard a word that brought me back to reality.

"DIE?"

My breathing became erratic at hearing the word.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

I let out the last of my breath before I passed out.

There were no dreams. There was no darkness. I still felt the pain in my heart. The worry in my mind.

I awoke on a cart filled with hay. A horse was nearby and chewing away at my temporary bed. It was dark and cold out. Someone had put a blanket over me.

I looked around at the tiny village that was now overpopulated with displaced individuals and families. Most of the inhabitants were fairies and fae-kin. This was the first time seeing the fae. They were humanoid in shape and size like a human but, they had fairy wings and had a few different shades of skin than humans. Some blue, others green and several colors in-between.

There were only a few fairies. I had seen one in the arena soup in Skara Magna...

"Skar..."

My head began to pound at the thought of the place that was surely destroyed. The pain was coming back again.

It was getting hard to hold back my Void of Sorrow. I had to leave.

This was my new goal.

Get away from others.

I was lucky that no one was paying attention to me. I brought the blanket to cover my nudity.

I could hear the ocean nearby. I began following the coast again. I knew which way the mainland was on the count of the leftovers from the removed mountain. I was headed south.

I stayed in the woods between the village and the coast. Who knows if someone was still searching the beaches. I was making good time, now that I had a goal. I didn't want anyone else to get hurt. The best way to do that is to get away from everyone...

"Everyone?"

I whispered.

Sophie... The thought of going back to her made me more scared than anything.

The fear of her reaction to what I've done. The fear that I may accidentally hurt her if I stay near her. My power was no joke. It was dangerous.

Only now does it make sense. The reactions I first got in Ula Thyfe. They knew what could happen. I was blissfully ignorant.

I felt I was far enough from the village that I could once again traverse the soft sands of the beach. It was much more distracting than the leaf-covered forest floor.

I spent the entire night and the following day walking along the shores. I managed to reach the mainland. The primary path should be within an hour's walk.

Do I want to go to the path though? I remembered the carriages I saw on the path when I went to Bastion. Then I remembered the sight I saw on the way to the Faelands.

Bastion was under siege.

If my powers went berserk there...

No. Prisoners could be hurt too.

...

What choice do I have? Lak'Tambu is the other direction. I can't face them.

I made up my mind and began to travel in the southeastern direction of the path.

As I had guessed, it took only an hour to get to the path. I decided to stay just off the path so that I could hide if anyone got close.

I had passed the split in the path that would go to Bastion. The smoke had calmed down, however... The smoke over in the Faelands could still be seen from here. The fires were probably still raging on.

"Fuck... I'm so sorry."

I felt my lips tremble as I said it. I turned my back to the Faelands and continued on.

This next area is uncharted territory for me.

The Demonic Tribelands.

Some unknown force is taking passersby and converting them into "demons" for a legion, of sorts.

I kept my eyes peeled just in case. I also crossed the path to the inland side, just in case.

My walk continued onward without interruptions. I began to lose myself in my thoughts again.

As I calmed down more, I was able to think more clearly. I had decided that I would try to find someplace where I won't be a burden on the world. I also don't want to just abandon Sophie and Riksa.

I would tell them my thoughts... After I tell them the truth about what happened. If they want to follow me to the ends of the earth at that point, I would not stop them. I want to be able to give them closure if they decide that I am not worth staying by.

My goal has not changed, just a slight detour.

I was right across from the Demonic Tribelands now. There were patrols across the path every few yards. Every one of them seemed to be an orc.

Most orcs seemed to have green, tan-ish brown, or orange coloring. Like leaves on trees between spring and autumn.

They were usually burley. Not over the top like trolls and lizard-people but, they tend to have some decent muscle. The average height was about six or seven feet.

I sunk deeper into the forest to stay out of sight. That was a mistake.

"HEY! I GOT ONE!"

One of them found me. I could feel my legs begin to tense up before I started to run. It was already too late. I heard a strange sound. I looked to my left just in time to see a spear tip come straight at my face.

The world went black.

...

"Stupid humans. I thought the morcs got them all rounded up. How did this one escape?"

"They are like rats. Leave them alone long enough and they breed in the strangest places. Maybe this one was a stray."

I could hear two deep, slightly raspy voices conversing. I felt my body moving. Something soft was under me. I felt around with my fingers.

I felt... fingers...

I opened my eyes in alarm. I took a quick glance around. Two orc guards were on large lizard mounts leading the open wagon that I was on. I was surrounded by bodies. Dead humans of all ages and sizes.

They got in a headshot on me and thought I was dead. I was just more meat on the wagon.

Maybe they would take me to a mass grave and I could get away from there. I laid back down and closed my eyes again.

"Did you see something move?"

"Hah. Getting spooked by the dead? Come on. How did you ever get this job with a weak soul like that?"

"No, I don't spook. I really thought I saw movement."

I stopped breathing the moment I shut my eyes again. I hope he does not wise up to my non-existent head wound.

I overheard them talk about how the orcish army had removed the demons and calmed this land for their own. They had plans to take over the entire continent. Mostly from below. That was how they got into Bastion. They dug in from underneath. The humans never suspected anything until it was too late.

The guards chatted away for maybe another fifteen minutes before I started hearing more voices all around me. Some were heavy like the two in front, others were meek and pitiful. I opened one eye just enough to see morcs and orcs working together. I had to guess the meek voices were the morcs.

The wagon stopped.

"More meat? Put it over there with the others."

"Yes, commander."

The wagon began to move.

"Wait."

The wagon stopped again almost instantly.

"This one, It's whole. What did it die of?"

"Whole? There should be no... What? I hit this human in the head with this."

"Obviously not. There are no wounds to indicate that."

"I saw him get hit too. There is no way..."

They caught on. I nonchalantly sat up and heard many gasps around me. I opened my eyes to many orcs and morcs surrounding me.

I hopped down and let out a sigh.

"Bad luck... You just happened upon th..."

"The user of the potion of Rage."

I was in shock at this orc's response. Most people are afraid of me. He seemed so, matter of fact, about it.

"If you got him once, you can get him again."

I should have bailed as soon as I was healed up.

I tried to concentrate on my anger. I imagined all the humans that died because of them. I remembered the fury I had against the witch for killing Delicia. But... my powers. I can't bring them out and Mother's power isn't responding.

"Why?"

"Look! He is scared. This will be easy."

I racked my brain for a reason... I remembered. I told them to shut up and go away. Did they abandon me? Am I truly alone now?

I relaxed my body. If I didn't have my powers, these orcs could take me out with ease. These numbers around me would make sure of that.

The orc in front of me had a short sword. I watched him lunge at me. As much as I felt like giving up, I was not about to go out without a fight. I dipped low and landed a crotch shot on the unsuspecting orc. He doubled over in pain.

I got hit in the back of the head. My world began to spin and I lost balance. I fell to my knees and felt another blow to my head. I was not out all the way. I could still hear the conversations around me.

"This human can regenerate from any wound. He is dangerous. We got lucky that he was so weak. The best way to incapacitate him is to cause major damage to the head and prevent the head from healing."

"Prevent it? How?"

"Jam 'this' into his head from the front."

I felt my body get turned over. I was on my back now.

"After you do that, have a spelunking team take him to the lowest levels and..."

The words were drowned out by the sound of my skull cracking under intense pressure.

Once more, I blacked out.