Not Desperate!

London was woken by the sound of her phone ringing, as she shuffles through her sheets to find it, much out of fright than actually haste to get it, "damn it!", "where the fuck are you" she yells through clenched teeth, as she realizes that's trapped in her pillowcase.

"Hi mom, what's up?" she answers.

"Well, hello darling, I am just making the final adjustments to the venue and thought I might run the color scheme by you. So it's black, red, and purple, just like you wanted, "I don't know how they're gonna make that come together" she murmurs under her breath as if I can't hear her.

Rolling my eyes I said, "Mom, it's my party remember"? and thank you, I love you, talk to you later I said as I cut her off without finishing the conversation.

I love my mom but sometimes she could be a bit 'much' as I likely put it. I finally began to breathe and walked into my bathroom to take a shower as my phone starts vibrating on the counter, I didn't even realize I had bought it with me. I rinsed my mouth out, rub my teeth with my fingers, and shone them. My phone rang again and I looked over picking it up this time.

"Scott's" name pop's up, oh my God! Can't I get a break, all this stress in one morning, uugghh I said, fighting with my own demons if I should answer or just let it ring........ uugghh he's so damn annoying, well maybe it's important, shit!, "damn it", "hello I murmured, as he was more excited to talk to me than I was about talking to him, "hey babe, so am I going as your date tonight or?.......... "Scott we've had this conversation over a million times, I said rolling my eyes, you're not my date, and for Christ will you stop calling me babe. If you haven't realized we're not together anymore, it's been six months, get over it I screamed, regretting it instantly, I'm sorry I said, I'm just really stressed out with this party and all, as he stops me and ensures I know it's ok. "Don't worry about it, he says acting as if I didn't hurt his feelings, I exhale heavily through my mouth and apologize again.

I just wasn't feeling all chirpy and happy and I didn't even know why, blame on my bipolar ways I guess. I took a hot bath and tied my hair in a messy bun as I usually do when I'm not in the mood. I hate having my hair sleek, I think it kills the whole vibe of being 'lit' or the feel of being drop-dead ass sexy, like seriously....... Now I'm starting to feel like the normal me, "yesssss', I don't know what pissed on me in my bed last night but I sure ain't keeping that attitude", I thought to myself, as I looked at my appearance in the mirror and made my way through the door and into the streets.

Getting waved at and girl as much as boys being "star-struck" I gave a few autographs and a few pics that was awesome for me, I love meeting people especially my fans, they sometimes don't even know I'm the one that's grateful for them. as it got too crowded, my car pulled up and my bodyguards escorted me inside. "Wow, well that was nice", said Austin, as we drove off. He's so freaking handsome, he had short blonde hair, green eyes, and a smile that would melt even an "ice queen's" heart, literally. This guy was freaking gorgeous I don't know if Alex and Car did this on purpose getting me this beauty of a man as my PBG ( personal bodyguard) but boy this guy was omg......

"My friends" believe he's totally head over heels for me, and with my chocolate skin, his green eyes, and blonde hair, we'd make a good-looking couple and also some good-looking babies, I slightly smiled at the thought of how crazy my friends are and how much I really love them. But hey they may be right, right? I laughed at my own thoughts cracking myself up. I seriously need to get a life and stop living inside my head all the time.

There were Alex, Car, and Bianca. Car is a model and had a hugely successful line of cosmetics and is dating Erik, Erik's a rapper and they've been together for 2 years. Alex is a fashion designer and was a part of her family business, she's been dating Mason who was a professional soccer player, they've been dating for the past year and they've literally one of the best couples. Bianca was my brother's girlfriend and one of the most successful artists/designers throughout the states. She and my brother have been together for 3 years and counting. Let's just say I need to get on board with everyone else. My life was a total mess romantically and everyone seems to want to set me up with John, Jerry, and all his friends. God! Like I'm ever gonna be that desperate. I'm younger than most of these people by far and don't need to be hitched on anyone as if time was running out on me. I had a great career, awesome friends, and family and that's all anyone could ask for. Of course, I missed being in love, all head over heels, and making an ass of myself in front of, someone who appreciates my dorky, silly, and craziness.

But I know that one day that will happen to me! maybe not today or tomorrow but one day it will. Will it be with Scott, definitely not! But I know it will be with someone who treats me the way I want to be treated and like the queen that I am and I will not settle for less. Never! And back to reality in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1......