zigginah

Tear-stained cheeks, my mascara was now an ugly smudge after being ruined with all the crying I had been doing for the past hour. I could not recognize myself as I looked through the mirror. The more I stared at myself the more the tears. I could hear them in the next room. Their moans enraged me and made me feel like throwing up. I retched but nothing came out. 

Disgust is what I felt.


My life had turned out to be a chaotic mess and I wondered what I had done to deserve all that. I was a good person or so I believed.

I smiled through the pain and thought to myself that everything was going to be okay. I did not believe that myself but I had to tell myself to keep going or I would be stuck in a loop with my past trying to set myself free...

DAWN.

The cold breeze hit my skin and it felt do good. The silence was so deafening. I hugged by body tighter and stared into the horizon getting lost in it. My mind was clear and for once I was not thinking of anything. Normal my mind would be jammed with a thousand thoughts like a jungle.

As I say in that cafe all I could think about was one thing. He had been distant lately and I did not know what to think of it. I could not stop myself from thinking . What if he did not like me anymore. The thought itself brought tears to my eyes and I pushed the thought away to stop myself from having a breakdown in the middle of a cafe.

"Are you okay ,you look like something is a miss?"asks Camilla.

"Yeah am fine",I say as I force myself to smile.

"Ella I know you,I know you don't trust me but you can talk to me about anything you know that right?"she asks.

"Yeah ",I say as I take a deep breath.

Greatest Sin