Chapter 9

Hi guys! There will be mentions of suicide here so please skip if you don't like it, I wish for my readers to be in good mental health when reading. ^^

Marcel's POV

(bold is Kyrion and underline is Marcel)

I woke up with the sun shining into my eyes while sweating excessively due to another bad dream.

Those damned nightmares, it's like fate knows how I'm afraid of approaching this Hui Zhong mate of ours and mocking my paranoia.

I went into the bathroom and did a quick shower and change before heading to the kitchen to grab some coffee and back to the office while doing a quick clean-up session of my gloriously messy desk.

Just as was about to complete my quick spring-cleaning session, Kyrion interrupted my thoughts with a huff and replied quietly to my earlier thoughts.

'Well, if you'd try giving her chance to socialise with you I'm sure it will help with you slowly healing yourself mentally and emotionally. But ultimately it's your choice Marcel, as your wolf I can only do so much as to advise you.'

I rolled my eyes as I knew he's right, but to be able to release that pain? Its unthinkable that I would be able to accept another human but if the Goddess saw fit then it must mean something right?

I hope I won't make a mistake by opening up and accepting her, I should first send Eli or someone to keep an eye on her to learn more about her but how will I explain that to them especially Eli? He'd pester me to no end about why specifically her, especially since she's a human, so I think I should send Will since he's more quiet and reserved than the other two and won't pester me about it, that's it! I've found a solution.

'Yes you did and congratulations Marcel, now I want to ask you let me take control to meet her once a week so that I can get to know her too, she probably felt the mate sparks fly and could have figured things out already.

By letting me have control will bring two benefits to us, them being 1: We can learn about her which will aid in your emotional recovery and 2: You can take a well deserved break while I take charge and you rest. How does that sound?'

'I hate to admit it but you're right on this one Kyrion, I'll let you take control after I brief the three musketeers when we arrive next week alright? Then you'll be able to try to contact her as you will.'

I made no attempt to hide the small amount of excitement that I had when we would meet our mate after we returned back from the party. Although I had my reservations about meeting other's , especially humans, I was willing to give her a chance and a break for the both of us.

I called in the Will, Howard and Eli or as I call them, the three musketeers, into my office and handed them a stack of files before settling into my armchair and glanced at them as I sipped my coffee.

"Okay so Kyrion and I had a chat earlier and we both agreed that I need a break both physically and mentally. Just like Eli said, I think this break will help me emotionally so Kyrion will be taking over while you balance the workload alright?"

They all nodded with smiles and it dawned on me how hard I was working at 28 for a single Alpha that had no Luna.

"Well that's great to hear Marcel! Don't you worry about us three, we'll handle the duties fine and all ya need to do is just enjoy yourself at the party while discussing the rogue issue alright?"

I nodded while sighing as I rubbed my temples with my eyes closed, the fact that I saw my mate and felt those sparks were giving me another headache.

"Marcel? Do you need the pack doctor to give some pain killers?" Eli asked with an eyebrow raised.

I shook my head as I downed my coffee instantly and waved them out, then as they were leaving I suddenly remembered the agreement with Kyrion and mind-linked Will. 'Will, can you come in alone after the other two leave the packhouse later? They cannot know about this as this is only meant for your ears.'

'Yes of course Alpha, I fully understand your instructions. I will come back in an hour's time then, with food? I can bring some stuff for that headache of yours too.'

'Alright then, I'll see you then and yes, please bring some soup or stew for me thanks.'

I replied him as he left with the other two, I honestly wondered if I was the cold one or him since he only showed his affections for his mate and I on the other hand, just shut my emotions off after being betrayed by my first mate.

Thinking about it now, I was young and foolish on my part to be so open with that man which caused me to lose my parents to the greed of that asshole Jason Alpha of the nightfall pack. I sighed as I sat down and took out of the last family photo I had and looked at it while thinking about what Jason did those years ago.

I wasn't always this cold but after most of the pack were killed with the betrayal of my first mate, I had shut my emotions and sense of affection away. My first mate who, despite being engaged to me, still collaborated with Jason secretly and even cheated on me with

him.

I lost my sense of emotion and became devoid of affection, it also broke my heart that despite hurting me so much, he let himself be killed to be with Jason when I ripped Jason's head off.

That is something that still haunts me to this day and will probably continue no matter how old I get, this is one reason why I am reluctant to accept our second mate.

However, if the Goddess set me with this woman, I will try my best to open my heart to love her fully.

I know as werewolves we tend to feel a 'pull' towards our mates and believe me when I say I do, because I really do feel it and desire to be fully affectionate and loving with her every hour of the day. However, I just can't bring myself to love her so easily as I did to him that time.

'I know it's difficult, I also find it difficult to accept our mate even though I do wish for her embrace in our arms ever so often Marcel. Once you let me out I'll do my best to heal us well and learn about our mate no? We agreed to this so relax for once Marcel, you have been doing your best as alpha for a long time already.'

'Alright , alright Kyrion you win this round. Just stop nagging at me already. The sparks gave me a headache and you aren't helping with your nagging either.'

Kyrion chuckled before retreating back in my mind, I swear sometimes I wonder why on earth the Goddess had put him as my wolf and not an obedient one who won't jam me back every 5 minutes. I sighed and closed my eyes to try to lessen the headache just as Will came back in with a bowl of soup and ginger tea in a big mug before setting it on my desk and sitting in front of me.

"So what is the matter Alpha? Did something serious happen earlier today?" He asked while raising his eyebrow as he sat down while looking at me, his expression remaining stoic but his eyes displaying some form of concern within him somewhere.

I sighed as I sipped the ginger tea he brought before setting the cup down and looking out the window and speaking while running my fingers through my hair. "Its regarding something important, I want you to go find and keep an eye on this woman for me, here's the file for you to learn what you need to know about her. You will be sent to find her after the new years, I want you to not only keep an eye from a distance but also befriend her while you're at it to get to know her, is that clear?"

He nodded as he noted down my instructions in the file with a puzzled look before raising his eyebrow and asking me in a worried tone , "Alpha I hope you don't mind me asking why though, not that I am not willing but I'm just curious why specifically this human who has nearly nothing about her in the file except her basic information. Not forgetting you only asked me to do it instead of Eli or Howard along with me."

"Well, there's something about her that I need to check to ensure she is not a threat to either pack especially with such a happy occasion looming up I will not take such chances. As to why I only asked you, is so that Eli doesn't do anything dumb or jump to conclusions without thinking straight, not that he is but still, you get my point. " I lied easily with a chuckle as I continued to sip the tea without giving any eye contact to prevent him from getting suspicious about why I was so secretive with this assignment.

"Alright Alpha, I'll head out and not let the other two know about this assignment then. Take care and call me if you need anything alright?" He said as he got up and nodded before leaving.

I nodded and waved him off before going back to my room to for a quick shower before heading out to have dinner with Eli at the local pub, if it weren't for my trusty desk calendar I'd have forgotten he asked to have a guys night out since he didn't have work tonight after Howard volunteered to stay while we went out.

After getting ready I headed to my car and drove to the pub to see Eli and Mark heavily making out in their parking lot, causing me to gag internally and groan as I got out of my car and cleared my throat to get their attention.

They both blushed as they pulled away and motioned for me to go in, I rolled my eyes and shook my head while we walked in towards our table.

"So what's with the sudden invite to dinner? You have never treated me to things unless you want to tell me something or you got a favour to ask me Eli" I said while rolling my eyes as I sipped my glass of bourbon.

I tried to find any clue on what it could be when Eli cleared his throat with a sheepish look just as the food arrived.

"Well, we're expecting actually and we wanted to tell you first because you're the one who supported our relationship from the very beginning Marcel and we wanted to uh ask you to be the godfather you see."

He said while avoiding my eyes before hugging Mark who was now in tears.

Well Eli wasn't kidding when he said both our pack and I as a whole were the reason Mark couldn't join us at first, I still remembered when they first found each other Mark's pack and family didn't accept it because our pack was still rebuilding and tried to separate them until he nearly killed himself.

In the end, I had to challenge their alpha to let him come be our pack member which I was successful at and they have been together for the past 2 years since then.

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for them but I just can't think positive every time the word 'mate' or the conversation is related to it and Eli must have noticed that because I snapped back to reality to see a puffy-red-eyed Mark and a worried looking Eli waving frantically at my face to get my attention.

"Sorry I zoned out but, congratulations guys. Honestly I'm not surprised but I am surprised why it took so long because you guys go at it like rabbits till I had to sound-proof your room" I said, causing them to blush heavily while I continued to eat my food.

Dinner was pretty uneventful after that ,all of us finishing our meals before going to our cars to drive back to the packhouse. Except that their car broke down, so I volunteered to shift and run back while they drove my car back because Mark couldn't shift when he's pregnant and also because I need some time by myself.

After I arrived back home, I rushed into my room and showered at lightning speed before collapsing into my bed. The assignment that I gave to Will was the one thing giving me a headache right now because I just can't shake the thought

of Hui Zhong, who's now imprinted in my mind off it.

Eventually I just sigh and give up, snuggling into the covers of my bed before dozing off to sleep in the cold winter night.

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