[11] Brewing Angst

(Malory)

After breakfast, Kyle and I head to school. We’re late for being early. Usually we’d have about forty five minutes to settle in before classes, but today we’ve only got thirty-five.

I’m anxious. Kyle rushed us out of the house this morning and I didn’t get a chance to put any makeup on his face.

I grab Kyle by his neckline when we reach the entrance doors and drag him into a corner. We hide.

“Why are you so aggressive?” he asks, still under my grip.

I glare at him and whisper-yell. “You idiot. You can only hide behind your hair for so long. If you hadn’t pushed me out of the house so urgently I would have put some makeup on you.”

He sighs. “If you haven’t already noticed, Lloyd, I’m not one to keep much company. I honestly don’t think people will notice. Especially if I don’t draw attention to it.”

“You know, for someone so smart, you really are very stupid in the area of common sense. You’ve been gone for two weeks. Of course people are going to stare you down like you’re a Nazi.”

I look around at the empty hallway. A student enters and walks right past us. I turn back to Kyle –who I realise I’m still tugging at by his neckline and holding near my face- and I glare at him before letting him go. He straightens his posture and looks down at me.

“What about swimming? You have that later today. And gym? What about when you have to change in front of the guys? Someone is going to notice, Kyle.”

“There’s nothing I can do about any of that, Lloyd,” he tells me frustrated. “Look. I’ll be fine. I’ll just stay low for the while.”

Just then, Mrs Beverly enters the scene and spots us mingling in the corner. She does a double take to confirm that her eyes aren’t lying to her.

“Davidson,” she says, surprised. “It’s good to have you back! Your co-star here told me you were sick.” She raises a brow at him. “Do you have the doctor’s note?”

He carefully shuffles into his book bag and finds it, limiting his movements to keep his hair plastered over his injured face.

Every slight movement of his hair fuels my anxiety.

He finds the note and hands it to her. She reads it and offers him a smile.

“Wonderful,” she says at last. “I’ll let you both off the hook –this time. Have a good day, both of you. And please stay out of trouble.” She walks off, and Kyle and I stare at her until she disappears.

Stay low.

I’m choking on melodramatic laughter.

I hit Kyle on his arm and whisper, gesturing to the path where Mrs Bev was. “See what I mean?” I think about what could have happened if he didn’t have the note, “And jeez, the things I’ve done for you.”

The smug seal smirks at me. “So you’re admitting that you’re not just doing this for yourself?”

I furrow my brows at him and cough out a sarcastic laugh. “Don’t keep your hopes up. Now,” I say, digging into my schoolbag to look for my makeup kit, “Let’s find a place to do this. I may be good with words but I will not be caught giving Kyle Davidson a makeover. I have a reputation to uphold.”

He scoffs. “A reputation. And you say that like I’m forcing you to do this. Just forget it, Lloyd. I’m not going to swimming class this evening, I’ll skip it. Again. And I’ll take it easy in gym. The teachers will be informed, I’m sure, that I’m sick. They won’t make me overexert myself.”

I pause from the shuffling to look at him pointedly. “Oh, and just how are you going to pretend to be sick, Davidson? You suck at acting. I’m pretty sure that little Two-Minute-Broadway you put on for Clark at the guard booth was enough to make him depressed so he just let you think you convinced him.” I lean closer to his face and breathe the word into him. “Pathetic.”

“Just hurry up and do this thing if you’re going to do it. It’s getting late and the school’s going to be flooded with other piss-offs besides you soon,” he argues, defeated.

“What about the gym? Is it empty right now?”

“Never empty on a morning. There’s bound to be a jock or some health and fitness freak in there,” he reminds me.

“The computer lab?”

“Most definitely not,” he argues.

And then it hits me.

“Oh! The art room!”

He opens his mouth to protest but then he actually considers it. He raises a brow at me.

I shrug. “It’ll have a good excuse behind it, too, if anyone walks in. I’ll say I’ve got something to do for my art class and I’m using you as my victim to do the assignment on. It’ll look as though the bruise was done on purpose –with makeup.”

“You have got to be kidding me.”

Without even thinking, I grab his hand and pull him to the art room. I close the door while he takes a seat and then I rush over to him, sitting and shuffling to finally find my makeup kid and begin the cover up process.

“Stay low, my foot! You’re not a very wise genius.” I say as I apply the concealer.

“Oh give me a break, Albert Einstein,” he says, annoyed.

***

(Olivia)

Ron and I arrive just as the bell rings. We walk in together. As always, Malory and Kyle have arrived before us. They’re passionately insulting each other.

Seeing them back at it again –though I don’t encourage the fighting- makes everything feel right with the world again. What’s it been –like…two weeks?

“Mal! Kyle!” I say, running over to them.

Ron approaches Kyle, a blank expression plastered over his face as he finally sees his best friend again. He clears his throat.

“Davidson,” he acknowledges, casually.

Scratching the back of his head nervously, Kyle opens his arms as if to give Ron a hug. “Roomie!”

“I’m tempted by the devil on my right shoulder to punch you in the stomach and then probably break your face right this second, but the angel on my left shoulder says I’ll go to Hell for that.”

Kyle giggles nervously, and I think it’s the first time I’ve ever heard Kyle giggle.

“Missed you too, man,” he says.

Releasing some tension from his shoulder, Ron asks, “Are you feeling better?”

“A bit,” Kyle replies.

Ron squints to look closer at Kyle’s face. “You still look a bit flustered, and ... red in the face... How the hell did you even get so sick?”

“Do you really want to know?” Malory asks, and we all turn to look at her as she explains. “He went to this cafe he usually goes to near his house and ate a bad bowl of fruits. Inadequate Ivan over here didn’t even realise they were bad.”

“But thank God you’re back. I kept your handouts and copied notes for you,” I say.

“Thanks, Prescott,” he says, offering me a small, grateful smile. “Appreciate it.”

Just then, Adrien appears beside me and taps Malory on her shoulder. I glance at Kyle –who looks at the newcomer expressionlessly.

“Adrien! Good morning...” Mal greets.

He smiles at her and turns to me, “Hi, guys.”

“Who are you?” Kyle’s voice appears.

Adrien turns to him, his smile faltering. “The new kid,” he says.

“He’s in our class,” Ron tells him, gesturing to Malory.

“Oh,” Kyle mutters, looking away.

Adrien glances between Ron and Kyle. “So, I finally get to meet the other half of the rivalry.”

Kyle blinks at him three times, raising a brow and looking offended. “I’m sorry, what?”

Adrien points to Malory and then to Kyle with his index saying, “I mean the mini war everyone talks about. The whole school. Between you and Mal.” He wraps an arm over her shoulder.

I feel awkward.

Almost.

Mal?

When did Adrien get to the nickname level of friendship?

Kyle and I both turn to Malory.

“I’m sorry, I... I must be missing something here...” Kyle says, and I silently agree.

“What are you talking about?” She asks, confused.

He furrows his brow at her and continues, “You two have barely known each other two months and you’re already this close? Whoa, Lloyd, you’re quicker than I thought!”

“What?” She exclaims, “What the hell is wrong with you? Don’t try to spite me on this, Davidson. He’s in my class and he’s my friend… unlike you. Oh my god, are you really that petty? Piss off to your classroom or wherever –I don’t particularly care- and go get some reading done for class –you’ve been a two-week wreck and I won’t even bother trying to help you anymore. You’re all better, now, clearly. Everything’s back to the way it was.”

Scoffing, he nods at her and speaks bitterly. “Right. Everything’s exactly the way it was before. Thanks, Lloyd. For sticking your nosy existence in places you didn’t need to be. No need for you to be an aiding shadow anymore.”

Malory goes silent; her face becoming less tense by the second. Kyle gently hits Ron, gesturing for them to leave. Ron studies Malory, Adrien and me before walking off to catch up to Kyle.

“What was that about?” I ask her.

Baffled, she doesn’t even turn to me. “I have absolutely no idea.”

***

(Malory)

It’s Tuesday. I’m walking to the literacy room with a handful of rolled up charts. I have a bit of setting up to do there before the Youth for Animal Rights Club has their debate this evening.

It’s still early –only minutes past seven- and I spot Adrien in the distance, jogging on the field.

I pause and decide that two minutes of talking wouldn’t hurt. I walk towards him.

At the opposite end of the field, he spots me and waves with a big smile. It’s impossible for me to wave back because my hands are full, but I hurry towards him. We sit on the bleachers. He drinks some water out of his big bottle and then pours some over his head and on his face. I scoff.

“What’s with the morning jog?” I ask.

“What’s with all the charts?”

I look down at the charts and laugh. “I’m leading a debate for the animal rights club this evening. I have to stick up all these charts in the literacy room for some group presentations. It’s tough work being the president and all but,” I shrug, “I love it, so I don’t give up.”

There’s a short silence between us as I smile into the distance thinking about it.

“Hey, Malory, about yesterday...”

“-Before you continue...” I say, “just know that he’s a doofus and it doesn’t matter what he says about me.”

“He... seemed pretty upset about the whole friendship thing,” Adrien says carefully.

Why would he be upset?

He’s not my friend and I’m not his problem.

Whatever I do and whoever I hang out with is my business.

And there’s no way Kyle could’ve been jealous. We don’t care about each other half that much.

“He’s always pissed when I’m in a good mood,” I say. “It’s like my joy triggers him.”

Adrien nods in agreement. “Was it okay that I did what I did, though? Wrap my hand around you or call you Mal like everybody else?”

“It’s cool with me. I don’t see the problem with it. You are, after all, my friend.”

I did mind it. I was a bit uncomfortable. But what’s the harm? It’s not a big deal. It just happened once.

He listens, nodding and taking another gulp of water. He stares across the field.

“Today’s my seventeenth birthday,” he says.

I smile at him brightly. “Really? And you decided to come to school?”

He manages a laugh saying, “I think you’d have done the same thing.”

“…True. So... how are you celebrating? Is your dad taking you somewhere? Are you gonna hang out with a couple guys from school... or what?”

“I’m...” he pauses in thought, “not planning to celebrate... at all.”

I frown. “How come?”

He forces a laugh and takes another sip of his water, “Nobody really cares. I’ve spent a lot of my birthdays alone, anyway. It’s no big deal.”

That’s not fair.

Everyone should enjoy their birthday.

“Well, you don’t have to spend it alone today,” I tell him. “Come sit with Olivia and me. Ron’s not coming today so I can’t exactly ask him to join in on the fun. He probably sensed that Davidson was going to be extra prickish today and decided not to come.”

He genuinely laughs this time and then our conversation comes to such a low that we just decide to head back to our tasks.

When I’m done sticking all the charts up in the literacy room, I think about Adrien.

‘Nobody really cares. I’ve spent a lot of my birthdays alone, anyway. It’s no big deal.’

I frown, pulling out my phone to call Olivia.

***

(Adrien)

I walk out of the boys’ shower, towel-drying my hair as the first bell rings. Two voices appear out of the blue singing ‘Happy Birthday to you’ and I look up to find Malory and Olivia with a cupcake holding a single candle.

I smile.

When they finish, we all burst out laughing.

These girls are so cute.

“Well, birthday boy, make a wish!” Malory says.

I wish every birthday could be like this.

I blow out the candle.

Olivia hands me the cupcake and both she and Malory clap, shouting a cheery “YAAAAYYY!”

I bite into the cupcake.

I’m grateful for these two.

“So what did you wish for, Evans?” Malory demands.

Smugly, I say, “Well, it won’t come true if I tell everyone, will it?”

“I suppose you’re right,” she says, defeated.

“I hope you have a great birthday, Adrien. I won’t see you all day like Mal will –only during break and lunch,” Olivia says to me.

She’s adorable with her nervous all-too-obviousness and her pink ombré hair. Interesting choice for a hair colour.

I give her a genuine smile. “Thanks, Olivia.” I turn to Malory. “Thanks, Mal. I wasn’t expecting...”

“That’s the point. Today is your day. Feel special, won’t you?” She encourages me.

“I suppose I do feel special today,” I say, and I’m embarrassed for feeling shy.

***

(Kyle)

I shove my chemistry books into my locker and slam the door, connecting my fist with the metal.

Shit.

What am I even mad about?

Malory and I aren’t friends!

Maybe I was expecting too much.

Maybe I thought things were changing.

Who the fuck does he think he is talking about some bullshit rivalry?

And why did I get so riled up that I couldn’t even talk to Ron after that?

Why am I so angry about it?

I genuinely feel like if someone were to poke me right now I’d explode.

Maybe I should just-

No.

That just wouldn’t be right.

People will suspect things.

Too much could go wrong. The dumb production would be jeopardized by my absense. The principal could call my uncle. Malory knows where I live.

There’s no way out of this.

I punch the locker again, and students around me all stare at the sound of the abrasion before they silently creep away.

I’m not in the mood.

What am I going to do?

I back away from the locker and rush off to the boys’ toilets, but as I bend the corner, I bump into him.

The asshole.

I trip backwards at the impact, and so does Adrien.

“Davidson! What the hell happened to your face!?”

My heart stops.

Adrien’s annoyed eyes go wide with concern.

I fix my hair. Malory didn’t help me out with any cover ups because of our falling out. She didn’t show up and she didn’t try to talk to me. I regret what I said to her. But what can I do about that now?

“It’s none of your business,” I tell him.

He steps back and raises his hands in surrender, “Okay.”

I can’t believe this is happening.

I walk off, and head towards the field –stopping behind the bleachers.

No one ever really goes there. The bleachers were never as popular as people think they are.

I drop to the ground behind it. I know no one will find me.

My heartbeat is so fast I feel faintish as I clutch my chest.

I gasp for air.

I can’t breathe.

What am I going to do now?

What’s Adrien’ going to do?

If that prick rats me out I’m going to be in another huge, unwanted mess!

I run a hand through my hair and grip at it tightly as heavy tears make their way down my cheeks.

I let go of my hair and look down at my hands –they’re trembling uncontrollably with anxiety.

I clench them into fists but my hands don’t stop shaking.

I drag my legs upward to hug them to my chest.

I rest my forehead on my knees.

Breathing is so, so hard. I feel like I’m choking.

What do I do now?

***

(Adrien)

I spot Malory and Olivia waiting for me in the cafeteria, just as they said they would. I leave the lunch line with my tray and head towards them. I can’t get the image of Kyle’s yellow-green bruise out of my head. What happened? I mean it’s none of my business but…

“So, how has your day been so far?” Olivia asks.

I realise I’m not eating. I’ve drifted from reality.

“Huh?” I blink at her.

“Are you having a good day?”

“You seem a little... out of it. Somethin’ bothering you?” Malory asks.

Should I tell them about Kyle?

“I don’t know, to be honest. Today just feels… strange, somehow.”

“Strange? In what way?” Mal asks.

There’s a big-ass bruise on Kyle’s face.

“I’m just not used to people doing things like what you guys did for me this morning. I’m still thinking about it,” I lie, laughing. I bite into a potato wedge and hope that the topic dies. “So, how’s practice for the play coming along?”

Malory groans. “It’s ridiculous. I haven’t even had a proper rehearsal yet because of the stupid old M.I.A. Moron.”

Kyle’s hiding something. I wonder if this is something I should get my dad involved in. Who knows? It could be gang-related. Who leaves a bruise that bad on the face of a guy like Kyle? There are only two ways he seems to exist in the world; invisible around others or intimidating enough to make people run away.

“Don’t worry too much,” Olivia tells Malory. “It’s only been two weeks. The teachers are away that working with you and Kyle would be a handful. I’m sure they expected to have some hiccups in the process. Plus, they’re working with other actors to be productive while you guys sort out your own mess. And even Ron and I are doing a pretty good job, just in case anything goes wrong. Ron is always going on about how he loves the play-”

“I used to love, love, love it! Until one day the universe said ‘Well since you love it so much you might as well share it with the person who pisses you off the most. Balance is everything!’” She interjects, groaning and biting into a fry.

Olivia steals a fry from her plate. “Well, on the bright side, you’re not complaining about having to do it with him anymore. You’re more pissed off about him not being there for practice. That’s progress, I’d say.”

Not that I’ve known Malory for very long, but it really does seem that way. She doesn’t truly hate him. Or maybe she used to and she just doesn’t anymore. Something’s changed.

If cooperation between Kyle and Malory was the plan of the principal all along, then it’s definitely working. It’s a slow and painful process for everyone –especially for Malory and Kyle- but thank goodness for people like Olivia who can point out the positive little things. I’m sure she’s not the only one who noticed they’ve started to change their attitudes towards each other.

“I still wish it wasn’t him,” Malory says. “But I’ve gotten tired of complaining. I know that if we don’t do this, the next threat Bev will bring up out of the blue will probably be expulsion and I do not want to be a hobo.” She grabs a bundle of fries and shoves them all into her mouth in one go.

***

(Ron)

While tapping away at my keyboard trying to finish a literature essay, I look across at Reed, sleeping soundly on my bed. I smile at him. He’s the most adorable little guy there is.

I’m not too keen on missing school, but in this case, I didn’t have much of a choice.

I blink a couple times because my eyes hurt, and I run a hand through my stiff hairspray-drowned hair. Yikes. Really need to wash it.

I smell my hand.

Oh, yea.

Definitely need to wash my hair.

My message tone goes off.

Olivia: Hey

Ron: Hii

Olivia: SOOO I told my parents about the rehearsal thing.

Olivia: They’re okay with the Thursday and Friday thing or whenever else we need to rehearse. Feels like they extended my leash a bit.

Olivia: Imagine that! Ha. They said it’s alright.

Olivia: I won’t be able to come to your place, though.

Go figures. Your parents are...

Olivia: They’re going on and on about how you’re a boy and how I, a young girl and child of God, shouldn’t be hanging out with boys and blah blah blah

Olivia: Whatever. It’s annoying.

Ron: It’s okay, I get it. My mom won’t mind me coming over to your place for practice, so it’ll be fine.

Olivia: Great! So from Thursday then?

Ron: Definitely :)

Olivia: Why didn’t you come to school today?

Ron: Reed is sick so I had to stay home with him for the day. Mom and dad were out at some important meetings, so I had to do the honours.

Olivia: Who’s Reed? Your brother?

Ron: Little brother. He’s 7.

Olivia: awww omg I didn’t know you had a little brother...

Olivia: I hope he feels better :)

I smile.

Ron: He should be fine by tomorrow. The medicine he’s using always works wonders.

Olivia: Well that’s good news

Olivia: Alright, I’ve gotta rush off, but I’ll see you tomorrow!!

Ron: Okay yea, see you!

Conversations with her always seem to end so suddenly. For all I know, she’s probably off to some church activity. Running around and keeping herself busy is her whole life, I realise. Just like Malory. And it’s the same with Kyle.

I find myself wondering about Olivia’s hectic schedule sometimes. I wonder if she does it because she wants to, or if she does it because she has to?

And what about Malory? Is it the same for her?

No question about it Kyle’s got issues he probably has no intentions of telling me about so that’s pretty much a given.

But Olivia…

It has to be a little bit of both, right?

I wonder what it’s like to have to keep yourself busy all the time just to keep from breaking down.

I shake my head. My thoughts have begun to get too dark.

I get back to finishing my work.