"Before" [5]

(Malory)

School begins. School ends. Kyle meets me at the exit doors as I’m stepping out. Ron and Olivia have already parted ways with me and headed off on their journeys home.

There’s a silence as Kyle stands beside me –a silence I can’t decipher with words. It’s not awkward, nor is it tense. It’s kind of a… content moment.

We exit the school compound, and I turn right to head up the hill where I’d find a taxi to get home. Kyle grabs my hand.

Kyle grabs my hand.

Kyle grabs my hand.

And he pulls me one step backwards.

“Let’s walk today.”

“What?” I ask, surprised. I blink a few times at the suggestion. “Kyle I live like fifteen minutes away and I travel frequently but that doesn’t mean I’m fond of walking.”

“That’s no excuse. You used to go to the gym,” he tells me pointedly.

“I still go sometimes –on Thursday. Well, I used to. But the play-”

“-We’re walking today,” he says, stepping down into the other direction.

I turn to watch him. He glances back at me and pauses.

“Come on,” he says, smiling.

“What is up with you?” I ask, suspiciously.

He shrugs. “Just felt like walking is all. And I think we could both use the exercise.”

I raise my brows. “What are you trying to imply? That I’m out of shape? Go to Hell, Davidson. I don’t care what you think.”

“Shut up, Lloyd. I just want to walk today.”

So we walk.

We walk silently for a while. Part of the journey is filled with awkward throat-clearing, swallowing, humming and suspicious glares as we internally try to figure out what to talk about.

When we finally try to talk about certain things, we realise we shouldn’t elaborate too much on them, or those topics just aren’t interesting enough.

We get silent for a while again exhausted from trying too hard.

Eventually, we look at each other and realise we’re being stupid, and we laugh, beginning to enjoy the silent walk.

“If there’s ever a day I can’t make it to practice,” Kyle says, suddenly, “I’ll tell you I can’t come. I forgot to mention that yesterday and I just didn’t feel like texting to be honest.”

“So you decided to walk me all the way to my house to tell me that?”

Liar.

“It’s...” he stops suddenly, and I feel forced to follow him, he turns to me and forces a quick smile before dropping it, “complicated.”

We start walking again.

“Listen...” he says, after a while, “Malory. I know that you know about my uncle, and I just wanted to say... thank you.”

Thank you?

For what?

For not saying anything?

“Not just for not saying anything about it given our patchy friendship but... because you care. You were right yesterday about what you said. My life is pretty pathetic,” I open my mouth to interject but he continues, “But I shouldn’t... be the way that I am around Ron or anyone else. And… thanks for telling me that you actually care. I know that even though we fight a lot, usually we fight about relevant things. Usually. It wasn’t like that before.”

“Before,” I say, feeling the word on my lips, “Before we got along –Before we became friends –Before I found out about some pretty messed up things –Before we had relevant reasons to get along –Before we knew anything. Stubborn, immature ole’ Kyle and Malory.”

He stops and looks to his left. We’ve arrived at my house. “Looks like we’re here,” he says, smirking.