27
- No... I'm not. You're right! We need to solve this problem first and then... if you want we can finish what we started. - Benjamin left me and with agile movements stood up by the table.
- I'm still confused... I feel wrong in doing so. I acted on impulse sorry for kissing you without asking you before...
- You don't need to apologize... we were both involved in our emotions. And besides... - Benjamin said it while he was helping me get off the table- I like girls with attitude.
- But that was wrong! I already have a Master...
- But this week your master gave me you... but I understand you. We've gone too fast and this is dangerous territory... we could lose our heads and do something crazy if we go too far with this. I don't want to disrespect you! I'm the one who should apologize. You had asked me to stop but I kept...
- No problem at all...
- I will recalculate the route and put the ship on its way to Nekrós.
Benjamin seemed ashamed and a little saddened. Indeed we were both ashamed and saddened with the memory of our kiss but I had secretly worshipped all that fire that emanated from our kiss. I could still taste his tongue in my mouth.
I turn my eyes to Benjamin who with great seriousness and concentration shaped our new path to Nekrós. How I wanted to get back to the point where we stopped but there were many things more important than a warm, engaging kiss.
There was Cael,
I stood on my hips while watching the sea and ignoring the almost static and dense tension that had formed between me and Benjamin.
Why didn't I control myself and kiss him at that moment? I could wait a little longer... but I can't fall in love with him! I already have a Master if I fall in love with him I will suffer to forget him... I don't want to suffer again! A kiss is not only the meeting of two lips is the door to a web of complex feelings too much to discard in a day... but I wanted to kiss so much he again... feel the warm taste of his tongue in my mouth. Why is this? Why is my life so confusing? Why am I so confused?
- We're in the right direction now... I'm going to release the crew. Stay here and don't open the door for anyone ...
- Okay... I'll open the lock... do you know where the key is?
- It's... I think it's in the drawer under the central table...
- Okay.
Out of sight of Benjamin's eyes and I began to get busy finding the key that would unlock that table .
- And a large iron wrench with a circle at the end...
- I got it.
- I'll help you find it! There are many drawers on this table...
Benjamin and I began the ritual of opening and closing drawers until finally after removing all the small nautical utensils that might exist inside that room, Benjamin found the much-sought-after key.
- I found the key! Here's Kris...
- Thank you Ben...
I took the key out of his hands and headed towards the door so he could unlock the lock and release Ben so he could free the entire crew.
- I'll be back soon Kris... wait for me here.
- Rest assured... I'm not going anywhere!
- That's my madam!
Benjamin says goodbye with a slight fondness smile by closing the door.
How suddenly I perceive a sigh in love getting out of my lungs and move away from the door.
That couldn't have been happening...that was impossible! Was it too late? Was I already in love with him?
I'm beginning to despair and walking in circles in the cockpit ... what would become of me? If Cael found out about my feelings for Benjamin, he could expose me for infidelity and no one could get me out of the dungeons of the Empire! There would be Benjamin or any another Iudex to rid me of this condemnation!
My chest is started to accelerate. That couldn't be happening... maybe all this was a passion of a station... that would disappear in a week and nothing else! Or even what was encrusted in my heart was a one-night stand... that after having what I wanted that in this case was Benjamin, everything would go back to normal.
I went over those hypotheses in my head to calm my senses. All that was not real... is not possible if fall in love with someone in a single day, in a single night or season. That feeling would pass when my life continued to normal... I just needed to concentrate and survive that trip.
Minutes passed and the movement the ship's deck begins to return to normal.
Benjamin was lingering in his occupations inside the ship.
Several men began to pass through the door of the cockpit watching me as I tried to calm down with the whirlwind of emotions that was inside of me.
I began to feel uncomfortable with all the looks and whispers that the sailors made and that clearly was about me and then I closed the cabin door.
I found it easier to ignore all that male presence of closed door. What my eyes did not see in my heart would not bother to feel.
I was still agitated due to my feelings and so I stopped in front of the rudder and watch the sky, the clouds and the waves... for some reason those elements brought a certain and certain peace in me. Like it was a clear message from the universe that no matter how worried I was or what the consequences of my attitudes and feelings would be... at the end of the day the only thing I could get controlling was where my eyes were focused and what I was looking at.
Light knocks on the door disrupt the flow of my feelings. I looked back and found that it was Ben entering the cockpit with a little tiredness in his eyes.
- Is everything okay? - I asked feeling a heavy energy emanating from him as Benjamin closed the cabin door with the back of his body.
- More or less... Cael is deeply annoyed by the fact that you have guided the ship... even though I say that you made one great job and that we're safe he didn't want listen to me. He said I was irresponsible... to summarize... he almost took away my right to theoretically have you as my pallaki and swore that the council will know this...
- But was it against Any law I drive this ship alone?
- No... but until I resolve all the fuss that this will become... I'll have to work a little harder...
- I'm sorry about that...
- Do not need to excuse! Actually... please stop apologizing for things you didn't do or that aren't your fault! You didn't do anything, this is a problem I'll solve I'll just need a little more time to put these things in order...
Benjamin with heavy steps walked towards the table and stood beside me.
- We gonna be okay, Kris...
- What about the captain?
- He is still under the effect of the sirens' song but in a few hours he will be much better and until then I will take the helm and could you stay here with me... Cael is very angry and can try to use his anger out on you! It'll be safer for everyone if you stay here...
- I'm beginning to worry about what will become of me when this trip is over when I will be alone with him again... - I confessed already feeling nauseous by what would be to come when there was no one else to give limits to Cael.
- You will no longer be alone with him... I will accompany you when the ship docks at Nekrós.
- Pardon?
- Cael has no one waiting for him in Nekrós while I have a whole battalion waiting for me when I go down to the capital. Cael knowing this asked me to lend one of my cars to the two of you so I got it having you for the rest of the trip... I had something he wanted and he had someone who needed my services so...
- You joined the useful to the pleasant and made the perfect proposal to him...
- It was not a perfect proposal but it certainly was an irrefutable!
- Thank you for solving this problem for me but... when you walk away I will need a lot of strength to be able to endure Cael... maybe for the rest of my life I will need this strength...
- I will do my best! I can't annul your pallaki alliance with him... but I can try to make your life a little more peaceful.
Benjamin's eyes found my and our feelings about that situation I was in were mutual.
- I'll take the helm...
- Okay... go ahead, I'll try to help you with something.
- There is the telescope... Do you wanna try it?
.
- Telescope?
- Yep! Are you seeing that staircase next to the door? Between the bathroom door and the exit door cockpit?