Realization II

"How dare you disobey me? Your disobedience shall be punished this moment!" The voice of a man bellowed against the high ceilinged hall that reflected only the shades of a dreary grey, startling the children who were standing in orderly lines. They all felt pity as they looked at the boy who was standing in front of the podium. The man held a finger to his chin, tilting his head before shouting another command.

"Take him to Room 3. It seems that this isn't enough to teach him his lesson. A week should do it. " His gaze met the child's. He smirked as he saw fear slowly creep into those defiant eyes that had been disobeying him a minute ago.

The children gasped as they heard his command. The very command that each one of them dreaded in the past one year the children had been affiliated with that place.

Room 3. Out of the eight punishment room that existed, it was said to be one of the most vicious one after the first two rooms in the numerical order. A room that handed out electric shocks and inflicted psychological damage through visual means. And here this boy was being sentenced for a week into that very Room 3 for his meager disobedience.

"No...please don't...I'll be good!! I promise I'll be good please don't send me there!! I beg you ! please!! Please....please...please..."

He begged as tears began to prick his eyes, reminded about all the stories he had heard of the punishment room he was being sent into.

The child tried to squirm out of the strong hands that held him from escaping the week long punishment. But it was to no avail as they slowly dragged him down, only the sound of the man's laughter echoing in the grey room...

"NOOO...."

Seojin woke with a jolt, clutching his head hard as he tried to stop the incoming pain, sighing as he did so.

What use had been his memory loss when he still remembered every bit of those fragments he had so desperately wished to forget and had instead lost memories he didn't even know of.

He sat in his chair, the pain now subsiding as other thoughts filled his mind.

It must have been well over fifteen altogether at least. Considering the alliance already knew once he was off field, his other members would be the ones doing missions.

Seojin was sure that the alliance must have jumped at the opportunity to use his members to the maximum possible with the group's only D ranker out..

His team wasn't the best just in the idol industry, the cover they used to hide from the eyes of the public, they were also the best when it came to completing the missions that were handled by their agency. Good enough for them to be known amongst the aces or the so called rank list that differentiated all the agents, whether under the agencies, clans or the alliance itself into five levels indiscriminately, with S being the highest and D being the lowest, all based on their individual success rate and performance.

That is, the six of them were already amongst the many in the S list. However, compared to them, the alliance seemed to hold an unknown hostility towards the eldest member of the so called team of aces. One would say it was because of him purposefully flunking his missions and staying at the lowest of the low deliberately, to the point where even his member doubted his abilities, but not many knew the real reason..

These very thoughts were riling up in his mind as he sat on the swivel chair, eyes closed and head leaning on the head rest. His thoughts slowly swirled down into pitch white and then it suddenly became blank like a canvas.

The cheerful façade he had maintained in front of his members had fallen a while ago.

What was he doing? The thoughts that were worrying him vanished.

Why was he being like this? He didn't know, he didn't understand.

Ever since he had woken up in the hospital after his surgery, he knew something wasn't right.

He had realized that the first day he had gotten out of his bed, and walked around the hospital room that had become his home in the past one month.

"Mr. Seojin, we would advise you to try and walk around or move a bit so we can keep an eye on the return of your motor skills. You were in comma for a whole month, it is understandable if you find it difficult. "

The head nurse had smiled at him, as she rechecked his charge sheet once again before leaving him.

Seojin had nodded slightly, with a small smile on his face.

As soon as the woman left the room, his eyes dropped down to his palms that were resting on his lap.

He looked out of the wide glass window that overlooked the hospital grounds below.

The sun was shining bright through the window, lighting up his whole room, it's warmth making itself felt on his face.

Inside, he felt like he should react to this, to the sunlight, to the warmth he was feeling, there was something missing, he could feel it.

He knew he would have reacted the comfortable scenery in some way. But how? How should he react? He didn't know.

Ever since his surgery two days before

All he had felt was emptiness. He didn't know why, or how.

At first he thought it was the hospital, then he thought it must be because his members had been forbidden from visiting him. As he walked around his room, he came to a new realization.

As he looked in to the mirror attached on the room's wall, reflecting his appearance..

His hair had been trimmed extremely short, a buzz cut, the reason being his brain surgery.

Almost all his head was wrapped in the white bandage, there were stitch marks across his right eyebrow, bruising over his back, and right arm in a thick cast, all remnants of his accident.

The realization slowly dawned that it wasn't his surroundings, but him....

It was he who had something off. It was in him that there was something wrong. He was reminded of three days ago, when he had woken up from his month long comma. He remembered how he has woken up in a shock. He remembered what he had felt at that moment, his angst, his sorrow...

But now that he tried to feel those emotions again, he could feel nothing, it was just emptiness.

Why was he sad? Why did he feel all that anguish....he didn't know... he didn't remember....

Did someone hurt him? Had something happened? He didn't remember a single thing.

And once he woke up from his surgery, he no more could feel those emotions...those strong feelings he had felt, he didn't feel any of them, they all felt strange, distant....

How ever now as he sat in his room, remembering those feelings didn't feel that necessary. His mind that had been blank as a white canvas a minute ago, now drew upon the meeting that was about to come up tomorrow with the CEO, a meeting that he believed would probably give him a better clarity on his situation.