Chapter 7: Rain

When I had enough courage and when I think that I look decent enough, and even before I once again feel weak, I went down for dinner. My eyes started to go back to normal--thank goodness as I made my way to the stairs.

“do you not like the food?”

My mother suddenly asked when she noticed my sloth-like movements. I sipped on my water and smirked to hide my difficulty in moving.

“I-it is delicious!” I cleared my throat to remove the uneasiness I am feeling.

I resumed eating and now tried to eat as normal as I can be. I tried doubling my pace from earlier as I noticed her watching me from my peripheral vision. When I tried meeting her eyes, she looked away and pretended that she is busy eating.

I know that she is confused but I am as confused as her! Maybe double of that! I do not understand what is exactly happening to me. May it be just a mere coincidence, but this is too much if that is the reason. Am I sick? Is there something wrong with me? Do I have some-kind of rare disease?

I quickly and weakly finished my food. It took almost all of my energy just to eat properly.

“I am sleepy. Thank you for the dinner, mama.” I was about to walk towards her to kiss her goodnight, but I eventually ceased when I felt my knees beginning to wobble again. I walked as fast as I can without looking back.

I threw myself in my bed when I reached my bedroom. I compressed all my remaining strength to act okay downstairs, in front of my mother. I cannot say that this did not happened in the past for it did when I first ‘traveled’. But unlike that time, my weakness and all is much worst now.

I buried my face on my bed thinking all the possibilities and even jumping into far-fetched conclusions trying to understand what is truly happening to me.

I woke up late the next day. My strength and my body feel like the usual now. It is okay like I was not almost bed-ridden last night. There was an inner battle going on inside me. I was in rush in doing my daily routine, but also spacing out in between, thinking if what I felt yesterday is also a part of my bizarre dreams. Getting to school as fast as I can won, though.

I found myself keeping up the pace after a bit of pacing back and forth. I brushed my teeth and hurriedly descended the stairs after putting on my uniform. I noticed a few buttons wrongly placed so I even tried fixing them after an immediate stop.

When I successfully reached the dining table, and luckily there was a plate of breakfast ready for me, I said grace and ate in big spoonful. My mother who noticed what I am doing stopped eating, mid-air. I drank a big gulp of milk and took a big bite on my toast.

“you look in distressed.” She looked questioningly.

“I am late!” I hardly answered her, in between bites.

Her forehead creased. “no, you are not.”

I stopped a bite mid-air, looking intently at my mother, thinking if I just misheard her. Her furrowed brows, though, made sure that her confusion is in there. “no, you are not late.” She told me once again, and this time I was sure that I did not misheard her. She told me that I am not late, loud and clear.

What is she talking about?

I gulp down the food I chewed, with the help of my milk. I look at the time and slowly pointed the clock hanging on the corner, saying that I have six minutes before the bell rings.

“it is 6 minutes before 8.”

She leaned on her chair and drink her coffee as if doing the same thing that I did; to completely clear the food out of her mouth and down to her stomach. My phone suddenly beeped, indicating that I have 5 minutes left. I stood out of the chair in a hurry and grabbed my bag. I was about to ask for my lunch when I changed my mind and thought of buying in the cafeteria later, instead. Maybe Mama woke up late and forgot about my lunch.

I went for the door but came into a halt when I noticed the streets becoming blurry in my eyes because of the heavy rain outside. Heavy rain? I suddenly remembered an unfinished dream I had. I grabbed an umbrella and turned the knob. I just shouted goodbye to my Mama and rushed to the rain. I heard my mother calling me but maybe it is just my imagination. Maybe she also said her goodbye like the usual.

I opened the umbrella in haste as I run towards the bus stop. the heavy rain continues to fall making my shoes wet from all the spatter. I scrunch up my nose in annoyance. The raindrops are thick, fitful, and increasingly tempestuous in every roof in the small neighborhood. It is raging and wind-driven making the streets unusually misty. Like a storm brewed while I was sleeping and is now going on rampage after a melodious and symphonic drizzles. Frankly speaking, I do not really fancy the rain. It is cold and wet: it is too much for me. I have little tolerance to cold and catches chills whenever my feet and shoulders are exposed. Maybe this is what I got from living in a thin-walled and shabby house.

But I never dislike its totality because it is, after all, the shelter we had for the coldest of coldest times—the roof above us when things do not go our way. Mama told me that we got this house by chance, like pure luck, even if half of her salary goes to fixing some fixtures and a bit of construction of the house in our first few years here.

And given our daily needs and the small amount she earns, that is why she needed to do several jobs which she thinks that I am not aware of, we do not have enough capability to get a nicer and more comfortable house.