38. The beauty of the world

"What the hell happened with you?" Diana looked at her sister that hadn't move from the couch for a day.

Alice said nothing, she stared at the phone and sometimes the wall. She didn't look well, her beautiful face now turned so blue. She felt like has seen the end of the world. It's different than the usual. 

Diana knew it, something not right here. Her sister always annoyed her right before she wanted to go to work and now she hadn't moved or said anything from last night. She exhaled desperately, Diana cares about her sister just it wasn't her style to asked directly her. But, she got no choice.

"Something wrong?"

Diana moved and sat next to her, Alice just rolled her body and covered herself with a blanket. Diana saw her eyes for at a glance. She could see tears in her eye, and her wet cheek. 'God, I don't know how to handle this on this one.'

"If you're not talked to me, how do I know what happened with you?"

Alice whispered, "Just leave me alone…for a moment…please" 

Diana sighed, she couldn't say anything or doing something that could cheer her up. She gave up, and let her stays at her apartment while she went to work. Diana changed her outfit from her bedroom, she kept thinking about what happened to her sister. She could hear Alice was sobbing while she changed her outfit.

'Sad to be a kid these days, a broken heart felt so painful than before. Even when you wanted to seek happiness, but yet you still felt lonely. So hard, everything looks so happy right now, but no one cares what happened underneath their smile.'

Diana walked out from the door, leave it unlocked. Right now she just hoped that her sister would be back like usual. Even though she seems never to care or showed affection to her, she still loved her as a sweet sister.

Diana had to focus right now, back to the routine that she like but these days it felt so boring. After her conversation with James, she often thought about her interest in this world. She loved this job, but she didn't know why it felt so different these days.

#

"Diana, what happened with this news?"

Diana ran to her supervisor with sweat dripped from her body, "I'm sorry sir, but that isn't from my division."

"Diana! You worked here and that's mean that you'll clean all this mess, right now!!"

Diana nodded and back again to her desk, 'Ah shit, what's the fun in this job?' She kept asking a question to herself and tried to be strong with all the pressure that she had time after time. She heard her phone rang, 'James? Why did he call?'

"Diana? Where are you?"

"What happened?" Diana exhaled, confused why he called because as she knew that James wasn't the type of social person. He wouldn't ever call people if there's something wrong or anything important happened. 'What happened with this guy? Did he drink again? Please this is too early to be drunk.'

"Hah, what do you mean by 'what happened?"

"Seriously, I'm in the middle of the work right now," Diana could breathe relief, thank god he's not drunk. She knew that his voice was normal when he called.

James snapped, Diana made him really confused. "You said you'll come by today, and don't act like you didn't remember!"

"Ahh…yeah I said that… wait are you really desperate to see me?"

"What! Hell no!"

Diana giggled, 'What with that reaction? He's so cute.' , "So why are you asking tho? I said that but I didn't say this morning. Maybe this afternoon,"

James sighed, he ran out for words, "…Just come at night if you want to come by, I should go to work this afternoon."

"Huh? What do you mean by that? You're a writer, you work from—" 

Diana stopped her hand from typing, she tried to understand something. Did I miss something? She could felt his anxiety from his tone of voice, unsettle and tried to prevent her from not came this morning. 'Damn, kids!' She thought that he hadn't much different from her sister.

#

Suns got real low, and James laid without any energy left in his body. He sat and put his back on his car chair, he had to know something that hurt him. He never thought about this situation, and he never thought about his condition to face this reality. 

He wasn't thinking when he drove away from the school, the only thing that he wanted to do at the moment was get away from that place. James moved to the west followed the suns, didn't know why. He just got a feeling and he trusted it. His hand still shook and trembled after a minute, and that's why he decided to pull over to calm down.

'All this time? Christy…' He parked his car on the side of the road, watched the suns drown in the beautiful skies. It showed an orange with purple skies painted there, but it all the same to James. 'What's the point to see all of the beautiful things in the world if you couldn't feel it?' 

He still couldn't believe that the most pretty and attractive woman in the world betrayed him. He almost regrets to knew it, but what's done is done. He couldn't deny the fact that happened, but still, he wasn't thought it would be this painful when someone stabbed from behind.

It hurt so bad and drained all of his energy. Although James wasn't cried, his eye was dry just like before. Nothing came out from his eye, that's a bizarre feeling for him. He didn't understand it, but his body still felt shocked.

He stepped away from the car and tried to light up the cigar. His hand was shaking and he couldn't light up the fire properly, 'Ugh fuck! Light up, c'mon light up!' His hand got in trouble for a couple of minutes, his body wasn't ready, and still got a little shock there. 

Everything felt fine when he finally could light it up, his brain, heartbeat, and anxiety felt cool down. He took a breath, a deep breath to made his hand stopped shaking. He looked around, 'Where is this? How far I drive away?' All he could see just a field, so open and large. No one else came over, he didn't see any other people around it just him alone in the empty road.

His phone rang but James hasn't answered it, 'it must be Ed.' He ignored it but it kept ringing, he tried to not care and smoked outside of his car. It went for ten minutes and James decided to answer it. 'Damn this person kept called me!'

"Hello?"

"James? Where are you?" he heard some soft, familiar voices.

"Diana? Why are you calling me?"

Diana snapped, "What? Are you dumb or you aren't capable to remember? I said I'll come to your place this evening."

James was totally forgotten, he was confused and didn't know what to say to her. He was the one that said to came by in the evening. He couldn't take his word away, "Where are you right now?"

"I'm in front of your place you goon!" Diana yelled at him through the phone.

"Okay, just wait,"

James hung up, left Diana questioned and mad at this habit. He always hung up before the conversation end. James just wanted to be alone, at least a little bit longer. He threw back his phone in the car and shut the door. He full of anger in the middle of the empty road stared at the beautiful skies. He saw the beauty of this world but he couldn't feel it, he was too busy with his own anger and sadness until didn't see what life got for him.