School and Home Life

I did as my mother said but I wasn't and still am not happy about it. She doesn't understand that I've been having excruciating pain in my knee and today I have school so... The pain in my knee is like if you'd hit your funny bone, cut yourself and then had someone banging it with a hammer and lemon the whole day.

I get up early like 5:30, I usually feel quite sick in the morning and I don't know what it's based on. I know it sounds weird but it's true. If I brush in the morning I'm bound to vomit. I brush at night and make sure I don't eat anything that will cause me to feel gassy and then that causes me to vomit. Too much information?Sorry!

Anyways I then get changed very fast after setting my bag for the day ahead. Today is Sunday after the weekend, we have our weekend on Friday and Saturday. Today I have PE, I dread this subject now. My left knee has been paining, I do a lot of walking at school and then I also have to do PE. PE is tough! Anyways it's a last period worry.

I get into the car with my brother Chase and my mum waiting to drop me off for the dreadful day ahead. I love school but I'm not in the mood to do anything anymore. Nothing is appealing! I just sit in the car looking out the window wondering about the day ahead. We are a very spiritual family so before I leave for my day of school we say a prayer.

I gladly run inside to escape my problems. My emotions are up and down. It's quite early when I get there so me and my friend walk until the bell rings, declaring that it's time to line up.

Me and my friend make our way to the line. She stands in the front and I stand just behind. I have already complained to her about my pain and she listened. The line takes longer if there's an assembly. Today they decided to have an assembly. I just told my friend Mallory that I'm going to lean on her since my hips start to pain when I stand this long. Some-days I can support myself with both my legs other days I have to lean more on my right which causes hip pain.

I never realized that I used to have all these pains when I was a kid, until now. Eventually, the assembly concluded and every grade went in their order towards class. We then start to walk when it is our turn. We make our way to class at the end of the school which can feel like forever if you can't walk, today I could sorta walk.

The day went by and nothing went wrong! I feel pain when I walk because it's too much walking from one class to the next, or even sitting too long can be irritating too! It's like if a normal person were to run, the same amount of energy required for that is the same amount of energy required for me to walk for a little while. I have problems with sitting so long, I do it but it's very irritating to my soul that I have to sit all the time!

Finally, the last class of the day. My teacher refuses to take excuses that I can't play PE so I've decided to try again. It's not like I'm gonna die! My teacher thinks it's trivial. People keep saying that but I keep it strong in my mind that I'm no liar.

I make my way and we have to play basketball today. Which means there's a lot of jerking to stop fast and then to jerk to run fast quickly. You get the idea. I had to play only because its graded otherwise I would've found a way out of it. I do it anyway and I can feel my knee is fine with the exercise right now, but I've done this before so I know that the repercussions of my stupid actions just so I don't get into trouble are gonna be the reason I can't walk tomorrow.

I feel it being weird but I just play because she's watching us. It's so uncomfortable that I can literally feel my knee socket and I wish it would just crack. I play, trying to get the ball but failing as their opposing team is guarding me with great effort, but I just have fun! I walk to the car, before the bell sounds, and honestly I can feel my knee swishing and its as if my bones are rubbing against each other trying to dominate each other when they've lived in peace for years. It feels strange but I decide to just carry on as if nothings wrong, a smile plastered on my face. The sun blazing in my eyes and my head throbbing from its gaze.

I make my way there to see my mum and my brother Chase waiting for me, my brother Hayden isn't here anymore. Hayden is back home working as a volunteer.

"Hey Raven, I'm so glad your home. Fawn is complaining about the fact that we're all going to leave her behind and carry on with life,"he says concluding his mantra. "Yeah Raven! She refused to come because she was so mad!" My mum says looking at me weirdly. I just tell them about my day, as usual, I complain about my knee. I then decide to cover myself and go to sleep because the sun is my enemy.

My mum and brother walk into the welcoming house. The house is eerily quiet when I step foot into it. I continue my nervous trek into the unknown and a ball of fuzzy black hair makes its way running towards me with its green eyes trained on the bottom-half of my body. I groan when she makes contact with me as she hit my knee so far back that I can't even recall what happened. I feel the pain travel from my knee through to my head and explode into sparks, I feel like swearing. It's like seeing fireworks going off but in your head and then you can never imagine life without it. The pain traveled like electricity and went up in flames in my brain creating a lose of memory.

"Fricken' hell Fawn!"I shout so loud that it draws everyone's attention. Everyone looks at me like I committed the ultimate sin. I see green eyes tearing up, like it's raining in the forest. Fawn bursts into loud tears and runs to her bedroom! I roll my eyes annoyed at her dramatics. My mum gives me a death glare. I just limp slowly to a chair and collapse in it almost breaking it to pieces.

My mum has some worry evident in her green eyes but she's so angry that it masks the beauty of the worry and replaces it with clear as day madness. "Raven Genevieve Porter, go apologize to your sister this instant,"she says stating the obvious. "I'm going to but in a minute. I'm dreading the idea of walking up those stairs. If you want me to apologize this instant then you have to call her down here cause she hurt me too. Physically,"I say concluding the longest straightforward speech I've ever given my mother.

My mum just gives me this look like, did you just talk back to me. She says, "How dare you speak to me like that?" "Well if you listened we wouldn't be here right now, would we?"I say with my anger also coming to its boiling point. I then see Fawn and she's watching me with tears in her eyes and I feel bad but this is the only way. An argument, which I never have, with my mum is the only way to make her see that I'm not ok since she won't listen.

"Listen to what exactly, that you're lazy and that you don't want to be with your sister anymore. I don't get you! You used to do things and now you don't! You started having fun and now you don't! You play with your sister and don't mind the hugs she gives you when you come home and now you do!" She concludes exasperated.

I stare at her for a few minutes and then I start my rant, "Maybe if you actually listen to what I have to say then we wouldn't be here right now! I'm in a lot of pain and she just made me forgot a few seconds of my life because of the severity of the pain! I can't deal with this anymore so I'm just gonna go!" She grabs me roughly by the elbow and my shoulder clicks so loud. I pull it away from her and quickly move it around so it's comfortable again.

I look at her and glare. I limp all the way to the stairs and up it, I barge into my own room and don't bother apologizing to a very selfish and self-centered Fawn. She needs to learn that not everything revolves around her. She isn't the sun and everyone doesn't just need her around all the time. I am feeling ashamed by how I acted but honestly I'm too tired but sleep doesn't come until the early morning. I wake up a few hours after falling asleep and realize I've done none of my hw. It barely fazes me that its undone and that I'm unprepared for life itself.

I sit up and then try to get on with my daily routine. My rush to get out of bed brought to light my new problem for the day including many others to come!