8

He was looking at me and I didn't like that the look made me feel uncomfortable and naked. He released the tight grip he hand in my hair and it felt sore.

I avoid his gaze and picked up the broken pieces of glasses and throw them in the bin. I went to the storage room to get the dustpan.

He was still standing where I left him and he was watching me closely. I tried to avoid his eyes but I could feel his eyes burning my body and it wasn't a good feeling. It's never good when we were in the same room.

It's not safe being in the same room with him because I don't know when he will pounce on me. I can never feel safe in the same room with him. When I was finish cleaning up the pieces of broken glasses and the water from the floor I put back everything to where they were.

I made my way to my room. When I was at the middle of the stairs I felt his presence behind me making me walk faster. I was at the top of the stairs ready to run to the safety of my room when he stopped me.

"Grace?" He called my name and I slowly turned around to face him. He was looking up while I was looking down on him.

"Yes Dad." I answered warily.

"You're still my little girl right?" He asked. I was taken aback by this and I'm sure there was shock on my face.

"Yes Dad." I answered because it was the only response I could formulate.

"You know I love you right?" He asked another question that I was sure if I wasn't holding onto the stair railing i would have fallen over. What he loves me? But what father (step) father loves their daughter (step) and beats them and when he feels like touch inappropriately.

A lot of things was running through my head at the moment but I had to go with the answer he wants. I always have to always give him what he wants.

"Yes Dad." This is the only way I could answer these questions.

"And I'm sorry for hitting you like I did downstairs. I was just having a bad day and I'm sorry I took it out on you. I'll never do it again. Do you trust me?" He apologized and I wasn't shock because that would be an understatement if I did. I was confused with his sudden behaviour and my brain was running wild.

His questions were knocking my off my feet and I suddenly forgot that I needed to get away from him and lock myself in my room.

"I know Dad." I said avoiding his last question.

"Goodnight Grace." This was another unusual thing he does.

"Goodnight Dad." I replied and run to my room and closing the door.

I crawled into my bed and under the cover with a million thoughts running through my head. It would not stop so I could go back to my bed. The last thing I remembered before it got tired and I fell into darkness is: Am I looking for a non abusive life here with him and does this mean he as change and this will be different for me and us?

I woke up with someone touching me in my sleep. I didn't know who was in my room and why they were touching me but I didn't like it and my heart started racing.

I was about to scream when a hand covered my mouth. I was panicking and I didn't know what to do. From the rough hands I know it is a male that is in my room touching me.

How did he get in? My window is closed and the door is locked so how did he get in. I was full blown panicking. Does dad knows that someone is in the house and in my room.

I thought I had locked my room door but I didn't I guess I was too distracted to lock it because of the weird conversation I was having with my step dad. I was trying to beg the stranger in my room but it all came out muffled because his hand was still over my mouth.

"Shhh." He was hushing me. I stopped trying to talk but I was still afraid and panicking. I was thinking about as soon as he took his hands off of my mouth I am going to scream bloody murder. "If you promise not to scream or make a sound i will remove my hand." He said.

It wasn't any he or a stranger that was in my room it was my step father. I should have sighed in relief and be happy it wasn't anyone else in my room instead I panicked more and my fear increase and I was tense. I nodded my head and release my mouth.

"Dad?" I called him questioningly like asking what he was doing in my room and touching me. "What are you doing?" I said getting faraway from him as possible without falling off the bed.

It was dark so I could only see the silhouette of him. The moon didn't do much to light up the room because the certain was drawn.

He got up off of the bed and made his way to the door. I thought he was leaving but he turned the lock and I heard it when he lock us inside. I was scared and I was trembling in fear. Why would he locked the door with him side.

He switched on the lights. "You didn't think I forgot about your punishment do you?" He asked in a sick way and I wanted so bad to disappear into the bed. "Now get up out of the bed and stand." He command in that tone that left no room for arguments.

I have never jumped up out of the bed so fast in my life of getting up out of bed. I think it was the fear of having him hit me if I didn't do what he commands me to do.

"Now take off your clothes. All of it." He said his voice husky and dark.

I shake my head no with tears forming in my eyes. I don't want to do this. I don't want to take of my clothes so he can see me naked. A father is not suppose to see their daughter naked like this or command them to get naked in front of them.

"Are you disobeying me? Do you want me to get the belt?" He asked with a raise eyebrow.

"No no please." I started begging tears running down my face.

"Then take of the damn clothes before I go for it." He said angry that I haven't started stripping in front of him.

"No please dad don't let me do it. I don't want to do it." I plea with him but his eyes just turned dark and i know he was going to beat me until I blocked out but I will choose that over stripping in front of him.

He motioned for me to come closer and I did so reluctantly. I was shaking now with tears running down my face.

"Shhh don't cry. I'm sorry I got angry at you." He said drying my tears and rubbing my cheeks. I don't know where this gentle side of him I coming from but i prefer it over all of his other sides. "Are you still daddy's little princess?" I could only nod.

"Good. I know you are now be a good little girl and do what daddy says and I promise I will not hurt you." He said calmly.

"No dad please don't make me do it." I begged again but it was in vain.

He gripped my jaw in a way it hurts and bring my face up to look him in the eyes and they were deadly.

"That's not the answer that i want princess and you're testing my patience and you don't want Daddy to get mad at you. Do you want to be unconscious for days again? Do you want me to suffer you give you no food? Do you want me to lock you down in the basement again and beat your every night until you learn not to disobey me and be my good little princess?" He was squeezing my jaw painfully and the only thing I could do was cry and give him a weak reply.

"No." It was the only word that left my mouth. With it he pushed me away from him. I lost my balance and landed on the floor.

"Now take off those clothes before I fucking hurt you badly." He barked at me and i flinched.

I stand up and take off my clothes slowly while crying. It makes no sense I beg him not to do that because he never listened and i know if I don't do this he is going to do just what he said he would and he will punish me like he never had before.

You must be wondering why no one knows about this is because he is a good liar and to everyone he is an angel.

No one knows that he is an alcoholic or that he beats me. To them he is a good husband and a good father to his step dad. If I had run to anyone and tell them about my situation they would call me a liar. Then they would report back to him and i would have gone through something worse.

I was standing in front of him now in my bra and underwear. I tried to cover up as much from his eyes.

"That's my good little girl, now remove your hands." He command his eyes diluted with lust.

I shake my head. He step forward and backhand me and I staggered. "If you disobey me again I swear I would do worse than hit you."

I cried at his promise and removed my hand. He licked his lips like the pervert and monster he is. He stood there staring at my body drinking in everything. "Turn." I did as I was told and turn my back towards him. "Turn." He licked his lips again biting it. I didn't like the way he looked at my body and the way he licked his lips like he wanted to taste me.

My body shivered in disgust and fear. It was always fear. I just stood there in front of him uncomfortable and embarrassed. I was fighting hard not to cover up because I know what was coming and my face was already hurting.

"As any man seen you like this? Has anyone touched you before?" He asked and i know what he was talking about.

"No." I crooked because my voice was rusty from all the crying. "I'm a virgin." I stammered.

"Good. Now lie down and don't move." He said.

I did what he said hesitantly. I could hear clothes shuffling and i look to him with wide eyes. Please don't let this happen to me. I can take all the beating but not this.

"Please don't do this me. Please I am begging you don't do this. Please." I started begging going on my knees. He stopped taking off his clothes and looked down on my form on my knees begging him not to do what he want to do to me.

He didn't listen to all my begging instead he slapped me across my face. I slumped down to the floor crying.

"What did I say about disobeying me? Now go on that bed and lie down this is your punishment." He said.

All the blood drain away from my face and I know I was pale. "Please Daddy don't do this." I begged again and i begged.

"Okay." He said getting closer to my form on the floor. "Sincw as you don't listen I'll do this myself." He took me up and threw me on the bed roughly.

I was on my knees again begging him not to do it. I know it will break me if he do it. He ignored my pleas and took off the remaining of his clothes and walked towards the bed I was kneeling down on.

"Please." I tried again to get to him.

"Shut the fuck up." He shout in my face and slapped me and i fall on the bed with the impact. I tried crawling away from him but he grabbed ahold of my foot and i started kicking.

I kicked him in the face and he cursed. I used that had my chance to get to the door but that didn't happened as I fall face first on the carpet floor.

He got onto of me and gave me a few beatings before throwing me back on the bed. I didn't stop fighting. I tried pushing him off of me and tried stopping him from from taking of the remaining clothes I had on which was my only barriers from his preying eyes.