Letting Go

Itsuki grunted when he heard someone knocking from outside. It is only seven in the morning and he still wants to stay in the bed with Megumi. He buried his face on her back while hugging her waist.

"Who is that?" Megumi woke up because of it and she sat up to look around. The knock got louder, so he had no choice but to get up from the bed and wore his clothes before opening the door.

Megumi hid under the blankets since she is still naked and she heard his conversation with his sister. It looks like they will go somewhere and Itsuki will be the one to be left alone in the house to guard it.

"Your girlfriend is there. Take care of her, ne?" His sister said and she blushed because of that. He closed the door and she got up from the bed with the blankets to cover her body.

"Am I your girlfriend?" She asked and instead of receiving an answer from him, she received a deep kiss. She gripped on the blanket lightly and kissed him back and after a few seconds, he slowly broke it and placed a kiss on her forehead.

"What do you think?" He asked before gently pulling her into a hug. She slowly shook her head and rested her head on his chest.

"I don't know. You know that I'm still like this." She mumbled and felt a kiss on her crown. She smiled softly, realizing that it is her first time to see this side of him.

"I don't want to say this but I think I need to." She looked at him and stared at his eyes. She can feel the coldness but the seriousness covers it all.

"Hmm? Tell me." She said softly with a little smile on her lips. She must be prepared for what he will say.

"I don't want to love someone who is not yet done loving a dead person." He is right. Who wants to love someone who is not yet done loving another man, especially if this man is already dead?

She slowly looks down and she can feel her tears are about to fall. She should not cry in front of him. She took the blankets off from her body and went to the laundry room to wear her clothes that she washed last night.

After that, she ran out of the house to go to the graveyard. She fell on her knees when she arrived there. The bouquet of white roses she bought last week is now withered. She started crying hard and she wanted to scream.

"Yuki, why do you need to leave me? Why?! I need you here!" She gripped on the hoodie she got from him tightly and hugged herself after, thinking that Yuki is hugging her instead.

"Will you let me love another person now? I don't want to cry anymore." She kept on crying hard in front of Yuki's grave, pouring all the sadness and pain left from her heart.

Meanwhile, Itsuki started to clean his room. He doesn't really want to hurt her but at the same time, he wants her to walk to him. With that, he will feel that she wants him, that she needs him instead of Yuki. Does he need to die first for her to realize that there is still someone who is willing to love her despite her past?

He admits to himself that he is harsh on what he has said to her but if he will not say that to her, will she even wake up from her dreams? She is in reality that Yuki will never come back to her anymore. She can't bring back the dead anymore.

After cleaning his room, he went out to follow her to the graveyard. Where else will she go? He suddenly stopped at the doorway. He should not be the one to walk to her. If Megumi wants him, she will come to him.

He remembered those times that he was staying at the graveyard for some time, watching her sleep there. When she is about to wake up, he will already leave so that she will not see him there. He watched her weep for Yuki. He saw how much tears she cried for him. He saw how lonely and lifeless she was when he first met her.

He wants to bring happiness and love to her but if she will not let him do that, how can she move on from him? He lets her annoy him everyday so that he can see her laughing and smiling.

When they became bandmates, he started to take care of her. Whenever their leader wants to treat them to food, he will secretly give some money to their leader, telling him to use that money to buy the food for Megumi. Because of that, their leader learned that Itsuki loves her. Megumi only knows that it is their leader who treats them food but behind that, it is Itsuki who spends money for her food. Just to see her happy while eating.

One time that she got sick, since they are also classmates, he wrote the notes for her and asked her seatmate to give it to her. He even told her that she should not know that it is him who wrote it. Will there be a time that he will not do those in secret anymore? He wants everyone to know how much he loves her, that the Ice Prince they are calling is no longer an Ice Prince because the coldness of his heart is now melted by a girl named Megumi.

He is also the one who secretly leaves chocolates and flowers in her locker, making it look like that he is a secret admirer. Whenever she is receiving those, she will run to him and will tell him that her secret admirer gave her those. He saw how she eats each piece of chocolate with a smile on her lips, how she loves the smell of each bouquet she got from him.

Will she even realize that the person she needs is just beside her and waiting for her to look at him? He smiled faintly while thinking about those. Sometimes, he is thinking if she is that dense to know that it is him who keeps on making her smile and happy. Within a short span of time, he did those for her. What if he has all the time already? Seeing her happy is already a happiness for him. It has been almost a year since the first day he met her. They will be second year students soon.

"Itsuki!" He looked at the person who called him and saw Megumi standing a few steps away from him. He completely opened the door to see her.

"Will you still accept me?" He stared at her and saw that her eyes were swollen and puffy. She cried again, that's all he can think.

He was about to walk to her but she stopped him. Instead, she ran to him and hugged him tightly. He took a deep breath before hugging her back. He waited for this day to come.

-

"Icchan, will you still accept me?" Megumi started to sob softly, burying her face on his chest. She never felt this before; the feeling that she might lose someone if she will not be able to move on from her past.

"I don't want to be someone's replacement in your heart, Megumi. I hope you understand what I mean." Itsuki mumbled but he cupped her cheeks and wiped her tears. He doesn't like seeing her crying. He doesn't want her to cry anymore.

"I understand. We can work this out, right?" She kept on sobbing and then, he nodded his head and rested his forehead on hers. She closed her eyes while trying to calm herself.

"Don't cry anymore. I don't like it when you cry." She started to cry more when he said that. It is early in the morning and the neighborhood might think that he is making her cry, so he carried her back inside the house and closed the door.

"Stop crying. You're so loud." He glared at her and she pouted, hiding her face on his shoulder. He placed her down on the couch and took her shoes off.

She bit her lower lip and took the hoodie off, thinking of throwing it away when she got back home. Since she is already starting a new relationship with Itsuki, she doesn't want him to think that she is still keeping every single thing that Yoshiyuki gave to her.

She will put everything in a box and hide it somewhere else. If she will still wear the hoodie, it will just give her a hard time focusing on Itsuki. She was thinking where she put her choker with the little key and she remembered that she didn't wear it yesterday.

Itsuki got one of his shirts and gave it to her. He knelt in front of her and cleaned her knees with a damp towel. She watched him while smiling and after that, she stood up to go to the kitchen and make breakfast for them.

"What do you want to eat?" She asked while looking at the contents of the fridge. She felt his arms around her waist and when she looked at him, he started kissing her neck.

"What do you want to eat? I will cook." She repeated but it seems he didn't hear anything. Her eyes widened when she felt like someone stung her neck. She immediately turned around and looked at him, seeing a smirk on his lips.

"What did you do, Hironaka Itsuki?" She asked and then, she ran to his room to look at her neck. She touched the hickey that Itsuki put on it, remembering that it will take some days before it disappears.

"Icchan, this will take some time before it disappears." She whined while still looking at it. Itsuki followed her inside his room and she didn't even hear that he locked the door.

This man is a living trap of sins and she will not be able to escape from him every time he is in the mood to do it with her. She is busy worrying about the hickey on her neck when Itsuki suddenly pushes her down on the bed. She screamed but he covered her mouth with his hand. She glared at him and shoved his hand away. She almost got a heart attack but she can feel that irresistible aura he is emitting.

"So, you're like this when you want it?" She mumbled as she gazed on his lips. She leaned closer and licked it before biting it softly, pulling it. She wrapped her arms around his nape and started to leave wet kisses on his jawline.

She noticed that he froze on his spot but she didn't stop and just continued until she pulled him closer, sitting on top of him instead. His hand slid under her skirt and pulled down the lingerie she is wearing. She helped him from taking it off and after a few moments, she knelt down in front of him.

Itsuki is just watching her while she is taking his boxer shorts off. He took a deep breath when he felt her lips and tongue against his length. Sometimes, he can't believe that she can easily make him this hard. With just one touch from her and he is already craving for her like he is a wild beast.

"Megumi.." He groaned lowly while caressing her hair. She pushed her head more between his legs and started giving him the pleasure that he wants. It is her first time to do it but at the same time, she doesn't want to disappoint him.

She can feel his hard length throbbing inside her mouth while moving her head slow. His groans are getting louder every time she is making her pace faster. She shut her eyes when the tip was already hitting her throat and she almost choked with it, feeling her eyes teary.

She tried to look at him and she saw how pleased he was. She bobbed her head faster and after some minutes, he released his orgasm inside her mouth. He was panting heavily when Megumi suddenly stood up and went out to go to the bathroom.

He lied down on the bed and covered his face with his arm while still catching his breath. When she came back, she saw him already shirtless but he is already wearing his boxer shorts again.

"It's my first time.." She mumbled when she hugged him gently. He placed a kiss on her forehead and smiled at her.

"You did great." She can't help but to laugh at his remark, nodding her head while feeling his tight hug around her.