The Beginning

There are certain moments in life where once you experience the consequences, you wish more than anything to go back in time to redo it. Personally, I never really had any of these moments, and while I did want to live as best a life as I could, I understood the importance of failure and messing up. However, I should've realized that death was included within these events. My death, put simply, was poorly mistimed.

It was a cool autumn evening when I was walking home with my girlfriend, Sam. She and I had been through it all, and I was ready to endure anything that life had prepared for us in the future. Funny enough, I would never get that opportunity at all. It would all end on this fateful day at 7:38 PM.

As we were walking home from the store, I closed my eyes and took in this personal moment of pure happiness, an experience that I hadn't really had all that much throughout my past. Sam understood this, and when she saw me embrace this moment she smiled and wrapped me in a big hug.

"You gonna be okay, Derrick? Or do I have to do everything for you?" Sam teased in a playful tone. She looked up at me and studied my face carefully. "You don't seem normal at all... Did you embarrass yourself earlier?"

"What? What are you even talking about?" I shot back as Sam giggled with a smile. As we continued walking my head couldn't wrap around that one comment she made. Yes. Something wasn't okay at all. I planned to propose to her after 5 years of dating and honestly, it was the most scared I've ever felt. I didn't think she would say no, but the mere chance that she could paralyzed me to the bone. As I fidgeted with the ring box in my pocket I tried to come up with a special way of proposing. I wasn't creative at all, but for times like these, I had to give it everything I got. We stopped at a large crosswalk across a main intersection and patiently waited for the crosswalk signal to turn green. Sam, as usual, wanted to investigate my suspicious behavior, and this was the perfect time to do so.

"Like I said, you're usually not like this," she calmly stated, examining my moves carefully. "You know, if it's something I did then just tell me. I love constructive criticism." I shifted uncomfortably and continued to fidget with the ring box.

"It's probably in your head," I simply replied. "Maybe it's something worse. You eat anything bad today?" I thought I did a good job hiding my secret until I saw a gleam in her eyes. She had many different types of gleams, but this one didn't look too good.

"Uh huh, yeah, sure," she said, moving her eyes down my coat. "Say, what's in your pocket? Seems like you're having a good time with it." My slumped back shot up in shock as I tried to make myself look as normal as possible.

"My phone, wallet, ketchup packets, bread sticks, you know, the usual." Before I could look back at her she quickly launched herself at me and tried to dig her hand inside my pocket. Luckily for me, I had planned this in advance, and I cupped the box in one hand and moved it away from her body.

"Hey! What's the deal? It can't be THAT bad!" she said, trying her hardest to get the box out of my hand.

"Don't worry about it!" I replied, my hand still outstretched away from her. "Seriously, it's nothing important!" While our small skirmish ensued the crosswalk signal turned green, and a large influx of people began crossing the street. Living in a large city like this had major perks, but it also had pretty bad downsides. Bad pedestrian traffic and rude commuters were some of them. With our attention fixated on the ring box, we didn't notice the light turn green, so when people began walking to our side in a rush, we weren't prepared for the possible contact involved with large amounts of people. A man in a business suit, seemingly in a hurry, rammed my side and pushed me back.

"Oof!" As my body staggered back I could feel my grip on the box loosen. This was gonna get bad. The box flung out of my hand and onto the crosswalk, and as I got back up to stabilize myself, I scanned the floor for any sign of the ring.

"Derrick! Are you hurt?" Sam asked me in distress, running to my side like she always had. "Geez, what was up with that guy?" She noticed that I hadn't said anything and watched my eyes scan the ground. "What's wrong? Are you looking for something?"

"No no, it's just tha-" I was interrupted by my brain suddenly spotting the box on the ground. It had opened and the ring wasn't too far from it. Before I could move again to retrieve it, Sam's hand stopped me by my shoulder.

"Derrick, is that what I think it is?" she asked, her eyes beginning to light up with joy. I blushed and moved to retrieve the ring. Once I had it firmly in my hand, I got down on one knee and did the unthinkable.

"Sam, will you marry-" My eyes quickly shifted to the right as a large truck began moving towards the crosswalk without any sign of stopping. Thanks to the man from earlier the ring had landed in the direct middle of the crosswalk, a location not suitable for maximum safety. The truck swiftly closed in, but I noticed that it wasn't capable of hitting both of us. In fact, it's size and straight path meant it would only hit one of us.

In this instant, it was Sam. Before I could think I felt my body suddenly move up and launch itself at Sam, pushing her away in the process. I could see the fear and terror on her face as she watched the truck move towards, and eventually slam into the upper half of my body. I'll never forget her face when I initially proposed to her. It was one of pure glee and ecstasy but at the moment, all that rendered in my mind was pain.

I felt a huge surge of pain as my body was flung away from the crosswalk and into the crowded street. It was a feeling unlike any other, but after a small moment it was washed over by a feeling of numbness. I could feel my head swirl and turn extremely light, as if my consciousness was slowly bleeding out of me. If so, it wasn't the only thing bleeding out of me at the moment. As my head began to fade away I slowly lifted my hand up to the sky. I wanted Sam to save me. I wanted to be with her. I wasn't ready to go yet. But in the heat of the moment, relief from this pain was the only thing my body wanted. And that meant death. Darkness began to intrude my vision, and the only thing I could sense was my fear of leaving this world.

Please. Please no. I'm not ready for this. I have so much more to do. I want to be so much more. Sam, please. Save me. I'm sorry. Sam. Sam.

Sam.