Regrets

Kakashi's POV

I watched as Akari paced around the kitchen making lunch. We haven't had a long conversation ever since I got out of the hospital a day ago. I looked down at my book pretending to read for a while until I heard something fall to the ground and a thread of curses following it. "What happened." I said walking into the kitchen. I saw Akari crouched down on the floor picking up some chopped vegetables. "Nothing bad." She said getting up with a plastic bowl. I internally sighed as she turned around to wash the vegetables.

We've been so detached lately I know something is bothering her. We sat down for dinner and unlike other nights it was quiet. "So I heard you gave Sasuke a list of D rank missions as a punishment, what did he do." I asked trying to break the awkward silence which has never bothered me before. "He left the village, to go after Obito, apparently someone tipped him that Obito was in the village, before he went after Naruto." Akari replied uninterested. I finished dinner and washed the dished while Akari cleared things up. "Hey kari, we need to talk." I said grabbing her hand as she headed to the bedroom.

"Look, I know something's bothering you, and we need to talk about it." I said firmly and Akari tried to get out of my grip. "I'm tired Kakashi." She said and I pulled her into a hug. She tensed up and I only hugged her in harder. I finally let her go and she walked to the room without a word. I sighed walking into the room behind her.

Akari's POV

Danzo's words really got to me more than I want to ever admit it. I changed my clothes and laid down on the bed turning away as Kakashi came to lay down. I didn't want to push him away, but I didn't want comfort from him, not yet.

I felt the bed dip and I realised that Kakashi settled next to me. He laid his hand on top of me before reaching up and kissing my cheek. I heard him sigh before snuggling next to me. I felt the texture of the bandages around his chest which gathered tears into my eyes. I fell asleep a little while later exhausted from fighting with my emotions.

Nightmare

I look around the dark room, I saw Sasema and Hayato laughing and joking around next a tree. A smile came on my face and I started walking to them but before I reached them a thick layer of blood coated me and I saw their dead bodies as blood pooled around them. I saw Ai sensei next and my eyes widened. "Sensei." I said and she looked at me hate pooling her eyes.

"You are a chunin and you were suppose to be stronger than the both of them, but you can barely defend your comrades nevertheless you couldn't even complete the mission, you were never my student and don't you dare call me sensei." She yelled at me and fresh tears gathered my eyes. I fell to my knees covering my ears as her words echoed the surrounding. I opened my eyes looking up to my surrounding and I saw Kakashi, with Minato sensei and Kushina sensei. I tried to run to them but my body was covered in some sort of black goo that kept my glued to the ground.

Minato sensei and Kushina sensei disappeared, and Kakashi turned to me laughing like a maniac. He whipped out a kunai and lunged at me making me move back. "Dying would be a luxury for a traitor like you." Kakashi said and it was not his voice I heard. "You don't deserve luxury." He finished and before I knew it he stabbed the Kunai into his own chest. "KAKASHI." I screamed out as he coughed up blood before falling on the ground.

Nightmare end

My eyes opened up but I tried to breathe but I couldn't. It was like someone was clutching my throat, stopping me from taking full breaths. But there was no one, I was all alone. Tears started trickling down my eyes and I felt someone release their hands from mine.

Kakashi's POV

I was woken up from my sleep by Akari, she was moving around a lot. Akari was not a sound sleeper but I've never seen her move around this much. "Kari." I said shaking her a little, but in return to that she threw a punch at me which I caught. She started fighting me back and I pinned her arms down before using my body to pin the rest of her body. "Kaka- shi." Akari stuttered in her sleep and I saw a tear slip out of her right eyes. "Akari." I shouted shaking her body the best I can pinning her down. She snapped her eyes open and tried to jump up but failed with me on top of her.

Her eyes darted around the room, and her breathing started to become short and she stopped struggling, I noticed tears starting to form around her eyes. She's having a panic attack. I thought and I quickly loosened my grip on her hands.

I pulled her into my arms and she tensed up starting to struggle again. "Kari, I know you can hear me." I said is a slow soothing voice. "Can you breath with me." I asked her and I got no reply. I kicked myself remembering that she can't respond right now. "I need you to breath with me okay." I said and I took a deep breath and Akari slowly took a breath. I repeated the process until she was taking breaths on her own. My shirt was getting wet with her tears and I pulled her in closer. "It's going to be okay." I whispered rubbing circles on her back. "Kari." I said after awhile and she pulled away from me. I moved my hand up to her face wiping away the wetness there was still on her face.

"Hey, look at me." I spoke in a hushed voice and she met my eyes. "I'm sorry." Akari burst into tears and I pulled her close to me. "I'm never going to be strong enough." She said into my chest which came out muffled but I understood. "Kari, you're not weak, your the most strongest person I know." I said and she looked at me with puffy eyes. "You always say that Kakashi, but you even know that is not true." She responded surprising me. "I couldn't save any of them Kakashi, because I wasn't strong enough to protect them." She said and I realised who she was talking about.

"Kari, This? These tears are showing how strong you are, they are not a weakness. They show how strong you are, and how strong you've been. And if you don't believe me, look back and know that you were strong enough to overcome all the regrets that always surrounded you." I said and she opened her mouth to respond. But I silenced her by pulling her into a kiss, we pulled away and she met my eye after a long time. "Kashi." She mumbled and I wiped away the tears that were still falling.

"Can you promise me something." I asked her and she nodded. "Promise me, that you won't keep such a heavy burden on yourself anymore, I'll always be here for you kari." I said touching my forehead with her. "I promise, but you'll have to do the same." She said her voice scratchy from crying. "I promise." I said before pulling her into another kiss.