Last Day's Lost Joy

Saturday, 13th January. The final night before going to school.

Amber's Story

Amber had been finding it really hard to fall asleep. She was feeling overly anxious for some reason. Wondering if Adrienne was still awake she got out of bed. Amber walked to Adrienne's room hoping that she was still awake as well. Just outside the door, Amber heard something she hadn't heard in quite some time. Adrienne was singing. 'I forgot she could sing. But could she always sing like that? It's amazing.' Amber thought. She stepped closer to the door, pressed her ear to it, and listened a bit more. She wasn't sure if Adrienne would stop if she walked in. 'Would she even stop if I knocked? Maybe I should just stay here and listen.' She was still not sure what her relationship with Adrienne stood.

"... If you can hear me now I'm reaching out To let you know that you're not alone..." Adrienne's voice came softly from the other side of the door. "And if you can't tell I'm scared as hell 'Cause I can't get you on the telephone..."

She was singing just barely louder than the song itself. Amber decided to sit down against the door frame and listen to her sister singing. She recognized the song from one of their father's Nickelback albums.

"... Please let me take you Out of the darkness and into the light..." Before she knew it she was asleep on the floor outside leaning against both the door and its frame.

Adrienne's Story

"... So just close your eyes Well, honey here comes a lullaby Your very own lullaby..." Adrienne sat on her bed singing along to a cassette tape she had found, while she packed her things for tomorrow.

She had purposefully left all her packing for the last minute. She didn't want to face the fact that they were going back to that damned school. Not that she had anything against it really. She thought it was a great school, but it served as more of a painful reminder of a reality she hated. Going to school was going back to being ignored by Amber. Tonight was their last night at home. The last night Amber may actually treat her as a person. Adrienne finished her packing and decided to check if Amber was possibly still awake. She didn't bother checking the time because she knew the chance anyone was awake was slim. 'Just maybe she couldn't sleep.' She thought hopefully as she opened the door to leave her room. Except when she opened the door she found Amber asleep right outside. She quickly realized she had almost made Amber fall over. Adrienne crouched down to wake up her sister and keep her from falling over completely. 'And you call me the silly one.' She chuckled to herself.

"Amber? Amb, come on. You need to wake up." She shook Amber's shoulder gently.

Amber's room seemed a little too far for Adrienne to make her walk there half asleep and dazed. Even with Adrienne helping her it would have been a mission. 'What if she hit something on the way?' So instead Adrienne walked Amber over to her own bed and let her sister sleep there for the night. Knowing Amber would complain in the morning if she was on the floor. Both girls had double beds in their rooms, but Adrienne couldn't sleep next to Amber. Amber had a horrible habit of kicking people off beds since she was little. Adrienne made a comfortable enough bed on the floor for herself before going to sleep. 'Almost like when we used to camp out in our parent's room for the night.' She thought with a small smile before drifting off to sleep herself.

Sunday, 14th January. The final day before classes start.

Amber's Story

The next morning Amber found that she had been upgraded from the floor she remembered falling asleep on. It took her a while to realize that she was in Adrienne's bed and not her own. Her sister was curled up on the floor still asleep when she looked over the side. 'She gave up her bed for me. How stupid.' Amber rolled her eyes and chuckled. She got out of the bed and woke up Adrienne.

"Come on you big dummy. We've got to get ready to leave soon." She said shaking Adrienne.

Adrienne got up still a bit groggy, but her body started to work as if on autopilot. They both got ready pretty much in unison, moving around each other with surprising ease. Once they were all dressed and done in the bathroom Adrienne did Amber's hair, as usual, and then her own. By 8:15 am they were in the kitchen eating breakfast that Codey had prepared earlier.

"You girls are running late today," Codey said walking back into the kitchen.

"So are you, mister," Adrienne responded with a smile.

Amber grunted and walked out of the kitchen to sit outside. She never understood Adrienne's 'Father-Daughter' relationship with Codey. 'He's not our damn father.' She thought bitterly as she pulled out her phone and called Chloë. She had to find out how far away she was. Not wanting to spend another second at home. They always went with her because Codey owned a bike and neither of them had their license yet. The last time he drove the car was the day he took them home from the hospital. He had locked the car in the garage after that and they took a cab if they were going anywhere altogether.

*~*

The whole trip to school Adrienne had stared out of the window. Amber decided to ignore her and talk to her friend. Chloë was telling Amber how her holiday had been, but of course, couldn't finish her story because school really wasn't that far from where they stayed. They got to the school around 9:00 - 9:15. Amber and Chloë left the car without their bags. They made their way around the school grounds to familiarize themselves with the premises once again and then went to the hall. By this point, anyone with half a brain could conclude that Amber had forgotten she even had a sister. Or could it be that she was happy to get away from her instead?

Adrienne's Story

Adrienne went to fetch her bags from the boot as Chloë had left her car unlocked. The school grounds were a relatively secure place which allowed many students to leave cars unattended and unlocked. Without a second thought, she walked to where the main hall was, bags in tow. It was a place she had no desire to be near, or even inside of. They seated the students according to grate and surname so she would most definitely be next to Amber. What's more, knowing Amber, she would most definitely pretend no one was next to her. Adrienne placed her bags on the pavement outside the hall just as the first bell rang. She stood there against the wall and watched all the other returning students flood into the hall for their first assembly of the year. Amber and her other friends were among the few that went in before she did. She walked inside and sat down next to Amber since the teachers had instructed the others to leave that seat open for her. Dawn was placed on the other side of Amber though.

Adrienne felt like she was drowning when she sat next to Amber. Usually, she wasn't bothered by being ignored, but seeing as they seemed to be making amends over the holidays she was hoping this would not happen. Her usually glistening eyes turned dark as her hope was crushed. Her face became emotionless as memories haunted her mind. It all seemed like she was having major Deja Vu. This reminded her of their last assembly in their first year when Amber switched places with the person at the end of the row just to be far away from Adrienne. She turned to her sister feeling a little more helpless. She still hoped against logic that Amber wouldn't just shun her off again, but of course, that's exactly what Amber was doing. Even though in Adrienne's mind, they had a wonderful holiday together Amber didn't turn to glance in her direction once. In fact, she was acting like Adrienne wasn't even there. Adrienne went through six different emotions in a split second before she put on her mask and composed herself. She was hurt and it felt as if someone ripped off a band-aid and rubbed salt in the wound without a moment's hesitation or sympathy.

She fiddled with the ring she wore on her right index finger. A blue and silver band without any special gems or engravings. Her thoughts worsening with every second that ticked by. She clenched her teeth together as if barely hanging onto her self-control by a thread. She looked towards Amber again, but still, her sister showed her no acknowledgment whatsoever. Her anxiety was raising and her leg started to shake. 'Ten minutes. Adrienne really? It has just been 10 fucking minutes. Get a hold of yourself.' She scolded herself as the assembly went on and she fiddled more with her ring. 'Why are you never able to accept that this is how Amber is always going to be with you? Damnit can't you just stop trying to change the facts!' Although Adrienne had known this was bound to happen, it still managed to shatter her spirit.

The hour-long assembly made Adrienne feel like she was being tortured for no reason. She couldn't wait for the assembly to be finished so she could get out of there and be alone with a good book. She wanted to construct her mask carefully so it wouldn't crumble as it had in the past. 'Shit there's orientation. How could I forget about that?' She brushed the anger off telling herself that she would be better off being anywhere else as long as it wasn't near Amber and company. Even after all these years and fake smiles she still couldn't believe how her twin could just pretend that she didn't exist. 'Could the holidays really have meant nothing to her?' The thought troubled Adrienne more than she cared to admit. 'Just a few more minutes.' She told herself looking up at the clock for the hundredth time. 'A few more minutes and you won't have to worry so much about Amber till the holidays again.' She knew that last thought was a lie because Amber was still her twin sister and she could never pretend the opposite was true. She hated the idea of being an only child. At least she could never pull off being one as expertly as Amber did. Besides any of that, on a purely educational basis, Adrienne was bound to share at least one class with Amber. Their subject choices weren't that different after all. The bell rang again and Adrienne watched as Amber got up and left. She stayed seated because she was the head of the SRC and led the induction process for all the new students. As soon as Amber was out of sight, Adrienne physically and mentally relaxed.

Amber's Story

Amber's friend Dawn was talking nonstop about her holidays. The glitz and glam of it all. She demanded Amber's full attention and Amber didn't mind. She was at school after all and being at school meant no association with her 'loser' sister. Dawn got so lost in her story she didn't even care that the assembly had started and continued to talk. Luckily for her, they sat right at the back. Having a surname like Valderman had its advantages sometimes. The bell eventually rang for the end of the assembly and Amber just stood up. Dawn followed suit and they walked away. She didn't look back or say goodbye to Adrienne. 'She knows the holiday was just that a holiday. School is not the same as home.' The pair of girls met the rest of their group and all four walked to their dorm together. Obviously Amber left another friend, Sammy, to help Chloë with their bags from the car.

*~*

Amber took a shower and got ready for bed as Sammy was telling everyone about this new family that moved in across the road from her. They were apparently renovating the old house that kids used to run around in. The house had been abandoned for years.

"They're making it much more stylish than before. They just started on the outside like a week ago." Sammy had said.

She proceeded to explain that the kids used to be homeschooled. She also described how 'sexy' the older boy was. Time went by pretty fast and before the girls knew it, it was time for lights out. Dawn and Sammy managed to make it to their room just before the teacher came to check on them. Tomorrow school would officially start and it would be hours of classes followed by hours of homework and research. There would be little to no time for a good weekend. Well, at least that's what Amber figured the 'nerds' would be feeling. Amber was going to enjoy the last few hours she had before she'd start getting into trouble again and again. Which would then be followed by endless hours of detention she would not be bothered to attend.

Lullaby

Song By Nickelback

(2200 words)