MISTAKE

3 MONTHS AFTER THE ACCIDENT"

Ok, let me formally introduce myself my name is Fatima Mahmoud but people call me Zarah. I have an elder brother Ya Mahmoud, had an elder sister Ya Aisha but we called her Ummi but now she's late, Abba also my dad Mr. Yahya and Umma my mom Mrs. Hafsat.

My dad has a younger brother Uncle Kassim but we haven't seen him before and no one talks about him but honestly, I don't know why and in all honesty I don't care.

My best friend who has been with me since we were in diapers, the one, and only Hauwa who I haven't seen since high school.

My

elder brother schools in Turkey and hardly has any holidays so the last time we saw him was about a year ago, but we still skype and call every time.

My elder brother, well he is the son of my mom's elder sister Aunt Fatima but she died when Ya Mahmoud was just a baby and well his dad was nowhere to be found so my parents adopted him at least that's what they tell me.

They also told me after her death they gave birth to me so they named me after her that's why people don't call me Fatima, they just say Zarah. My parents are pretty much forgetting he exists cause they are always busy and hardly call or talk to him only when he visits calls them.

Ya Mahmoud doesn't care because he understands. He's just glad he has parental figures in his life.

I'm a Nigerian but I didn't grow up there so I do not know the country. I grew up in Egypt along with Hauwa but moved to Dubai when I finished High school.

My parents recently visited Egypt but none of us went along with them. I'm studying archaeology and boy is it one hard course.

Today is the first day I'm going back to college after my accident. I'm kinda nervous though. I ran down the stairs, "Umma I'm leaving" I screamed from the front porch.

"Wait," she said as soon as I turned to leave. she came out of the kitchen and signaled for me to come to the dining area. She was dressed in a suit probably about to go for one of her endless meetings.

As I entered the kitchen, there in front of her was a bowlful of yummy cinnamon rolls my favorite.

She gave me 1 and packed up a few for me. I placed them in my bag and she gave me a peck. "now you can go baby," she said laughing. I joined and laughed then I turned and left not before blowing a kiss to her.

As I entered the car.....my car, a 2020 honda accord. I took a deep breath running my hand along the surface of the car parts. I started the car, a small rumble escaped the car before I drove off.

After about thirty minutes of driving, I pulled the car to a stop at the school's parking lot. I exited the car, ahead read the school's signboard

"WELCOME TO SUGAR HILL COLLEGE"

"It feels good to be back " I murmured to no one in particular. At that moment the bell rang signaling the end of a period. Oh God first day back and I already missed a period. Ugh. "مولايَ صلي وسلم دائماً ابداً" my phone rang.

Yeah, that is my ringtone Mawlaya by Maher Zain. I picked the phone "Salam" I said "Wa-Alaikum-Salaam" a voice I haven't heard in a while replied "HAUWA!" "Lookup," she said I looked and my body went on autopilot opening the door and rushing to where she was standing, her phone pressed to her ear.

I eagerly hugged or more like jumped on her making us fall to the ground both of us laughing. "When were you enrolled here?" I asked through feats of laughter." A week or so ago" was her response.

I got off of her and stretched out my hand to pull her up. We dusted our bodies and walked hand in hand to our next class. English! my favorite.

Classes went by smoothly. At the end of the day, I invited her over to my house for dinner. We parted ways and I went home to prepare for our dinner.

My parents went to New York for a conference so we were alone. An hour later the doorbell rang. "Come in it's open" I screamed from the dining knowing who it was. I layed out all the goodies knowing she will be surprised.

As I predicted she came in and paused looking shocked to see all the goodies on the table.

She squealed and jumped on me nearly falling me to the ground. We sat down at the dining area discussing and catching up with the things I missed.

Oh did I mention we were taking the same course? At least that makes it easier and more fun. " Earth to Zarah, I said we have been talking for so long, why haven't I seen Ummi around," she said. She mentioned the one name no one says around me.

Shock! A sharp knife pierced my heart shredding it into a million pieces. I couldn't think straight, blood pounding in my head. My heart skipped more than a few beats.

I stopped, I couldn't move even if I tried, Hauwa shook me, I dropped to the ground tears rolling down my cheeks. She didn't know if only she did, a mistake Ya Rasulullah.

I gathered up the courage in me and there on the floor through sobs I told her everything. Her reaction was a reminder of old wounds buried deep down.

It hurts to look at her expression. Pity was written all over the one thing I hated. Everyone that knew what happened three months ago gave me the same look over and over again. I was sick and tired of it.

If only they knew what went on in my heart they would stop giving me that look. I shook my head over and over again trying to get rid of the image in my head.