Here we go again...

Kanae leans her back on one side of the restroom door with her arms crossed in front of her chest as she keeps an eye on Keiji. She started to get bored that she lost count of the times she glanced at her wristwatch.

She began to speak, “To be honest, you seem smarter than what I first thought about you.”

She seems surprised at her sudden initiative to start a conversation.

Keiji chuckles, “Your first impression sounds a bit insulting, but thanks anyway.”

“Though I guess, not smart enough to think about the 'obvious' consequences of skipping classes and smoking,” Kanae commented. She is not always that talkative, particularly to someone she just met but there is something about the atmosphere that awakens a different side of her now.

"If you will scold me like what my parents and teachers always do, you’re wasting your time.” He warned.

“I’m not," She defended, "Just wondering why guys like you do something that could potentially ruin your life or shorten it.” She added, out of her curiosity.

Keiji snorts, “We’re all going to die anyway, so might as well do the things that make me happy while I still can.” He reasoned out.

Kanae thinks he has a point, but that doesn’t mean she’ll get convinced with his illogical arguments.

“Causing troubles to others and ruining your health makes you happy?” She asked.

Kanae’s question hit something on Keiji, but he is prideful to admit that he was starting to lose in their argument. He tries to shift the subject instead, “Enough about me. How about you? Does having extra-responsibilities and having less freedom make you happy at all?”

Keiji’s words left Kanae thinking; being able to perform the tasks or duties that were assigned to her feels remarkably fulfilling, but is she really happy knowing she only does those things to please other people? Studying until midnight to get high grades and become one of the top students makes her parents proud. Helping her classmates with their homework even if most of them only talk to her when they need something makes her classmates happy. She even ran as a student council officer because it will make her teacher happy, or less disappointed at least. She fears that going against what others want would not make a good impression that why she always complies but how about her?

Is she really happy at all? She has always been considerate of others despite her tendency to be cold and aloof with people but has she ever been considerate about what she truly wants and what she truly feels? Maybe if she had become more selfish, she wouldn't have to deal with people like Keiji today.

The guy is starting to get under her skin, but it is no longer due to the fact that he stole her precious time for studying or lazing around her bed after school, more like due to the fact that Keiji, despite their few exchange of words, already made Kanae unexpectedly question some of her life choices.

Kanae hesitates to answer for a moment, “It’s… fulfilling on my part.”

Keiji nods, “Then it does not make you happy.” He confirmed, confident, based on his observations about Kanae.

“It’s not like that… Not entirely.” Kanae lowers her head and tone “Yeah, it probably does not make me completely happy but I’m not sad about it too. I don’t have any regrets.” Or so, Kanae wishes she really wouldn’t regret doing something not because she wants to but because others want her to.

“Why did you run for the position anyway? Doesn’t seem like you’re up to it the way your friend does.” He observed.

She was surprised to see that Keiji was also more observant than he appears to be.

“I had to,” Kanae replied as her gaze remains locked on the floor.

“To please other people?” He asked.

Keiji’s words hit harder than what he probably thinks of to her but Kanae wouldn’t allow herself to be vulnerable in front of a guy he just met.

“Let’s just say," She paused, "Needs weight more than wants. Even if you don’t want to do something, if you have to do it, and you can… then you should.” She explained.

Keiji remained silent, Kanae guessed he probably ran out of arguments to say or he no longer finds their conversation interesting. She thinks that she had said too much, something that wasn't like her; to let her emotions take over her mind, to begin with.

*****

Days have passed, true to her words, Kanae never told their student council adviser or any school authorities about the smoking incident, assuming that it would free her from watching over Keiji if ever he gets punished again. She thought she was safe when she kept it well, unfortunately, Saeko-sensei called in her office a week later.

“Sorry for calling you here again, but I do hope you understand,” Saeko-sensei said apologetically while sitting at her desk.

“Of course, sensei, I do. Don’t worry about it, it's my duty to begin with.” She replied reassuringly with a smile.

The student council is busy preparing reports and paperwork but since Kanae instantly finished her audit reports as the treasurer, being the ever responsible and well-performing student she was, she is currently the only student that Saeko-sensei could rely on.

“Keiji has caused trouble again,” Saeko-sensei groans in frustration.

'God, not this again.' Kanae thought, also whining, but mentally.

“Am I supposed to watch over him as he cleans the men’s restroom again, sensei?” She asked in anticipation.

“No, and yes, dear.” Saeko-sensei said sympathetically, “I mean, you will be in charge of watching him again but this time, it won’t be in the restroom. The Librarian asked me if I could find any students that could assist to arrange the new books in the library, and Keiji is the perfect candidate as his punishment.” She explained.

Kanae then bowed to bid goodbye to her as she doesn’t have any complaints or questions. Instead, she feels a sense of relief. The Library is her favorite spot among all other places on the campus. In the noisy, and draining atmosphere of the school, the library is her haven.

Kanae considered that the library is always been quiet during regular school hours, how much more after the majority of the students left. Aside from the fact that she’s surrounded by books which she finds better than being surrounded by people, it is a place where others wouldn’t judge or feel bad about her once they see her alone. It’s a place where she can sit for hours, without saying a word, and no one would think she is too quiet or weird. To a student like Kanae who excels in her studies but fears social interactions, a library is a perfect place.

She walks her way to the library but slows down her pace when she is near the entrance, and peaks into the door carefully. She immediately noticed Keiji, standing still, looking so immersed in a book he was reading that he didn’t even notice her on the front door.

Kanae finds it hard to admit but the sight in front of her is indeed fascinating.

Today is her first time to have a proper chance to observe his features, his jaw, his cheeks, his nose, his lips, everything about Keiji's physical appearance are great that she begins to figure out why Ritsu was so whipped of him, before she got ignored, that is. His eyes looked so sincere and lost in the book he was reading. He looks so charming by simply standing there, effortlessly.

Kanae shook her head, stopping herself from having such thoughts.

She rebuked herself, 'No, stop. Yes, he may be attractive, but it doesn’t mean, I’ll fall for him, having such features wouldn’t exempt him from the fact that he is an infamous troublemaker!'

She is a rational one that has self-rule of treating people fairly, regardless of their appearance, race, gender, and personality, she always applies this rule to anyone. Keiji being attractive wouldn’t let Kanae to turn a blind eye and overlook his mischief.

She clears her throat, preparing herself, before stepping forward to Keiji, “Looks like someone skipped his classes again.” She stated, grabbing his attention.

She noticed that Keiji was holding an astronomy book. Not everyone could get to see a naughty guy getting so lost in a book about stars, planets, and the universe on a normal basis so she finds the sight interesting.

Keiji closes the book and places it back on the shelves.

“Well, unfortunately, I’m not that someone.” He defended confidently that Kanae raised her eyebrow.

“I’ve reached my offense limit, if I skip classes again I’ll get suspended for two weeks.” He explained as he got her silent question.

“So what did you do this time?” She asked.

“Just constantly late for like days, or weeks? I don’t know I’ve lost count, and my teachers have also lost their patience.” He shrugged, nonchalantly. He starts picking up some of the new books from the box to arrange them on the shelves.

“I think you’re not dumb enough to realize that every time you get punished, I get punished too.” Kanae walks over near him, lazily to help him organize the books as she wants to go home sooner.

Keiji smirks, amused, “Of course, I knew that.”

“Can you do me a favor then, and start fixing your life for our sake?” She stated.

Keiji studies for a while, “Why don’t you just ask Saeko-sensei to let others take charge instead?” He suggested as he understood why Kanae asked him that favor. He knows she is a bit annoyed by him.

Kanae sighs, “It is not that easy.” She defended.

“You care so much about what people think,” Keiji commented.

Kanae wanted to argue that he doesn’t know anything being someone who doesn't give a damn about what people will think of him. Instead, she remained silent. She hates to admit it, but Keiji was indeed right.