(9)

Jillian was seated at a private booth reading when Nathaniel walked into Emilie's, a french style bistro on stevens and fourth.

She lifted up her head as he walked up to her and went back to her book without so much as an acknowledgement.

He sat across from her and cleared his throat but she still didn't say a word.

Finally, he broke the silence,determined to put himself out of the misery he created.

I can't do this anymore, Nathaniel said suddenly.

You can't do what anymore,she asked him finally looking up from her book.

This, he said gesturing between them. Whatever we have going on right now he concluded.

You can't be serious she scoffed. We had a deal Nate.

I don't care about your deal he said.

My deal? What is wrong with you she questioned.

You want to know what's wrong with me he asked incredulously.

Are you being serious right now? I had an accident Jillian.

I know that Nate she replied rolling her eyes.

I was unconscious in the hospital for months Nate continued as if he hadn't heard her. I almost died and you never showed up. You never stopped by to see me.

You were unconscious she teased. How do you know I didn't visit you?

Luisa would have told me if you did, he tossed back.

Luisa never liked me Jillian insisted. How can you be sure she wasn't lying to you.

Jillian...he sighed.

Fine.. Can you just chill already she admitted.

I didn't visit you okay? I was busy. I had a business trip and stuff. You know how important getting Grandpappy's approval is to me. I couldn't let him think I was weak. I'm your wife Nathaniel. You are supposed to support me...be understanding. How could you get in an accident at such a crucial time.

Are you seriously uttering this nonsense, he scoffed.

I'm sorry Jillian. I'm sorry my accident was such an inconvenience to you he replied sarcastically.

You know what. I'm done okay? I've had enough of this charade.

Oh no honey... Jillian began in a sickeningly sweet tone. We are done when I say we are.

The deal was to have grandpappy and the board see me as a trustworthy and capable business woman who also excels in her home life as a wife in order for the company to be handed over to me,as his only descendant and rightful heir and it hasn't happened yet.

You are being really selfish Nate began.

Really Nate she shot back.

This partnership is beneficial to you too. I mean,not only does it ensure that you have millions of dollars in your account but it also ensures that you are no longer the pathetic, heartbroken man who was willing to throw his life away because he got dumped.

"I didn't get dumped" Nate said in a small voice.

Exactly! It's not like she ever confessed her undying love for you...

She did confess to loving me Jillian he retorted.

But she still left you Jillian replied. Whatever she admitted to feeling for you wasn't enough to make her stay but you were willing to drink your life away...

I saved your life Nate. I gave you a second chance and you are going to throw it all away. For what? A near death experience?

I saw her again Jillian he suddenly said. She was even more beautiful than I remember.

In your dreams she teased.

"You saw her when your life was flashing before your eyes?"

I'm serious Jillian he said. I saw her at the center. She saved my life.

Oh! Jillian scoffed. How romantic!

Was it how you always dreamed it would be?

Did she admit she was wrong in leaving you?

No he began slowly.

She seemed happy....

"Happily single?"Jillian asked.

Happily married he replied.

Look, I'm sorry Nate but this is the exact reason why we can't end this. You don't want her to think you've been pining for her all these years. Do you? It would make you look pathetic and miserable.

I guess you are right Jillian....

Of course I'm right. So, when will you be discharged? The house has been a mess since the accident.

You never change he stated simply.

No,I don't. And that's why you agreed to marry me because you know that I will never fall in love with you. Love is for losers and weak minded people.

And that is why I will never fall in love with you Jillian... because you are not worth it.

And Henry is? Happily married Henry?

It's Henri he corrected. H.E.N.R.I. It's actually Henriette.

I know Nathaniel. I just like messing with you.

Why do you even love her so much? You just said she's married. Happily married at that.

She's never going to love you.

She's never going to be with you.

Still, you have her on this pedestal.

I mean,why her?

That's the question I keep asking myself Jillian.

I'm yet to find the answer and maybe I never will but it's okay... because I was able to love her.

FLASH BACK...

Do you still love him Henri?

Auguste she called....

Are you still in love with Nathaniel he asked.

It's okay if you are. I....I just want to know.

Honey...she sighed.

I need you to be honest with me okay he began.

I'm your best friend,first and foremost. I will always be on your side Henri. So, if you are still in love with him. I'll let you go. You don't have to worry about me being clingy.

Auguste she begins. I need you to listen to me and I need you to hear me when I say this....

I am not in love with Nathaniel.

I am in love with you.

Auguste,i love you. More than anything. You are my world.

Then why Henri? Why did you leave me?

Because i was scared....

You were scared of me? Of being with me?

No! Honey no. I wasn't. I could never be scared of you. I want to be with you.

Then what? He asked. Trying to understand what she means.

I was scared that you were going to wake up one day and realize you deserved better than me.

What? Henya, you are not making any sense.

You... have never needed more than I could give you.. not until recently.

Sweetheart, I have never asked for more than you have given me he said.

Baby...you want children.

I can see it in your eyes. And I know in my heart that you would be an amazing father.

But me? I'm not so sure and when we thought that I might be pregnant, I could see the hope in your eyes. We'd been trying for so long and just the thought that we could have that. I saw how much you wanted that. I also saw the light dim from your eyes when it didn't take.

You don't want a baby. Is that it? Is that why you...

No! Gussie, I want to have babies with you. I want to be the mother of your children.

Little versions of you and me.. perfectly mixed. I want that.

I want that too Henri.

But what if I can't give you children? What it I can't have your babies?

Is that why you gave up on us?

We can take our time, think of other options. I don't want babies..not unless they are coming from you. All I need is you.

Don't you hate me Gus?

Honey, I could never hate you. Is it too late to ask you to withdraw the paperwork for the divorce?

I...I never actually sent them.

Why is that Henya?

I couldn't bring myself to do it. It felt too final.

I love you Auguste Theodore Moreau.

I love you Henriette Marie Moreau.