Ten

All throughout work the following day, the only thing that was on my mind was the impending confrontation with Shibata-kun. I had managed to work my way around it the other day but there was no way I could play it off again. I could do it, but I did not want to. It wasn't fair to him, if anything.

No matter how much I tried not to think about him, I couldn't stop myself. All this while, watching from afar and exchanging a few words had worked for me but seeing him make a move like that despite not really knowing me... Time being rewritten had not completely erased me from his heart. That spoke a lot about how much he valued me. We were so close that the very act of serving him OUR blueberry cheesecake hurt me.

But that was just me. I was feeling miserable despite being fully aware of what exactly was going on. He was convinced that he knew me and he was trying so hard to be with me but he didn't even know why. I could not even begin to imagine how confusing all this may be for him.

I missed him terribly.

I missed us.

I massaged the bridge of my nose. The urge to cry had stung me pretty bad. My neck hurt but I really couldn't do anything about it other than to calm the torrent of emotions in my head down.

Even if Terasaki-san had said that he would do his best to protect us, I couldn't even imagine putting Shibata-kun in danger. If staying away from him meant that he would be unhurt, I thought that I could stay away but that was way proving to be way too painful for the both of us.

What was the right thing to do then?

No matter what I decided though, I knew him best. He was the persistent kind and I was too weak to him. Pushing him away might just have driven us closer.

"Thank you for your good work." Matsumoto-san saw us off after work. I was a nervous wreck. I couldn't run from this.

Shibata-kun was waiting outside, just as he had been the previous day. He smiled on seeing me. "Hey."

"Hi." I nodded. My heart raced- I couldn't tell if it was the nerves because of the confrontation or if it was because it was Shibata-kun.

"I'll go ahead." Terasaki-san told me and proceeded to walk ahead. I took a deep breath and turned to Shibata-kun. There was no walking away now. This had to be done.

"Let's go?" I smiled. What I really wanted to do though was to jump into his arms and cry, holding on so tight that even time would be unable to slip through my fingers.

"Yes." He nodded and we began walking side-by-side in the direction of home. The ache of my heart was far too prominent at this point to ignore. We were so close and yet... "That man." He spoke up as he stared ahead at Terasaki-san's back. "Who is he? He's always with you."

"He's my guardian." I replied.

"Your guardian? So, you're living away from home?"

Uh... "Yeah. He's, uh, my cousin." No. I did not want to lie. I did not want to lie anymore!

"Your cousin. I see." His features softened a little. Eventually, he turned his attention to me. "You really don't mind, do you, Kirishima-chan?"

How could I possibly mind your company, Shibata-kun? Just then though... While it made me happy that you hadn't forgotten me, I couldn't help but wish that things had been different. I was in no position to judge one situation as being better than the other but had you forgotten about me, it would not have been this hard for us. "No. It's alright."

Nevertheless, we were walking beside each other just then. All that torrent was just in my head. The reality was that he was with me and we were talking. Why not savour it while it lasts then?

"That's a relief." He let out a sigh. "I thought that maybe I was being a little pushy."

Savour it while it lasts.

"I don't mind this at all."

"Why do I get the feeling that you're going to say a 'but'?" He furrowed his brows, a troubled smile playing on his lips.

He definitely knew what to expect from me. "But it would be better to leave me be."

"What do you mean?" He frowned.

"No. There are things that... I can't tell you." I had to lie again. "Family... stuff... It would be better if we stayed just a customer and a café employee."

"Are you engaged to that man?" He motioned towards Terasaki-san.

"What? No." I replied, surprised by the question.

"He's always around you so..." He cleared his throat. "Heir to a huge business and have enemies?"

Hah? "N-No-" But then again... let's go with that. "S-Something like that, I guess..."

"I see." He rubbed his chin. "Is there a man involved? Like, a prospective husband or someone?"

You're not holding back at all, are you? "Uh... No..."

"Then it's fine, isn't it? We'll be friends as far as they know. For now. And enemies... I can hold my own just fine."

I had a feeling that he'd say that. "Why would you do all that for me?" I knew why but I wanted to know why he thought he was doing it.

"Because I really like you." He replied. "I don't know why but I keep feeling that I've met you before and I know you but... It's weird. Aw, man. This sounds so cheesy... I feel strangely empty most of the time when you're not around."

I feel so too.

I settled for a wry smile.

"I sound like a creep, don't I?" He chuckled.

"A little." I nodded.

"I'm not though. I'm a decent guy." He said, straightening his posture a bit.

I know.

"You're a college student, right?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"Yes, I am."

"Which course?"

"Economics."

I wanted to tell him everything. We met in college. I was your classmate. I used to sit right beside you in class. I was your go-to person- your unpronounced important person. "Eco, huh?"

"I can't stand Statistics though. It's fun and I'm good at it but I don't see any reason to sit in class for statistics." He shrugged, then grinned at me. "I bunk. I would've come to the café whenever I bunk but your shift starts later."

"I thought you came for the blueberry cheesecake." Listening to him talk like that, putting everything else aside, I was having fun. I was happy. I felt all warm and fuzzy within.

"That too." He shrugged.

I looked ahead, watching Terasaki-san.

It was unfair.

"Kirishima-chan, we can be friends, right? I don't want to force you or anything but-"

"We can." I interjected. I missed you. We could've been more than friends too had I had a little more time. "But this is as far as we can get involved with each other. I'm sorry."

"Hm. Well, it's a start." He shrugged. "I just feel like this is something I have to do. I want to do it too."

Shibata-kun...

"Miyazono." Terasaki-san stopped a little ahead of us and called when we reached him. "This is as far as you go."

Shibata-kun nodded and addressed me. "We'll figure this out."

What could I do but return a smile?

"I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Okay."

It hurt.

"Great." He locked eyes with me, smiled and nodded to Terasaki-san before leaving. I had never given it much thought before when we used to interact, mess around and spend time with each other before. Watching him walk away hurt so much now that I realised exactly what it meant to have had him by my side. It made me realise how important the person Miyazono Shibata was to me.

"Terasaki-san." I placed a hand over my aching chest, ignoring my neck. "I want to quit."

"The café?" He watched me.

"Yes." As much as it hurt, this couldn't go on. "I can't keep away on my own. He won't give up either." I looked at him. "Continuing to work there won't do any of us any good. I can't get him involved in this."

He continued watching me, as if searching my eyes for any signs of hesitation. I had made up my mind though. This little time that I had managed to get with him, cheating fate as I felt we were, had made me come to my decision.

I loved him.

"I understand." He nodded and placed a hand on my back, urging me to walk. "I'll talk to them tomorrow. You don't need to come."

I was running away from the man I loved.

"Thank you."

"You'll be fine." He said. "Let's stop by the convenience store. Buy whatever you want."

I let out a small laugh. "You can be really sweet sometimes."

"I'm merely doing my duty." He said.

Either way, I'm glad I have at least you and Chiyo. If I'm choosing to walk away from Shibata-kun, I needed all the support that I could possibly get.