Self-Hate

Chapter 7

Hospital

Kayden's POV:

If Kai had not been in serious pain, then I probably would've stayed there on the ground in shock. I knew Kai was hiding some kind of injuries, but I didn't know it would be to this extent!

How could someone do that to him?! The image of Kai with his body littered with scars was permanently stuck in my head. I can't even imagine what kind of pain he must have gone through to end up like the way he was.

I moved Kai gently off the ground and towards my car. I could tell Kayden was trying not to show how hurt he was, but I could tell he was in pain. His ears were folded down, and every once in a while a few whimpers would escape him. As I set him down in the car he asked, "Kayden… where are you taking me…?" "I'm taking you to the hospital obviously!" I said as I slammed the car door and headed towards the drivers seat of the car. "No! You can't! I-I'm fine, really. I'm just clumsy and ended up like this. I'll be better in a few days time…" "Kai, no matter what you try to say, I'm taking you to the hospital. Me and you both know those injuries weren't from you being clumsy either." I said as I backed out of the driveway. Kai tried opening his mouth again to say something, but closed it again after a second. 'I'm sorry Kai, but I can't handle seeing you hurt. I'm supposed to protect you.'

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Kai's POV:

I sat in the backseat while Kayden was driving me to the one place I was never allowed to go to. The pain had all caught up to me, and it felt like someone was stabbing my insides over and over again. I tried hard not to let any whimpers out, but occasionally I couldn't help it. 'I'm so pathetic. He saw everything… everything they did to me over the years. Everything he did to me.' My wolf was whimpering in my head repeatedly, and it was starting to give me a headache. I hated being so weak, not having any way to defend myself. If someone even looked at me the wrong way, I would submit to them immediately. It's all because I was an omega. Maybe if I wasn't, maybe people would like me more. Maybe if he didn't do those things to me, maybe I'd learn not to be so weak and flinch at everything. But life just wasn't that easy for me. 'Why isn't Kayden repulsed by me? He saw everything. I'm repulsed by it, and everyone else says it makes me look weak, pathetic, and ugly. That no one would like me for all of my scars. He probably just feels pity for me. He'll leave after he drops me off most likely. This realization had me and my wolf suddenly depressed. 'I don't know what I was expecting anyways. They always leave eventually. Why do I even care? Why is it making me sad at the thought that he might leave? I thought I learned by now not to get attached to people. That the only purpose I have in life is to be used by others. That I'm a disgusting mutt that no one would ever want or need in their lives. Someone that no one would ever love or care for. I've only had love for a short while in life, and even that was taken away from me. And it's all my fault. I'm not someone deserving of Kayden. So why do I care? He should find someone better than me. Why did I even think I had a chance? He's obviously just doing this because he either feels sympathy for me, or the more reasonable option, he wants to use me like everyone else.