Azura

The next morning I woke up before dawn and decided to keep my promise to Mr. Giant, and give school another go.

Right now I’m in the car with Max, on my way to school, and he is beyond pissed off. When I told him that I was going to school today saying he was shocked would be an understatement. He was so angry that he hasn’t spoken a word to me since I broke the news to him.

I tap him to try and sign to him but he just ignores me, which I find very hurtful because unless somebody is looking at me, I can’t let them know that I am talking to them until I tap them. My decision to become mute was something I decided on my own, but also something that they accepted. Max knows that I’m trying to say something to him, and him completely ignoring me, hurts me more than my nightmares do.

I tap him again, but this time almost as hard as a slap, to let him know that what I want to say is important. Yet again, ignored. I try again and again to get his attention for about a minute before I get upset.

Me now being fed up, I grab the steering wheel and try to force him to pull over the car.

“What the hell, Azura! What are you doing, trying to get us killed?” he yells while alternating his gaze from the road and me, all whilst leveling out the car.

“Pull. Over.” Those were the only words I signed to him.

“What? No! No, I’m not pulling over. Why?”

“Pull. Over.” I sign again, but slower to show my anger.

He lets out an animalistic groan and pulls the Wrangler over, I then hop out and continue my route to school on foot.

Max, who also hoped out the Jeep, is calling after me with fever.

“Azura! A-Azura, wait! Where are you going?”

I turned around, walking backwards and signed that I was going to school and then turned right back around.

I hadn’t walked even two steps before a hand clasps my shoulder and is forcing me to turn around again. I am met with the fury burning in Max’s eyes as he glares at me.

“What is wrong with you?” he asks, his voice menacingly low.

“What is wrong with you? I know you don’t like that I decided to go back to school, but get over it!” I signed for him. Without even having to look at myself, I could tell I looked like a flailing bird, my arms moving around so much proving my anger.

“Why did you decide to go back? You have enough credits to graduate right now! Why not graduate and save yourself the pain of stupid highschool drama and bullying?”

“I want to be normal!” I sign, a single tear betraying me, I wipe it away quickly.

I could tell he saw the tear fall because all his anger and disbelief subsided and was replaced with realization that I was crying, and it was because of him.

By now the tears are flowing a bit more, but the sobs are silent. Max reaches towards me, hands cupping my face, and wipes the tears away as they fall.

“Azzy… c’mon, don’t cry. I-I’m sorry. I went overboard. You can go to school, okay? Just stop crying.”

I nodded while Max wiped away my remaining tears. I was so angry and frustrated the tears just fell. I know Max only wants to protect me, but what happens when I decide to move out? Will I not be able to because I’ve grown too dependent on my family? No, I don’t want that to be the case, I have to make him understand and accept that.

“Let’s go back in the car, there, you can tell me how you feel, and I’ll listen, okay?” Max suggests, bringing me out of my thoughts. I gave him a nod and we started walking back to his car. Once inside he turns the car on and starts driving again.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“Cafe. To talk.” was all he said.

“What about school?” I asked.

“Simple, you are going in late.” he answered with no expression on his face and without looking at me.

It only took about 5 minutes to reach a cozy looking cafe that was near the carover of the street. Max parks the car and we head into the cafe, grabbing a seat in front of a window. The cafe was beautiful, I could already tell from the outside but the inside just fits everything together. The tables were made of a type of waxed wood and the Tolix style metal chairs added a bit of a more cabin-y feel to the place, it was very calming. I definitely see myself coming here to read on a rainy day.

After the waiter had come to take our orders, Max continued to avoid eye contact and I stared out the window. When our order came I gave a sincere smile to show my thanks and Max muttered a small thanks. It tends to be hard for me to order things when we go out to a restaurant because of the obvious fact that I don’t talk, so Max usually orders something for me. I hadn’t expected Max to order something for me but I was proven wrong when a powdered donut was placed in front of me. I looked up at Max and saw that he had been staring at me but looked away quickly. I smiled at his cuteness.

“Sorry that I made you cry. I was being too much, I’ll tone it down. Forgive me?” he said with a bit of a pout.

“I appreciate it a lot Max, and yes, I forgive you.” I sign and then take a bite out of my donut.

After the chat with Max, he dropped me off at school saying he’d be here to pick me up later. I ended up being an hour and a half late to classes but it’s totally okay, please note my sarcasm. I ended up having to go to those classes to get the work I had missed, and as you could guess, not many were glad to see me. After getting all the work I missed, I headed to math which I now realize, Lily, Jazzmine’s friend is also in that class. I head to my seat and I could feel someone burning holes in the back of my head. When I sat down, I looked up and made eye contact with Lily, she just cocked her head to the side and smiled. I returned a tight-lipped smile back to her and looked out the window, I didn’t look at anyone for the entire period.

When class was over, I checked my schedule to see the weirdest thing ever, I have gym for the next three periods! What the heck kind of crap is that? Now don’t get me wrong, I’m a pretty good athlete, given my situation, but what are we going to do for two and a half hours?

I head in the direction of the ladies locker room and I can say with confidence, the girls were loud. I could hear one girl asking for perfume, another asking for lip gloss, a girl had lost her shoe, another her phone, the only thing that would make this situation more cliche would be if I walked in and all the commotion dwindled down to side eyed glares and whispers.

Law of attraction is real, whatever you put out will definitely come true, whether it’s sooner or later, in my case it was sooner. Sooner meaning as soon as I opened the door my cliche scenario was put into action.

No one was speaking, all you could hear was the air blowing in from the rusting vents. I walked into the room and everyone’s eyes just followed me, I walked around to the empty spots that were close to the door, but everytime I found a good spot, the girls near it would place their bags there, silently telling me that I’m not welcome. When I finally found a spot, it was away from the other girls, a dimly lit back corner of the locker room. I didn't change my clothes, I kept the oversized mint green crew neck sweater, black athletic leggings, and maroon Dr. Martens boots that I wore and headed out to the field, eyes continuing to burn holes in the back of my head as I left.

When I got to the field, I could see a large crowd of giants in a huddle on the tarp. They were most likely the boys that were on the football team; jocks with crazy amounts of muscle.

I won’t say I know football as if I were a player, but I’m not ignorant in it either, I know that touch downs are six points, you run or pass the ball to get the extra point, and I know that a good kick is three points, that is about it. The only reason I know all of this is because of my best and only friends who live in Nutrale.

The teacher shouts for everyone to round up which brings me out of my football mental path.

“Alright, shuddap! The name is Myers, but just call me coach, you do that and we’re good, got that? Alright then, let’s get started. ” He announces using his teacher's voice.

He started calling off names of the other students and it was entertaining because he’d call us off as if hre were a drill sergeant in the army, calling us by last name. I knew that it was going to take a while before he got to my name because I have the ‘S’ for Sparrows.

“Boyd, girl!” the coach shouted.

“Here!” It was Jazzmine who responded.

Huh, her last name is Boyd, the more you know, I guess.

“Boyd, boy!” I believe his name was Alex, if I remember correctly.

Wait, how am I going to let him know I’m here when I won’t verbally say here? Coach was going down the list faster than deer running away from being hunted, then finally, it was my turn.

“Sparrows?” he seemed confused, eyebrows furrowed, and for the first time since he started he looked up from his clipboard. He glanced to his right first, scanning the crowd, looking for me, I was on his left side.

“Anyone know whether Sparrows is a boy or girl?” he questioned the crowd finally glancing over to his left. I raised my hand and he called on me.

“You Sparrows?” he asked, a gruffness in his voice that my neighbor would kill for.

I nodded my head avoiding eye contact with everyone, they were all staring at me, I could feel my hand getting clammy causing me to awkwardly interlock my fingers for self comfort. He nodded and continued to finish calling names.

“Now that's done, today is an easy class, complete one mile, four laps on the track, that’s it. I don’t care how you do it, i f you want to run it, walk it, hell for all I care, skip the damn mile, just do it. You have three hours, more than possible. After you finish that, you can do whatever you want. Okay, go!” When he dismissed us I walked up to him and waited for him to look up from his clipboard.

Coach looked up and I handed him a piece of paper that read: I am the new student, Azura. I am deaf and mute.

His eyebrows rose up and he glanced down at me, probably to see if I was lying about being disabled. So, I tucked my hair behind one of my ears to show him my hearing aid.

He gave a slow nod, and right when he was about to talk, the boys that were huddled up at the beginning of class had jogged up to the coach. I quickly unhooked my hair from behind my ear and started staring at the ground. I could hear all of them saying they had completed the mile and wanted to practice some drills. I started walking away to go and run the mile, I glanced back to see that the coach was staring at me like he wanted to say something, but I wasn’t going to go back over there, I don’t like being crowded in space where crowding isn’t necessary.

After about 10 minutes, I complete the mile and go to sit on the bleachers right under the commentary box, I whip out my sketch pad, turn off my hearing aids, and aimlessly doodle.

About 20 minutes into my doodle drawing, I see a hand swipe across my line of vision, my head shoots up and I see a beautiful creature with fire for hair and blinding emeralds for eyes. The way she held herself made her ooze with confidence, my eyes noticed her eyes that were emboldened by the thickness of her eyeliner. She wore simple black jeans, a white tank top and a hunter green leather jacket that had an array of decorative pins along her shoulders. Her lipstick was a daring noir, eyeshadow a modest neutral palate, blush was non existent.

“Yo, you the new kid from Cresent?” she suddenly asked. Her voice was much more serene than I had imagined based on her poise.

I hadn’t realised that I had been staring so I stiffly nodded my head, a bit apprehensive because the last time someone came up to me, I got my head smashed into a desk.

She thrusts her hand out towards me and I flinch a bit, I look up at her confused and she goes, “What’s up, my name is Clem, You and me?” she says pointing at the both of us, “We are friends. Cool? Cool.” she says nonchalantly. Before I could even think of something to say to her, she plops herself down next to me, rests her head on my shoulder, and pulls out her phone to play Flappy Bird.

I turn my head in amazement, does she have no shame or does she just have an abnormal amount of confidence under her belt?

After my initial shock subsides, I realize that I have a friend! I do a little happy foot move which alarms Clem, she flinches up and looks at me as if I just had a seizure.

“You good, Ivy?” she asks with a smirk.

I started signing that I was so excited and happy that she chose to be my friend but when I calmed down to look at her, she was looking at me like I was a lunatic. SHe must not know sign language, I thought. I turn the page in my sketchbook and write a simple: Why choose me to be your friend, and why Ivy?

It only took her a few seconds to read it before she started responding.

“Alright, Ivy, one thing you should know about me is that I don’t care for rumors or stigmas put on people. I take the time to get to know somebody before I judge them or label them, and even then I don’t like doing it because it’s rude. I don’t care if you’re from Cresent or from Lunar, hell, you could be from the moon and I would still get to know you before calling you “astro girl”, just basic decency.”

Honestly, I am surprised because I wasn’t expecting that, and I feel bad because I stigmatized her based on how she looks, and didn’t expect such a real answer.

“Secondly, Ivy is what I will call you from now on. Why? Simply because your eyes are so gorgeously blue, and that’s the name of Beyonce’s daughter.” she continued.

We communicated through paper and pen for a little while longer until I became visibly uncomfortable with the stares and whispers coming from others on the field. Clem notices me and asks if I’m okay, I nod, grabbing a piece of paper I write: Are you sure you want to be my friend? People will talk badly about you.

Clem reads my comment and gets up and starts walking up the bleachers, heading to the commentary box. The coach is yelling her name from the field, asking her what she is planning, she ignores him and proceeds to head to the commentary box. She somehow manages to get inside and starts pushing an array of buttons and switches, eventually turning on the microphone, she then proceeds to start speaking.

“Hey, I understand that all of you are nosy, judgemental, and annoying people, but you really should mind your own damn business. I don’t care that she is from Cresent, the attack has been over for years and people still have their panties in a bunch over it. She, herself, did not hurt us, so why hurt her?” she storms out of the box and plops down next to me again.

Everyone was taken aback by Clem, even me. I truly hadn’t expected her to stand up for me, but she did and it warmed my heart. She knows where I’m from and still chooses to be friends with me and on top of that she defends me when I was feeling uncomfortable.

I think I can honestly say, with no hesitation in my heart, that she and I are going to make great friends.