Funeral

I stood in front of mom's picture in my black knee length dress and my hair falling down in their natural brown waves.

I saw few people standing and saying words about my mother being a good person, but my mind could not register any of them. All that I did was nod to the people who came to me or give a sad smile in return to their sympathy. At least I tried to smile even a sad one.

"..She was a very strong fellow, " I heard a woman in her mid fifties saying with a sad voice.

She came down to me in her black pencil skirt as if some business attire.

"You are Alicia?" She asked with a warm smile.

I assessed her and nodded slowly.

"I'm Melinda Jonas," she said offering me her hand. I shook her hand confused again not recalling who she was.

"I used to be her best-friend, but we lost contact few years ago." She explained seeing my confusion.

"Thank you for coming Mrs. Jonas." I said in a small voice.

She offered me a smile again and said, "Here is my card call me if you need any help." She handed me her card.

"I have some meetings to attend," she told me nodding her head.

I nodded, and offered her a sad smile once again not being able to comprehend anything that was happening to me or in my surroundings.

I watched her retreating back as she walked out off the church.

"Let's get you something to eat you have not eaten something since yesterday. " Damon said putting an arm on my shoulders and moving out of the place.

I felt a clog forming in my throat again. I stopped dead in track again.

"Alicia, You have to take care of yourself as well." He said in a caring soft tone.

I felt my eyes again welling with tears. But I closed them in order to stop anymore tears to come out. These show weakness and I'm not weak. I shook my head, and started walking again.

"Let's go," he said again taking me to his car in the parking lot.

"Ahh, your friend Savannah was here few minutes ago. But she had to leave because of some emergency so she said that she will meet you in few hours again." Damon explained opening the door for me.

I was about to get in when I heard some shrill voice calling after me, "Alicia," I turned to see Ms. Williams making her way towards me, one of the nurses who used to attend mom in the hospital.

"How are you holding up kid?" She asked me in a motherly tone as she usually used to do.

"I have been better," I said nonchalantly shrugging. She gave me a pat and took out a folded paper from her black leather bag,

"Here," I took the paper from her looking at the paper.

"Your mother left it for you, she asked me to hand it to you." She explained to me.

I looked at her now, and nodded at her.

"I'll let you go now, take care." she said going away from me.

"Thank you Ms. Williams, " Damon said after her.

I sat in the passenger seat and closed the door behind me. Damon came and started to drive the car himself.

I kept on staring on the letter and scratching it with my thumb nail.

"Aren't you going to read it?" Damon looked at me and then at the road driving ahead to some cafe or somewhere to eat I could not care in the least.

"I will," I trailed off. "After some time I will." I told him.

He nodded and I again looked at the letter trying to think what would she have to say? What would she tell me? would she be happy with me? Would she be sad for leaving me? Number of questions kept on coming in my mind.

"What would you like to eat?" Damon asked stopping in front of the McDonald's.

"Huh?" I asked him fazed out. "What would you like to eat?" He repeated.

I looked around to find us sitting in the McDonald's driveway.

"Anything can do." I said nonchalantly.

It has been few moments since Damon has gone to buy something to eat. I kept on looking at my phone, checking my messages.

"Why is not he answering?" It has been a whole day I have trying to reach Jason but every time it's the same answer.

I again dialed his number,

"The number you have dialed is switched off, leave your message after the beep,"

I hung up the phone.

"He is not responding?" Damon's voice asked me handing me a bucket of wings and a burger with some cold drink.

I took the food from him and uncovered the burger to eat it.

Damon took my silence as an answer and reassured me.

"He must be busy, don't worry he will call you soon."

I nodded sadly and kept on eating. After Damon's thousand trial of making me talk he ended up dropping me off at dorms.

"Thank you," I thanked him genuinely.

"Don't worry about it, just call me whenever you need me, okay?" He asked raising his brow.

I gave him a small smile, because him being with me right now made me feel a little happy even in the saddest moment of my life. It was the moment I used to think that I would die with her.

I never thought I would be able to survive without her. But here I'm standing in my room now with no one but my dark life in a dark small room.

I felt all the tears coming out and a silent sob leaving my mouth.

I sat down on the bed with tears running down my cheeks violently.

"Why mom? Why?" I kept on chanting.

I sniffled and opened the letter that she had left for me with tears still covering my cheeks.

"Hey Baby,

I hope you are holding up just fine. I know you must be reading it when I will be gone. That's why I'm writing this to tell you that You Have to Be Strong my princess. "

I felt tears moving down I started wiping them feverishly. And kept on reading it

"I don't know if you have gone to Harvard or you still have not. But you know I was over the moon when I got to know that you received your acceptance letter, but lemme tell you I already knew you would receive one. After all you are genius like your mother, right?" I chuckled with sadness engulfing me.

"But if I'm not around and you have not gone there yet, listen up baby, I want you to be happy and crying over me now is not going to help you. Be happy for me that I don't have to endure pain everyday. I would not have to burden you. I know you are very caring and sensitive girl. Please take care of yourself for me? Promise me you would? I'm rooting for you from up there. Don't ever feel alone I'll always be by your side. Just smile always don't you ever feel weak, because I know you can win everything you work for.

Regards,

From your loving mother who could not be with you."

I wiped all my tears and mumbled.

"I wish I can be as strong as you think of me."