Chapter Forty Two - The S-Class Trials... Begin!

Konata lounged in bed, staring at the ceiling. What was next in the plot? She squinched her eyes shut as she tried to recall. Edolas, then... oh yeah.

She hopped out of bed, wandering over to Lee's room lazily. "Hey, Erza," she called out. Erza was watching Lee pound Juvia into the bed because she was a big old cuckquean or whatever. Her hands were clasped in front of her because she didn't even masturbate when she was watching Lee fuck. "I need to talk to you for a sec. Keep going, Lee! Fuck Juvia so hard all her jealousy melts out through her pussy!"

"My beloved Lee! Tell that hussy Konata, that I most certainly am not jealous of her in any way!" Juvia demanded of Lee - Konata just grabbed Erza's wrist and lightly dragged her out of the room.

"What is it, Konata?" Erza said, already shifting from 'horny monkey watching her boyfriend fuck' to 'serious battle maiden.' It was pretty impressive, when you got right down to it.

"Oh, right, it's about the S-Class trials that are coming up," Konata said. "Okay. So, number one, there's an immortal kiiiinda-evil wizard on Tenrou Island right now. Then Grimoire Heart's gonna show up to try and kidnap him." She stuck one finger in her ear, wiggling it around. "Oh, and the Council's probably gonna send a secret agent to try to spy on us, by manipulating our memories to think he was part of the Guild all along."

"I see," Erza said, placing one hand on her chin, bowing her head in thought. She was probably going to say something goofy, that was how comedic timing working in this universe and she was Erza. "We will likely have to adjust how things go on from here. Do you think we should not do the trials on Tenrou Island?" Or maybe not.

"No, because then Grimoire Heart will probably kidnap the immortal kinda-evil wizard," Konata said.

"I see." She paused thoughtfully again. "In other words, we should simply respond to this by acting as we otherwise would, but preparing for Grimoire Heart's attack... what members of Grimoire Heart will be present? What do you know of their abilities?"

* * *

Cana stared at the stage, on which stood Erza Scarlet, Master Makarov, Mirajane Strauss, and her father. Gildarts. She looked down at her hands again, contemplating her position. She'd been forced to actually admit who she was to him. Was being an S-Class that important? He'd said all the normal cliche dad stuff about him being proud of her no matter what... but she still wanted to win.

"In the grand tradition of Fairy Tail," Master Makarov began. "I now present the list of wizards eligible to take the S-Class Wizard qualification test!" Everyone cheered, though Cana's was tinged with some note of melancholy. The normal reason she tried so hard was now... if not gone, then changed. "The location of the test shall be Tenrou Island! The sacred ground of our guild!" There was a pause. "The wizards eligible shall be - Natsu Dragneel! Gray Fullbuster! Juvia Lockser! Elfman! Cana Alberona!" She simply looked down again, wondering if she'd measure up this time... "Fried Justine! Levy McGarden! Lee! And Mest Gryder!"

"Oh," Konata said, sitting somewhere near Cana. She raised a hand, then paused, pulling it back down. "Huh. There was supposed to be an infiltrator, but those are all normal Fairy Tail guild members... maybe the Council changed their minds? I guess things are different."

"An infiltrator?" Cana asked.

"Oh, don't worry about that," Konata said, waving her hand dismissively. "Instead, worry about not betraying anybody in the guild to try to prove yourself to your dad! After all, it wouldn't prove you're cool to do so, right?"

Cana gave the girl a quiet glare. "Shut up," she said, then took a swig of beer to drown her irritation. "I wouldn't betray my guildmates anyway."

"Uh-huh, totally," Konata agreed, very insincerely.

"For your information, my father is Gildarts."

"Yeah, I know."

"Well, I told him that I'm his daughter, and he accepted me, so there!"

"Oh. Cool. Did Lee make you do it?"

Cana responded to that question by taking a very deep swig of beer so that she wouldn't have to talk.

"Initially, we had planned to allow only one to pass the qualification test..." Makarov said, making Cana's attention flick back to him. "We still plan to maintain a strong competitive element, but given the number of capable wizards ready to participate, as well as... other factors..." He looked at Erza pointedly. Had Erza lobbied for multiple winners because of Lee? That sounded more nepotistic than she'd have expected from Erza... "Participants in the competition will be evaluated on an objective metric. Still! Strive your hardest to win! There might indeed be just one victor!"

* * *

The whole of Fairy Tail erupted to life once Makarov finished his explanation - to the extent it had ever been quiet, at least. Wendy sat and watched as people jumped around, Natsu hooting with joy at having gotten in, Gray declaring that Natsu had no chance of victory because Gray was going to win, Juvia saying that she hoped her getting in didn't hurt Lee's chances... it was lively, just like always, and Wendy couldn't help but smile, seeing everybody so happy. The Fairy Tail Guild was really incredible, the energy just felt like an all-enveloping force, no matter what the current situation was.

"Wendy, hello," Lee said, making Wendy jerk a little in surprise. He'd seemed to come out of nowhere.

"Hi! Congrats on getting into the competition," Wendy said, smiling at him. She hadn't gotten in, but she was just twelve, so she wasn't too surprised about that.

"Thank you," Lee said, smiling down at Wendy, patting her on the head. She smiled at him, and then glanced around to see where Carla was - she really didn't like Lee, and she'd probably like him even less if he talked to Wendy when she wasn't around. "I was actually wondering if you would join me on my mission to Tenrou Island," he told her.

"Oh! You want me to be your partner?" They had mentioned that everybody would get a partner, but Wendy hadn't really expected to be asked to come along.

"Yes," Lee said, kneeling down in front of her so that he was at eye level with her. "Wendy Marvell. Sky Dragon Slayer. Please, join me on my mission. Help me overcome the other wizards, and achieve victory in these trials."

"Um..." Wendy hesitated. She was definitely flattered, but on the other hand... "I should ask Carla." Carla had always been looking out for her, after all.

"Of course, Wendy," Lee said, sitting down next to her. "I'll wait for her return."

It didn't take long - Carla was back within a minute or so, looking positively outraged to see Lee sitting next to Wendy. "The moment I look away for one second, you-!" She cut herself off, probably because she was going to say something dirty or adult. That was why adults cut themselves off like that, especially when they were angry.

"I was merely asking Wendy if she'd like to join me on this great adventure to come," Lee said.

"Adve- you mean the S-Class trials?! She is twelve!"

"She is also a Dragon Slayer, and capable beyond her years in matters of battle," Lee responded. "You cannot treat her like a mere babe, simply because she is short."

"You absolute brute!" Carla huffed. "Wendy, come on," she said, with a jerk of her head, and a come-along move of her hand.

"Well..." Wendy hesitated, looking up at Lee.

"If you do not wish to come, then do not. But don't worry - despite these trials being S-Class, they themselves will be quite safe for you. Even if something truly terrible should happen, by our powers combined, it should be impossible for anyone to be gravely injured. Indeed, that's why I want you along so badly," he said, reaching for her hand, clasping it, his expression one of total seriousness. (Probably. She couldn't see his eyes, given the sunglasses.) "With you there, Fairy Tail will most certainly be safe."

Wendy bit her lower lip. Lee was probably right. She looked at Carla. "Wendy! Wendy, I... it will most certainly be dangerous!" She looked unusually sure, making both Lee and her stare at the flying cat. Carla crossed her arms. "I've had a vision of those trials... I'm afraid they weren't clear, but I could tell that things go in a dire direction. They aren't safe."

"If it won't be safe... then it's even more important I go along with Lee!" Wendy declared, hopping to her feet. "Sorry, Carla, but Fairy Tail is my new home, and I'm going to help protect it!"

"Wendy, they are adults, you are a child, you don't have to protect them," Carla started, but Wendy fixed her with her own steely gaze. Carla knew what it meant - she wasn't going to be dissuaded! This was important! Carla's eyes slid over to Lee. "Come now, Lee. Surely even you don't think a twelve year old should go into the belly of the beast?"

Lee crossed his arms, seeming to contemplate what Carla said. "I think that the world doesn't care what age we are," he declared after a moment, making Carla groan. "I promise to protect Wendy with my life, Carla!"

"Oh, wonderful," Carla said, rolling her eyes. "I step away for one minute..." Carla muttered, before floating towards the pair, forcibly plopping herself down in between Wendy and Lee on the bench. "If you fail to protect Wendy, you will most certainly not live very long, Lee," she said, glowering up at Lee.

"I already promised that I would protect her with my life," Lee replied. "I could hardly live long, if I was dead from protecting her with my life." Wendy felt her cheeks glow a bit at that - Lee was so cool! Carla just got more annoyed at him, though, and started yelling at him, which he took calmly and in good spirits.

Konata was visiting the shop to buy some more comics. They did have some comics here in Earthland, even if - like far too many young people her age - she would never find out how One Piece ended. She guessed she would probably just stay here in Magnolia instead of going out to Tenrou Island. She'd have seven years to sponge off Lee's money if he did get trapped... admittedly, she'd miss out on seven years of sex with Lee. Big trade off. Hopefully he'd do better than canon and they'd all come back, then she'd get the seven years of sponging and the seven years of sex both.

Yep. If you thought about it, there was no reason for her to go along at all, she already told Erza what was gonna happen as best she could remember. This way, she wouldn't get killed by Zeref or something.

"Konata Izumi?" The voice was male, and she spun around to look at the person it belonged to. Guy, short spiky hair, scar on his eye. Right, Mest Gryder. One of the successful entrants to the S-Class trials. "I'm Mest."

"Yeah, I know," Konata said. "What's up?"

"I'm a disciple of Mystogan," he said, continuing on as if she hadn't said anything at all. "With your strength, I think I could become an S-Class Wizard."

"What?" Konata asked. She didn't remember this guy that well... he must have been a comedy relief character, whose main characteristic was being an idiot. "All I can do is be a sword."

"A sword is valuable," Mest said.

"Then buy one at the store." She exited the shop, entering into the snow falling softly on Magnolia. Mest followed after her, so she sighed and stopped - when she turned around, though, he was looking up at the sky, tongue stretched out. "Uh, what are you doing?"

"I want to know what snow tastes like!" He said.

She did sorta remember this part of canon. Didn't he originally ask Wendy out? Ugh... but Lee asked Wendy to come with him. This guy definitely didn't win, but she couldn't remember how well he did in a fight. "It tastes like crushed up ice," Konata said.

"Yes," he agreed, then turned back to her. "Please, Konata. Help me!"

Was he important to beating the Grimoire Heart villains? Probably. It was Fairy Tail, after all. Everybody was important and got a highlight period. She couldn't remember exactly how he helped, but... "Okay, I guess," she said, at last.

"Thank you," he said, smiling in relief. Then he turned to the river behind him, the main one that ran through Magnolia. "Hm..." He said, staring at it quietly for a second - then he simply leapt into it. "Ah! So this is how it feels, to be in a wintry river!"

She just stared at him. Only the strongest mages had such dumb personalities, right? Right. He was definitely important somehow. She just couldn't remember how...

* * *

As we began our journey to Tenrou Island, the sweltering heat of the long journey and boiling sun seemed to do their best to mark each and every one of us. I was unconcerned, however - I knew I had a distinct advantage over my rivals. After all, I never wore much anyway, so I didn't have to strip down to my underwear. Plus, of course, I had the ability to simply use my time manipulation powers to rewind my body to its condition when the sweltering sun first hit me, and therefore ignore its inconvenient rays.

Everyone else was sweating like pigs, if pigs actually could sweat (they cannot). It did give me an excellent opportunity to admire the bodies of my many beautiful guildmates. Lucy in a bikini... Cana in a bikini... Evergreen in a bikini... Levi in a light top and short skirt... Lisanna in a bikini... unfortunately, Mirajane and Erza were already on Tenrou Island, preparing for our arrival, so I did not get to see them in a bikini (at that point).

Juvia was also apparently unaffected by the heat, wearing her classic ushanka and fur cloak - but when she saw my eyes wandering, she immediately went to get changed, and soon emerged wearing the skimpiest bikini of them all. "Ah, my beloved Lee!" She said, hurriedly rushing towards me, glomming onto me. "Don't worry, Lee! Even if we're competing now, I won't do anything to harm you!"

"Thank you, Juvia," I told her, gently patting her head. She smiled brilliantly at that, even sparing a glance for Lucy that Lucy was far too hot to even notice. "I did not expect such a thing."

"Y-yes, of course, you knew I would be faithful, because I'm so faithful!" Juvia declared, half to herself, half to me. "I'm sorry for doubting your trust for even a single second, my beloved Lee!"

"There is no cause for concern. I understand - my own wandering eye is obvious, even behind these sunglasses," I said, nodding as if I was speaking some great wisdom, Juvia hanging on my every word. "What you need to remember, Juvia, is that while I appreciate outer beauty, what is truly important is inner beauty." Juvia blushed at that. "Which you have in spades."

"You're so full of crap," Konata said, where she was slumped over a table, wearing a bikini herself, but filling it out much less than any of the Fairy Tail girls had.

"How dare you say that about my beloved Lee! And also me, arguably, depending on what you meant to imply! Lee, you can see how awful this girl is, can't you?!"

"He's having sex with Sorano and Ikaruga. They were literally supervillains before he started fucking them."

"That is true," I admitted, "but I believe we all know that my heart beats far more strongly for women with beautiful spirits, like Juvia and Erza, than it does for Ikaruga."

"That's true, Lee!" Juvia agreed instantly. "After all, Ikaruga is merely your masturbation maid, while I'm your future wife!" I think pretty much everybody stared at Juvia at her words, and she hurriedly squished herself against my arm, pushing her breasts against my biceps. "A-ah, I, just, am saying that in the future, I'll be married to my beloved Lee, of course, and we'll have lots and lots of babies together!" She looked at everybody like they were a pack of ferocious sharks ready to eat her up.

"I don't think that's why they're staring at you," Konata said from the position she was lazing at.

"Oh? Well if you are so smart then you explain it! They're obviously just jealous that my beloved Lee is going to marry me!"

"Seriously, man?" Gajeel asked - he was still Levi's partner in this timeline, and he didn't even spare Juvia a glance to try to explain to her what the actual problem.

"My sex life is none of any of your business," I said, raising my chin a few degrees defensively.

"Yes! All the hot steamy sex my beloved Lee has with me is just between me and him!" Juvia declared, which most certainly did not help the situation any.

Fortunately, at that point, the conversation was interrupted by Master Makarov stepping out onto the bridge. "Tenrou Island!" He declared, pointing into the distance, where, indeed, Tenrou Island rested. "They say that fairies once rested here, on this very island... and that this is the final resting place of Mavis Vermillion, the first Guild Master!"

"Oh yeah," Konata said. "Bring her back from the dead too."

"What the hell kind of clothes are you wearing?" Gray demanded, standing up - he was completely naked, while Master Makarov was wearing a Hawaiian shirt and swim trunks.

"It's hot?" Makarov asked, more confused than anything else. "The first test!" He declared, snapping his fingers loudly to attract our attention. "You see where smoke rises from the shoreline?" He demanded, pointing into the distance. Honestly, I didn't, but I was wearing sunglasses so those probably weren't helping. "There are nine paths there - one for each pair. The paths will proceed as follows: one will take you to fight against myself! One will take you to fight against Gildarts! One against Erza! One against Mirajane Strauss! Four will take you to fight against one of the other teams, in a one-on-one duel, with the loser being eliminated right at the start! The last - the last, is completely peaceful!"

"There are a lot of tough battles on that list," Fried said. "Fighting an S-Class Wizard is a high call for people who aren't themselves at that rank."

"Yes," Makarov agreed. "It is ultimately up to the wizard you fight against, how hard they will take it on you," he explained. "But in the end, you will have the numbers advantage - two against one isn't enough for you? If you're too weak even for that, then you are surely not ready to become an S-Class Wizard!"

"What about the completely peaceful path?" Lucy asked.

"It's completely peaceful! No fights! Just walking through, nice and easy! The aim of the first test is to assess your fighting power - and your luck! If you luck into the peaceful path, that just shows your luck!"

"That... is ridiculous," Konata said. "That's not how luck works."

"It is how luck works, little miss!" Makarov said, crossing his arms.

"I'll just luck into the lucky route," Konata said, lazily.

"Yes, well, good luck!" Makarov said. "The race begins now!"

"We're still out at sea," Gray said.

"And?" Makarov asked, grinning from ear to ear.

At that point, Happy and Natsu attempted to leap off the ship, and were promptly stopped by Fried's force field, ramming full speed into it without the slightest awareness of what was about to happen before they hit. "Oof! What the heck is this?" Natsu kicked at the air.

"Fried's force field," Konata said lazily.

"Relax!" Fried said, even as he took off, flying right through the force field. "It'll come down after I get a five minute head start."

I just stepped forward towards the edge of the ship, rewinding time to before the force field had been put up. It took about half a minute for the force field to completely vanish, at which point everybody took off. Gray zoomed off on ice skates, accompanied by Loke; Natsu flew off, carried by Happy; Elfman and Evergreen dove off; Levy and Gajeel too. Juvia and Lisanna, Cana and Lucy, delayed for a moment, glancing over the edge of the vessel.

"H-huh," Cana said, taking a deep breath. "That's a big dive... and a long swim."

"I don't think we're going to be able to catch up with any of those guys," Lucy agreed.

"I could most certainly swim that entire way, but my beloved Lee, will you be okay?" Juvia demanded, revealing the reason she was waiting to jump into the water.

"Don't worry, Juvia," I told her, gently patting her head again. "I'll follow after you. Besides, since there are nine doors, but no clarity on which is which, it doesn't really matter what order we go in."

"You really think that?" Lucy asked, seeming dubious.

"Of course he thinks that! Why would my beloved Lee say something he doesn't believe! I'll see you soon, Lee!" Juvia shouted, kissing me on the cheek before leaping boldly into the water and starting to swim towards the island with desperate speed, leaving behind a sharp flutter of water like a motorboat zipping forward. It took Lisanna a second to realize she ought to be following after her, adopting the form of a mermaid to zip forward.

"So what's your plan, Lee?" Lucy asked, crossing her arms.

"Ah, that's simple," I said, pushing up my glasses. "I simply follow Makarov," I explained, turning my gaze up to where Makarov had been standing up on the top deck - only to find him missing. "What? When did he leave, Konata?" I asked, looking for Konata, who was also gone, along with her partner, Mest.

"Um... Mr. Lee..." Wendy said, sounding a lot less sure of her decision to partner with me. "Is that... the whole plan?"

"Hahaha. Of course not," I said, feeling rather less sure than I pretended. "Here, clamber aboard! I'll swim us across at superspeed!" I directed Wendy up onto my shoulders - and then leapt into the water, my legs kicking like crazy, but not getting us very far at all. Fortunately, it was times like these that a man had infinite mana and time manipulation powers for! I used them to accelerate my movement forward - only for my lungs to burn and my legs to ache as I teleported maybe one tenth of the way to my destination.

I probably should have practiced my swimming before this moment. "Mr. Lee? Are you okay?" Wendy looked down at me unsure. I was breathing heavily underneath her.

"Haha, I am fine," I told her, patting her thigh. "Give me a stamina top up."

"Yes!" Wendy declared, pressing her hand down against the top of my head and concentrating, a warm glow encompassing me. My lungs no longer burned or ached, and I jolted forward... another tenth of the way.

* * *

Lucy could only groan as she watched Lee's staccato movement through the water. "I guess he's going to get there before us too."

"Can one of your Celestial Keys help?" Cana asked.

"I could try calling Aquarius," Lucy admitted. "But..." There were two reasons she didn't want to do that. One, Aquarius generally got mad whenever she got summoned. Two, women generally fell in love with Lee whenever they saw him. That was two great reasons not to summon her. "I don't really think that's a good idea."

Cana sighed. "Well then - we'll just have to swim the old fashioned way. Good thing we're both in shape, right?" Cana asked, before just diving into the water, starting to swim quickly.

"Yeah," Lucy agreed, somewhat less honestly and less sure of herself than Cana had been.