Chapter 7

After what had probably been the most awkward lunch ever Willow made her way back to her room. She had made the decision to avoid her brother at all costs for the rest of the day and just stay in her room reading or something like that. The moment her eyes landed on the book on her bedside table though, another thought sneaked it's way back into her head. The attic.

Going up there would be way more exciting than just reading and she surely wouldn't meet her brother there. So only moments after she entered her room she left it again her mind set on finding some hidden treasured up in the attic. She quietly closed the door to the stairs that lead to the attic behind her and slowly made her way upstairs.

The air seemed to get cooler with every step she took and small goosebumps appeared all over her uncovered arms. A shiver of excitement ran down her spine, as she imagined all the things she might end up finding up there. It was quite dark, since there were only a few small windows and Willow didn't think of bringing a lamp with her.

She didn't mind the slightly spooky darkness though. Quite the opposite. She found it to be quite thrilling and mood-fitting.

There were definitely a lot of things to discover in the attic. It was stuffed with all kinds of things. Old furniture, boxes of all kinds and sizes and many more things. Carefully Willow made her way through the dimly lit room, trying very hard not to throw things over with her hooped skirt.

A little undecided on where to start, she just ended up grabbing the box closest to her and sitting herself down on an old armchair. She placed the box on her lap and opened the lid slowly, half expecting something to jump out at her. Of course that didn't happen though and instead she was met with some old photographs.

There were some of her father and some of his friends, the photos obviously being taken years ago, when her mother was still alive. There were a few photos of what Willow assumed to be Philip as a baby and there were a lot of photos from a young woman. It had to be her mother. It was weird to look at those pictures of her mother now. She did look a lot like her.

Willow felt a wave of sadness hit her, as she was thinking about her mother. She so wished that she could have met her. There had been so many moments in her life when she had wished for her mother to be there. So many times where she had felt so alone and lost without a mother figure in her life. And to see her there on those photos now... To Willow her mother had always felt like a ghost. She never felt real to her. But these photos were proof. Proof that she had lived in this house and proof that she did exist. And that gave her a strange feeling of comfort.

Looking at the photo in her hand, Willow understood why it had pained her father so much, to look at her. In that photograph her mother was seated on a bench in the garden, a book in her hand, happily smiling at the camera. If Willow wouldn't have known better, she could have thought it had been herself in that photograph. She really looked just like her mother. The same smile, their hair flowing the same way and they both had a similar petite figure.

Willow was eager to find out more about her mother now. What had she been like? What else were they sharing, except for their looks and their first name? Obviously her mother had enjoyed reading as well, which led Willow to think that she must have been an intelligent woman. Oh, how she would have loved to discuss her favorite books with her mother! They could have strolled through the gardens in the warm afternoon sun talking about their favorite characters.

Quickly Willow put the photo back into the box, put the lid back on and placed the box beneath her feet. What else was her mother interested in? Had she been as adventurous as Willow was? Making her way through the attic, Willow found a pile of drawings on paper atop of an old drawer. Cautiously she picked up the one on top. It was a drawing of their house from the view of the garden and it looked absolutely stunning. At the bottom right corner, the paper was signed with Antonia. Her mother must have drawn that. Had she been an artist? She surely had had a talent for it.

A warm feeling spread through Willow, as she found out more and more little details about her mother. Things that neither her father nor her brother would ever have mentioned to her. They had always kept quiet about her mother and Willow had never understood why. She had always been curious about her mother but it never occurred to her, that she could just go and find out more about her herself, if no one were to tell her anything about her.

Right now Willow felt closer to her mother than ever before. Maybe she had stood at this very spot years ago as well. She wondered how her mother had seen the world. She wondered how she had felt, strolling through the gardens, walking through the hallways of this house, sitting in the dining room eating with her family. Oh how Willow wished she could have had that too.

Willow set back down on the old armchair, suddenly overwhelmed with all those emotions washing over her all at once. It was impossible to put into words how much she missed her mother in this moment. What would she have said at that very moment? Would she have scolded Philip for treating her the way he did? Would she encourage Willow to stand up for herself? Or would she just ask both of them to behave themselves and get along?

Blinking away a few tears that had welled up in her eyes, Willow looked around the attic. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that she never got to meet her mother. She wished that her father and her brother had dealt differently with the loss of her. She wished that instead of shutting Willow out and making her feel like it was her fault that her mother died, they would have remembered the good times they had spent with her. And she wished that they would have shared those stories with her. But they hardly lost a single word about her.

Willow wondered if any other things of her mothers were up here in the attic. What things did she leave behind? Getting up from her place in the armchair once again, Willow strolled over to a shelf full of books and couldn't help but wonder, if her mother had read those books. Which of those could have been her favorite? She let her fingertips run over the backs of the books softly, closing her eyes for a moment. Trying to imagine her mother doing just that while deciding on what book to read next.

Her hand stopped and Willow opened her eyes once again. She took the book that her fingers landed on out the shelf and had a closer look at it. Unfortunately the cover wasn't in the best condition and in the dim light Willow couldn't make out the title. She decided to take the book downstairs with her though. Once she had finished reading the book she started the other day, she'd read this one. Just the thought that her mother may have read that book all those years back made her like the book already.

Talking about books. Willow was ecstatic that she found a whole shelf full of them up here. That meant that she could just come up here to get new books to read and didn't have to ask her brother to bring her one, since she was now forbidden from stepping foot into the study. She still couldn't believe that he just forbad her from entering the room at all. Just because she happened to interrupt him talking to Charles. At least Willow thought it had been Charles. He was one of the only friends of her brothers that she had actually seen before. However she didn't pay too much attention to the visitor in the study today as she clearly had other things on her mind.

Willow was sorry for interrupting their talk, but she had no bad intentions. Her brother however didn't seem to realize that. To him she was just another problem he had to take care of. She was just a burden to him. Well from now on, he shouldn't feel like she was a burden anymore, because he would hardly see her anymore. Of course they'd see each other when they were having their meals, but other than that Willow would make sure to stay out of his way. She was sick and tired of fighting with him all the time and of being yelled at.

Her brother had to make an effort now, if he wanted to fix their relationship, because Willow was done, dealing with his mood swings and his temper.

Surely spending more time apart from each other was, what was best for both of them. At least there would be no more fighting. And if that was going to be the only positive thing that would come from them not spending time with each other anymore, Willow would gladly accept it.

Talking about spending time away from Philip, Willow thought. She would make sure to spend some time extra far away from him. But therefore she needed to find some mens clothing. There had to be some up here right?

Willow remembered Thomas and Elise cleaning out their fathers room and redecorating it to be another guest room. Surely they wouldn't just throw all of her father's things away. So naturally they would end up up here. In the attic. She just had to find them.

A new spirit had been awoken within Willow. She was now on the hunt for a treasure. Yes, a treasure. It might have just been some old clothes from her father to anyone else, but to her it would be a treasure. Because those clothes ment freedom. And that was the one thing that Willow desired most in life. Freedom. Other girls her age might have been longing for their prince charming to come riding on a horse and to ride into the sunset with them, but Willow couldn't care less about things like that. She wanted to ride that horse herself and not into the sunset, but to foreign countries.

After looking through pretty much every box in the attic Willow was still left without her treasure though. And the excitement was slowly starting to fade. But she just knew that those clothes were somewhere up here.

Now making her way over to a dresser in the very back of the room Willow silently prayed that she would finally find her treasure in there. She opened the first drawer and was pleasantly surprised when she saw fabric. Yes, yes, YES! Willow pulled on the fabric. And pulled.... and pulled... And had to discover that it was an old dress. That could have belonged to her mother once. She couldn't help but wonder how that dress had looked on her mother, how the soft fabric felt on her skin. Maybe she should take it downstairs with her and try it on? Carefully she put the dress aside and roamed through the other drawers. But they were just full with womens clothing. Not a single pair of trousers or a shirt in sight.

This was impossible. Her father's clothing had to be up here too. Willow knew that. She had already found her mother's clothing. Of course her father's clothing would be up here too. Turning around her eyes scanned the room for something that looked like it had only recently been placed up here. Something that had been opened not too long ago. Something that was big enough to contain clothing. Something like a wardrobe or maybe a chest or a coffer. And finally her eyes landed on a large wooden chest right next to the stairs.

As quickly as possible Willow made her way over there, taking her mother's dress with her. She would definitely take that down to her room with her and try it on. The young duchess put the dress on the armchair next to the book she had picked out previously and kneeled down in front of the wooden chest.

The lid was heavier than expected and Willow had a hard time lifting it up. But what her eyes were met with, was worth every effort. It was her father's clothing. If Willow could have, she would have taken the whole chest down with her, but she knew that she had to limit herself to the very basics. She only had two arms and the more she took from the attic the harder it would be to hide those things away in her room so neither Elise nor her brother would find them.

Willow hurried to find everything she needed and tried to also choose pieces that went together somewhat well. She also made sure to pick the smallest clothes. Her father had been much taller and also a little on the chubby side in his last years, so Willow had to dig deep to find some of the clothes he must have worn when he had been around Philips age. It was already getting dark outside and with that it was also getting dark inside the attic. Dark and cold.

Quickly Willow pulled all the things she wanted to take together and made her way back down the stairs. This was easier said than done. Her hands full with clothing and the book, her hooped skirt prevented her from seeing the steps below her at all and by now it was pretty much pitch black in the attic. Finally she had reached the end of the stairs.

As quietly as anyhow possible she opened the door ever so slightly and peaked into the hallway. The lamps had been lid and provided enough light for Willow to be certain, that there was no one there. Quickly she opened the door all the way and pushed it shut with her behind. It only took her a few quick steps and she was safely back in her room.

The clothes were quickly put away into the very back of her dresser, her mother's dress neatly placed on top of her father's clothing. If Elise were to see the new clothes, Willow could always say that she got one of her mother's dresses from the attic, because she had wanted to try it on, but didn't want her brother to know, since she didn't want him to get sad about their mother's loss. Elise would understand and surely not tell Philip about it.

Willow sat down on her bed to inspect the book that she had taken from the attic further. She had just taken it from her nightstand, when the door to her room burst open. Willow jumped at the sudden loud noise and was met with her fuming brother not even a second later. Whatever had she done this time?

"Where the hell were you?" Philip demanded to know, yelling at his little sister the second time this day. "Dinner was ready an hour ago and you were nowhere to be found!" He was beyond mad at her for just disappearing without a word.

"I was up in the attic." Willow explained in her usual calm and soft voice, but inside she was freaking out. How could she lose track of time like that and let him notice her absence? She was so stupid! Okay, everything was fine. She could do this.

"Whatever would you do up there?" her brother continued his interrogation, not yelling anymore, but still in a louder voice than necessary.

"I was just looking for books." his sister answered, holding up the book in her hand, to prove that she was telling the truth.

Philip glanced at the book, then back at his sister. She assumed that he thought she had run off or done something forbidden, as he seemed a little taken aback by her smooth explanation. Willow fought back the victorious smile that wanted to spread on her lips for winning this fight.

"Next time make sure to be downstairs in time for dinner. I don't have time for things like that." Philip declared grumpily, turned around and left the room without another word. Willow let the smile spread on her face. That was close, way too close for her liking, but she was also proud of herself for handling the situation so calmly. Just imagine her brother would have come in here a few minutes earlier, when she hadn't finished hiding the clothes. The little bit of freedom that she had worked so hard towards would have been gone in the blink of an eye.

Willow let herself fall backwards on the bed so she was now laying across it with her legs dangling off the edge. Now that she had her father's clothes here, she felt like she was free. Free to leave the Cornwall grounds, whenever she pleased. Well, not really whenever. She could really only leave at night to be sure that she wouldn't get caught. But just the possibility of leaving made her happier than she had been in a very, very long time.

And she knew where her first nightly trip would take her to. The small lake in the woods. Willow hoped that she would manage to find it. Surely it wouldn't be too easy. Especially at night time. But it really couldn't be too far away from their grounds. So even if she had to do a bit of searching she would most definitely find it eventually. It was still hard to believe for Willow, that she really had the freedom to leave now. Wasn't it crazy that just a few pieces of clothing could bring so much freedom and so much happiness?

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