Chapter 12: Heavenly Revelations...

Alex looked up, completely bewildered, and saw an angelic blonde standing in front of him. She wore a white dress, equal parts innocence and whimsy. Sunlight broke through the overcast skies to shine down on the exact spot where she was standing, illuminating her beauty and her smile.

"Rachel?" Alex blinked in surprise.

Her face was a heart achingly lovely picture of warmth, and kindness, and all that was good... right up until it twisted in a disgusted scowl. "Oh good Lord," she burst out loudly, "you stink of that cheap, nasty slut!"

Passersby turned their heads. Alex just stood there, mouth agape. "What kinda moron cheats on a babe like her?" someone muttered.

"...Hello, Rachel," Alex managed once he got hold of his wits again. "How are you?"

"I was fine until I was overwhelmed by the stench of whore-vagina."

Alex became aware of the dozens of eyes on them and the mumblings of "jackass," "loser," and, "I never understand why hotties hook up with such douchebags." He glanced around, then offered her his hand. "I've been really hoping to see you again. Can we go somewhere and talk?"

Rachel looked at the hand like he'd just pulled it out of a toilet. "Go," she waved, "I'll walk with you, just... go."

They wandered a moment until they found a tree to sit under. Alex shook his head, amazed at the way he reacted to her. He felt an instant emotional connection, one that was just as quickly thrown into chaos as it was formed. Just looking at her made him long for her approval, her companionship, intimacy... and here she was, making an obvious point of sitting upwind of him.

"I was so proud of you yesterday." The disappointment in her voice was palpable. "I mean, even after all that had just happened, you got up and went to work, and I thought everything was well, but... look at you. I'll bet every moment you've been home alone with her you've been putting your..." she waved her hand as if fighting for the right word, "thing, penis, into her, haven't you?"

He bit his tongue. "I'm glad to see that you're okay," Alex said, hoping to shift the subject for just a moment. "I really wanted to talk to you more before you left."

"Sure you did," Rachel frowned.

"Hey, I held out until last night!" Alex finally shot back. "She's been wrapping people around her finger for like two thousand plus years. I'm a single nineteen-year-old guy. What did you think was gonna happen when you sent me home with her?"

The angel inhaled sharply and looked away as if he'd slapped her. "I'm sorry," Alex found himself pleading, "I'm so sorry. I don't want to yell at you. It's just... yes, I slept with her, alright?" He bowed his head. "I slept with her, and before I did I was really freaked out over what might happen. But now I don't know why I should even feel bad about it except that... except that it makes you unhappy. And it's not even like I really know you or owe you anything," he mumbled.

Silence fell between the two for a moment. They both looked down at the ground awkwardly. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised," Rachel finally conceded with a small voice. "I suppose it doesn't do any real harm... even if you're probably bound to do it again," she ventured sullenly.

Alex's eyes widened a bit as he shrugged in admission, to which Rachel just turned her head, nodded, and continued another long and uncomfortable moment of silence.

"She said it's not like heaven looks down on sex if that's all it is," Alex muttered. "And you both told me the bond means she can't lie to me."

"It doesn't. Not really. Not if you aren't hurting people or, well, betraying someone."

"Do you feel betrayed?" Alex asked. Her breath caught, and he looked at her with curiosity mixing into his reflexive feelings of contrition. Then his brow furrowed. The ritual was weaker on her, he knew, but maybe it wasn't entirely ineffective. Either way, she was an angel. Lying probably wasn't in Rachel's skill set. Maybe being so direct was a little harsh on her. "Does that question make you uncomfortable?"

"Yes," she nodded. "This whole issue makes me uncomfortable."

"You don't have to answer that. I'm sorry I asked. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. Whatever's going on between Lorelei and I is just -- weird. I think it'll always be weird. But I've told her and I'll tell you that I don't want to hurt anybody. We're just trying to get along when everything between us is bound to be weird."

"You haven't hurt anybody," Rachel almost whispered. "I guess what goes on between you and... her is just between you and her."

"I'm really glad to see you, Rachel," Alex gently tried again.

She nodded. "It's good to see you," came her hesitant response.

"Did you say you saw me go to work yesterday?"

"Yes."

"And you've found me here. But you didn't know about Lorelei and I until just now. Have you been watching me somehow?"

Rachel nodded, her brow furrowed. "I can see you much of the time, but not when you're with... her." There was less venom in her voice, but the topic was still tender. "I suspect it has something to do with the ritual and the bond interacting with our rather polarized natures."

"Are you still weakened by the ritual, too?"

Again, she nodded. "My strength returns slowly. The Hosts have said something about needing to balance the evils done to me with acts of good."

"Is that the other angels? I thought they were supposed to help you break free of the ritual?"

"Freeing me might also free her, which would create complications," Rachel shrugged. "I'm not sure if they even know how to do that, though. When I spoke with my peers there was a distance to it. No harmony, no concord."

"You said you were diminished. Wouldn't that be part of the spell?"

She shook her head. "No. I felt like they were standoffish somehow. Like they were cutting me out. I feel as if they don't know what to do and are afraid to admit it." There was a hint of bitterness and hurt in her voice. Alex reached out to hold her hand, and this time she allowed it.

"I'm sorry," he said. Then, hoping a change of subjects might lighten the mood, he asked, "So you've been watching me?"

"Yes. I have been appointed your new guardian angel, for whatever I'm worth as such."

"Wow. That's nice. Most people don't get to meet theirs." As he watched her face, he grew a touch suspicious. "Does everyone have one?"

"More or less, yes. It's not a one-to-one ratio, though, and protection can be lost."

"But you're my new one? Who was my guardian angel before?"

"His name is Sean. He's... kind of a pussy. He quit."

"He quit?!"

"Abandoned his post. Chickened out. Buggered off."

"When did that happen?"

Rachel struck the ground and looked up into Alex's eyes, forcing herself to keep her voice even despite her open bitterness. "Right when he followed you into that chapel and saw a fellow angel bound, tortured, and facing rape and enslavement."

"Oh my God," Alex breathed.

"Yup."

"I'm so sorry."

"For what? You saved me so don't be sorry unless you regret it." It seemed to be the first positively note she had struck since she first said hello to him. "I owe you my life."

"I don't regret it at all. So you volunteered to be my guardian angel?" he smiled.

"No. I wanted to, but I'm not exactly at my best. I wanted you to have someone who was stronger. I argued for that, even. The Hosts decided that I was the most appropriate choice despite my weaknesses."

"I'm flattered."

"I wish you had received someone better."

"I want you."

Rachel's eyes flashed at that, and she gasped just a little, but held it short. "Um," she stammered, "you said that you, ah, wanted to talk to me?"

Is she blushing? Alex thought in amazement. He hadn't said anything flirtatious, he thought. Didn't really mean anything by it. This conversation had gone from him not knowing how to handle her disgust to the both of them now gripped with sudden shyness.

"Two things, really. The first -- those guys who abducted you. I know they're dead, but do you know if you're at risk of that happening again? Are there others? Lorelei didn't really talk much about it. She just kind of warned me that I might have to face that sort of danger again."

"She's not wrong about that," Rachel conceded. "But no, I don't know about those men. This was as much a shock to me as it was to her. I have asked the Hosts. They didn't have much to tell me. Probably because they don't know anything themselves."

"So, what, angels just go missing and nobody goes looking for them?"

She responded with a troubled look before she spoke. "I am learning to see my peers in something of a new light through all of this," she confessed, carefully choosing each word. "It may simply be that my faith is being tested. I don't know. At any rate, it is difficult for those on my side of things to get answers out of men who've already been sent straight to Hell. I may have been a bit hasty in destroying them and that chapel."

"You had been through an awful lot. I don't think anyone could blame you. Still, I think it would be good to look for answers to this."

"You have to be careful, Alex. I would certainly advise you to keep a low profile. Others in your position might not think twice before... before playing rashly with their apparent fortunes."

"That brings up the other thing I wanted to ask you about," Alex said. "I'm not really sure how I can ask this. I'm not... I'm not a pig who doesn't respect women or something..."

Rachel squeezed his hand and gave a little smile. "It's okay. You can trust me. You'll have me watching you a lot from now on. Creepy, I know," she jested.

"All the time?"

"No, not all the time. Certainly not when you're with... her. And I imagine that might be much of the time. But not constantly, regardless. I will be watching frequently enough that I should know what goes on in your life."

"...and I'll get to see you in person again, right?"

She smiled, again somewhat shyly. "Yes. Sometimes."

"I would really like that."

"You were going to ask me something obviously very awkward and potentially explosive," she observed.

He blinked. "I'm. Wow. Uh, I'm... apparently becoming irresistible to women whom I find attractive." Rachel snorted out a laugh, and covered her mouth with her hand, and Alex continued sheepishly but quickly so as to get it all out. "Lorelei keeps telling me I can and should sleep with whoever I want to and obviously I'm very tempted to take her up on that as long as I'm not hurting anybody but I don't want to wind up in Hell. And I don't want to make you mad," he added without even thinking about it.

Rachel snorted again, and then laughed openly at him. "You worry a lot, don't you?"

"I'm serious! I think I might go insane."

"Who says you're not already insane?" the blonde giggled. "You're going around having conversations and sexual congress with beings not of this world."

"Okay, don't fuck with me like that, am I going nuts?"

"No," she giggled more. "No, you're not crazy." Eventually, Rachel composed herself. "You haven't done anything wrong so far."

"You totally blew up at me not ten minutes ago!"

"That's... that's different," she said, waving a dismissive hand. "I mean I'm not entirely happy you're fooling around with that hussy, but I... understand?" Alex waited while she searched for words. "You have a good heart. You're a good person with good instincts. And what she has said to you isn't a lie. I don't think you're going to hurt anyone, Alex. You've established your boundaries with her, right?"

"I think so. I keep thinking so. Maybe I need to be a little more explicit."

Rachel nodded emphatically. "You're the master in this relationship, Alex. I know you want to be nice, but even diminished and bound as she is, she could be dangerous. But she's in your power and it's not like that's alien to her, and things are going to be that way for a long, long time, so don't let her run you around. If you think something's really wrong, it probably is."

"You can't just give me an actual no-go list? I've already gotten the impression from all this that I can't exactly take the Bible or religious figures literally."

Her mouth opened, then promptly closed. "I cannot speak on that."

"Of course not," Alex nodded with a shrug.

The angel's eyes turned apologetic, and she squeezed his hand again. "I'm not mad if you're having sex, Alex," she said finally. "Not if it's a little or a lot. You've got good instincts, and like you said, you don't want to hurt anyone. If you start going down the wrong path, I'll know sooner or later, and you and I don't have the usual guardian angel relationship. I'll show up and tell you."

"You'll come kick me in the balls?"

"I can't hurt you."

"What if I tell you to?"

"Maybe. I don't know. We'll cross that bridge if we ever get to it, but I think I can trust you."

They shared a long, quiet look at one another. "I'd really like to see more of you, Rachel," Alex said softly.

She merely shrugged. "Time will tell. But you have other classes to get to."

Alex nodded, and stood. Before he left, he asked, "Was there something else you wanted to talk about?"

"I just wanted to see you," Rachel smiled softly. She stepped close to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Be happy. Be good."