I Belong to Myself

Pov.Asteria

I stayed there staring at the ceiling until I could see the dawn reflecting in the walls of my room. My brain was going hardwire, planning mines and Emily's escape. Where would we go after we escape?

What if we get caught? Honestly, I don't care what happens with me, but Emily.

I got up to have the first decent breakfast in two days. I was only allowed to eat every two days to keep my "figure." I started doing my makeup putting closer attention to each detail. I decided to go bold today and wear red lipstick. As for my hair was curled up in a bun with a ribbon in it.

To match my lips I wore a red long dress with black heels. I stared at myself in the mirror expecting something to happen but it didn't. I walked towards my potions and grabbed the one, that not once in my life I thought would touch.

I grabbed the white potion and drank it in a gulp.

White, ironic, it represent purity, something that I now longed for.

Holding the cold glass in my hand angered me. This should have not happened to me or anyone for that matter. Suddenly I heard something explode. It was all the potions glasses including the one in my hand.

Focus Asteria don't do anything, hold your anger for a few more days.

My "parents" think I need a guy to protect me and fight my battles. They are so wrong and I'll prove to them that. They wanted a perfect and quiet princess. I'll give it to them by the end of this week.

Don't they know I can be dangerous as well? Have I depended on them for too long?

I will show them I can handle every situation that crosses my path and I don't need rescuing. They like to call me a princess because they love to keep me helpless. But that isn't what I want. When I come back I am going to show them how to treat me like a queen. And after they see what I have become I will destroy them.

I will make everyone bow and beg for mercy. They always had me on this fake pedestal but I will turn it into gold. I don't care, but everyone will succumb under my power. I will not care about the lives I'll have to take.

I have always been the biggest prize and painted this picture of me as the biggest angel. From now on I'll belong to myself only and I'll be the opposite of an angel. I just got to stay in control.

I took a deep breath and out before I snapped. I knocked on my room doors and they opened. I walked carefully toward the dining table and sat there waiting for everyone to come. I looked down at the silverware there were so many shiny knives. I grabbed the smallest but sharpest one and put it inside my bra. I grabbed the one that was the closest to it and started playing with it.

I let the knife drop as the doors of the dining room opened once again. I didn't turn to see who it was just staying there contemplating the pure silverware. Pure. I wasn't pure anymore.

Don't move and stay there looking pretty, says my "mother." I heard someone clear their throat but I didn't flinch or turned my head.

"Yes?" I said not interested at all in who was the person trying to get my attention but my attention was still on the silverware.

"Asteria," both my parents said at the same time. I nodded in order for them to continue.

"Speak when you're spoken to," said my mother in a low tone not wanting the help to hear.

"Yes, mother," I said, almost spitting the word mother. "What is it that you wish?" I said this time looking at her straight in the eyes. I don't know what she saw but she took a step back.

She cleared her throat and moved to her seat on the other side of the "father". I cautiously followed each of her movements. "Father" was already sitting and I sat on the right side of the middle. I wanted to laugh because this table seemed to represent our distance and each passing second seemed to grow.

"Asteria you know what you're supposed to do no matter who comes through a door, especially if we are the one walking through them." I sat quietly for a second deciding if I should apologize or tell her to fuck off. I went for the easy way.

"I'm sorry," I said and those words almost made me suffocate in restraint.

"Let's eat," announced my father.

"Won't the Fenix be joining us?" I asked hoping the answer is no.

"No, Why?" said my father as the servants served our food.

"Oh, nothing, I just had such a great time with Prince William yesterday," I said with restraint and sarcasm in my voice almost throwing up as the memory overwhelmed me. I stabbed a strawberry with my fork then shoved it in my mouth.

The food looked delicious but surprisingly I didn't want to eat it. I breathed it and snapped my head toward the help that was waiting for any instructions from our part.

I motioned my hand in order for one of them to take the food away.

"Please make sure to tell that chef to make something more appetizing next time, yes?"

My parents and help stared at me in surprise. I had never snapped to any of them or raised my voice. I always ate the food in eagerness.

"What?" I screamed and my voice boomed around the big dining room. I quickly wiped my mouth and got out of my chair almost knocking it over. Not bother to ask permission to leave at my parent's gaping mouths I left. The little innocent girl was gone. From now on the only person, I would respect or even have trust would be Emily.