Chapter 6: Dying Inside

Levi

Why am I doing this?

It still early in the afternoon so the weather hasn’t changed much. Despite it still being winter, the sun was out with a touch of chilly wind. I shift in my driver’s seat for the 17th time as I stare ahead, slowing down when we hit a red light.

Rosalie sat silently at the passenger’s seat. I tried giving out a few comments about..anything really, to engage in conversation but failed when she’d either give one-word answers or just no reply at all. I decided to just keep my mouth shut and just drive.

I could still remember asking her to come with me as if it were just an hour ago.

You know, because it was.

We had exchanged numbers and after a lot of persistence (not really), she’ll come over and I’ll drive. She offered for me to ride with her on her bike but I’m a coward so I declined. I was planning on keeping silent the whole ride there but then she changed the song on the radio.

Smack a bitch by Rico Nasty started playing.

“Um...no.” I frowned. “Change it back.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Why? I like this song.”

I sighed and using my left hand, pressed a button, and Brooklyn Baby by Lana Del Ray began playing. I threw her a glance and suppressed a smile when I saw her roll her eyes. I figured it’s time to bring the thing that’s been eating at me the moment I opened the passenger door for her to get in.

Sparing her another glance I decide to just go for it. “I’m surprised you agreed to come.”

Her eyes flash away from the window, giving me their full attention. “I’m surprised you asked me to.”

What’s that supposed to mean?

“Well...you didn’t have to say yes.” What am I saying, I sound as if I don’t want her to be here.

She stayed silent. She seems to be really good at doing that. “Why did you come?” This is so awkward.

This time she casts her eyes downwards as she chipped at her black nail polish. “It gets tiring being alone some of the time. Evan doesn’t say it out loud but I know he thinks I should get out more and hang out with people other than him sometimes," she suddenly cleared her throat. "But mostly because I was bored.”

I nodded. “Sounds fair. But don’t you have a sister?”

She blinked. “Yes? What about her?”

“Aren’t you guys close?” I’m pushing my boundaries.

She shrugged absentmindedly. “I’m not sure.” I have no idea what she meant but that was the end of that.

With one hand on the wheel, I used the other to run it through my hair, choosing to ignore the way she eyed me. “If people find out about this it’s gonna be all over News Whisperer right?” it sounds ridiculous but it’s true.

She leaned her head back, exposing her black chokers which made me quickly look back at the road which I should have been paying attention to from the beginning. “I know,” she says.

“And…”

“I don’t care.”

“You never seem to do.” about anything.

“What?”

“Nothing,” I said quickly.

It’s true though.

The caring thing.

She groaned and placed her feet on the dashboard. I scowled at her and smacked her boots. “Get your feet off the dashboard.” I noticed the corners of her mouth turn up but didn’t say anything.

I pull out my phone from my coat pocket and she gives me the side-eye. “I don’t think you should be doing that.”

“I know,” I grumbled. “Could you please google the address on the notes app?”

She takes hold of my phone, scrolling through it for a while before furrowing her eyebrows. A moment passes and I realize she’s quiet. Too quiet. And then it hits me.

“Why were you looking at Steven Universe fan art?”

godfreakingdammit.

It was now my turn to chip at my green nail polish, unable to keep myself from exploding from the heat rising in my neck. She thinks I’m a weirdo. Perfect.

It takes me a good couple of seconds to recover and when I do, I give her a tight-lipped smile and lie, “That was my little brother. He loves the show.” It wasn't a complete lie. Charlie does love the show. I actually feel bad about watching the entire thing without him on the weekend since we always watch it together.

“Charlie knows what fan art is? Isn't he like eight?” her eyebrows knit together.

My eyebrows furrowed. “How did you know that?” How does she know his name? How does she know I have a brother?

For a fraction of a second, I notice her eyes widen before going blank as usual. “It was on the sheet of information about you that the office gave me when I asked for your locker combination.”

I nod. “Oh, that makes sense.” No, it doesn’t. Pretty sure that's illegal actually. But then again she is Rosalie Davis. She could get away with murder if she wanted to. Oh my God did she find out about my-

She clears her throat, looking back at my phone. “Turn right.”

I take the turn and say, “We should probably exchange numbers.”

“What?”

My eyes enlarge to the size of basketballs. “To keep in contact to work on the project! I’m guessing you don’t want to keep having to put notes in my locker,” I laughed. “People might think we’re a couple or something ha.” Ha?

Ha?

“Right. Of course. That would suck.”

“Yeah...you know, ‘cause you’re dati-”

“Yeah, I know,” she snapped. Calm down bro.

She rolls her eyes at the sight of my shocked face but puts her digits into my phone before giving it to me for me to put it in my pocket. She goes back to staring at the scenery outside her window.

We stayed driving in comfortable silence for a while. It was actually nice. Quite peaceful.

Then she changed the radio station and WAP by Cardi B started playing.

-------

An hour and a half later, (the half being that we had to stop because Rosalie wanted to buy freaking strawberries sandwiches. Yes, that’s a thing that exists), we had stopped in front of a tall gate guarding a three-story building with numerous windows. The first two stories were coated in cream paint while the third and the patterns surrounding the windows were a light red. The building also had a small roof in the middle that had a huge golden bell hanging off of it. A ton of crosses were standing next to or in front of the chimneys.

As we neared the gates, a white doorbell speaker stuck on a phone booth made a rough cracking noise. I rolled down my window and was about to press a button when a lady spoke “Who are you and what do you want?”

“I-I have an appointment,” I stuttered.

“Name?”

“L-Levi Scott.” Stop stuttering.

The speaker cut off and the gates flung open. I drove in, going around the bunch of bushes filled with flowers in the middle. Deciding to park in front of the main door, I take my key out and slouch on my seat, heaving a sigh.

I changed my mind. I don’t wanna go anymore.

No, I do.

Wait no, I don’t.

Ugh just do it.

Nike.

I sit up and look over at Rosalie who’s eyeing me weirdly. “You look like you don’t want to be here.”

I shrugged. “50/50.”

“I need a cigarette,” she sighed.

“Please don’t smoke in my car,” I groaned. The air freshener I bought smells so good she better not ruin it. Did she even notice? It smells really good. Like daisies and-

Levi, focus.

I took my phone and texted Ansel.

Me:

I’m panicking.

Lol.

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

Future bussy slayer (ansel) has sent you a photo

I burst out laughing. Rosalie raised an eyebrow in confusion. I gave her the phone, still laughing my ass off but her face stayed blank.

She looked at the phone, looked back at me, and just blinked.

Damn, tough crowd. I took my phone back.

Me:

Thanks but I’m still panicking. Ask me random questions to distract me.

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

What’s Rosalie doing?

Me:

Hold on

I look towards her and see her writing in her journal and peek over to take a closer look but she smacks my face away. I sit back down in my seat.

Me:

She’s just sitting there

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

What do you want her to do?

Me:

Idk...sit there?

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

No like what do u WANT her to do?

Me:

Idk man! What do u want me to want her to do?

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

Ugh nevermind

Me:

Ok.

Where r u?

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

On a date. With my husband :)

Me:

U mean Laron

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

That’s what I said.

Me:

Get help

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

No

Pics?

Me:

No

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

Future bussy slayer (ansel) has sent you a photo

Me:

He looks homeless

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

I’m so close to blocking you

Me:

Do it

I dare you

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

Future bussy slayer (ansel) has sent you photos (3)

U wish u had this.

Me:

What? Diabetes?

Why are u sending me pics of food u found on Pinterest?

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

Idek we’re at burger king. He’s never had burgers before

Me:

I told you you to throw the whole guy away

Future Bussy Slayer (Ansel):

lol. wish me luck :)

Me:

I hope he gets diarrhea :)

Seen 2:37 pm

After five minutes of just sitting there waiting for a reply, I gave up.

“So are we gonna go in or not?” Rosalie asked. Her journal was back in her bag and she looked impatient. Now I feel bad. I put my phone back in my pocket and gave her the most charming smile I could muster. “Yeah.”

I got out of the car and was about to open Rosalie’s for her but she opened it herself, just barely missing hitting my foot and crushing my desires to be a gentleman for the first time in my life. I have to stop embarrassing myself. Like right now.

We walked side by side in silence until we reached the huge wooden doors. I sucked in a breath and waited as they slowly flung open.

It’s now or never.

Kinda wish it was never but here we are.

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Crestview High Official Website:

News Whisperer:

News whisperer has uploaded a photo

Hey there Crestviewers, News Whisperer here, your one and only source of info on Crestview's scandalous student body. As you probably already know I usually refrain from writing about Rosalie Davis but my job is to provide you all with facts and that’s what I intend on doing.

Even if it costs me my life.

One of my many followers has sent me the lovely photo you see above of our favorite anti-social goth and a certain tall handsome platinum-haired boy.

First Brandon, no R? Trying to fit in with the elites? Can’t blame you though I should warn you. Careful Platinum L, you could have a tremendous fall and I don’t think you’ll have anyone of significance there to help you get back up.

Oh and Ansel Abbott, I don’t think Laron’s as into you as you think but...that’s a post for another day.

Kindly stay out of trouble unlike your proclaimed ‘leaders’ as you await my next post.

Bye!

435 likes. 897 comments. 322 shares. +++

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