Faith

"Dada! Wake up!" I felt my senses woke up by the sudden voice calling me. My son really loves to wake up early.

"...When you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while," I suddenly heard him singing Just The Way You Are.

It's my favorite song and I used to sing this song to make him fall asleep.

I didn't open my eyes and pretended to sleep.

I can't help but giggle secretly when I heard him sigh after jumping on the bed several times. It's like he gave up already. Then it became silent.

Still, I didn't open my eyes and waited for him.

"D-Dada, I can't... can't breathe! Dada, wake up!" As soon as I heard that, I swear I was the fastest to turn around and look for him.

My heart was beating so fast as I run towards his place. He was holding his chest tightly and he was struggling.

"Baby! Baby, are you okay? Mild! Mild! Where's Deimos' inhaler? Help! Mild!" I began to shout as loud as I can. Worried that something bad might happen.

"Baby, hold on, okay? I got you!" Thousand of, "what if's" came to me.

What if it'll happen again?

What if he ran out of breath? So on and so forth.

"Gotcha, Dada!"

I felt out when I heard the jolly voice of my son.

I felt him embracing my leg while giggling like what he did was the best way to wake me up.

"Gulf, what happened? Why were you shouting?" Mild came in holding an inhaler in the right hand and a pan in the left. "I was about to cook when I heard you. Baby Deim! Are you okay? What happened?"

I've forgotten to breathe after realizing what happened.

I slumped on the floor when I lost all my energy. I felt my knees weakened as I saw Deimos still standing.

After regaining my senses, I examined if he was hurt or was he injured.

When I did an over-all check-up and made sure that he's fine, I let out a deep sigh.

"Deim. You know that I hate pranks, right? And you know that of all the things I dislike is to see you hurting. Do you understand me?" I said to him calmly.

I didn't want to shout at him. Neither I can't be mad nor I can't hit him. I just embraced him.

"Sorry, Dada. I just don't know how to wake you up. Stop crying, please. I'm sorry." He said that while caressing my cheeks and wiped my tears.

I can sense that if I didn't stop crying, he would cry too. He hates it when someone is sad or someone is crying, he's quickly affected.

After a couple of seconds, I stopped crying and I smiled at him. "Dada won't cry na. Don't do that again, okay? Say sorry to Uncle Mild too. Look! He's holding a pan, worried that something bad happened to you, he accidentally brought it with him."

"Sorry, Uncle Mild." He said with an apologetic look and hugged his Uncle too.

We all went out of the room and what I saw when I came out of the room shook me.

In the living room, it looks like the house has been robbed badly. Deim's toys, Mild's things, and pillows were all scattered!

"I'm sorry! I panicked, I thought something bad happened to the both of you so I hurriedly look for Deim's inhaler." Mild said and he was like a cat on a hot tin roof.

I let out a laugh and while he was back at cooking, I fixed the things that were scattered.

After cleaning it, we were just waiting for Mild.

I still can't believe that my son just pranked me and I didn't know how to react properly.

I've always been uneasy whenever he's having an asthma attack.

It scares me and it makes me remember what happened in the past.

Two weeks.

Two weeks had passed when Deimos happened.

I- I can't seem to process what just happened for the past two weeks.

When he came, I don't even know his name. How old he is, when was his birthday and all that. I don't have any idea about infants.

I've never taken care of a baby because I've never had a baby.

My mom and Mild knew about him.

I called them after two days because I'm losing it and I'm not someone who can control his temper because he cries a lot, like a lot and I don't know how to soothe him.

It's like I just woke up then someone was knocking on my door and whoosh! I have a child. I can't even process the information I got.

Other than that, it was really hard because I don't know how to change his diaper, how to bathe him, how to feed him.

For the first week, I almost gave him to an orphanage I know. Good thing my mom was there to stop me. She said that we can't give him because he is important and he deserves to know his real parent.

I don't have any money to hire a babysitter because, at that time, I lost my first job. So, I had no choice but to tell them.

My mom has been here in my condo for days already.

"Gulf! Son! Come here, quick!" I rushed to our room when I heard my mother.

"Ma, what happened? Are you okay?" I quickly asked when I saw her anxious face. My gaze went to the baby she was holding.

"Son, can we bring him to the hospital? He's not in a good condition!" Mama said and I saw her panic. I hurriedly went to get my car key.

I didn't know how fast we went but the good thing is we're here. I am nervous as hell! I saw how fast the doctors went and put all those apparatus on the baby.

"Ma, what happened? Why is he sick all of a sudden?" I asked my mom because I have no idea of what's happening.

"Since the day he came to us, he's pale already. His breathing is not normal, too. At first, I thought it was because he needs Vitamin D. So every morning, I take him out to see the sun, so that he'd get enough vitamin. I've been wanting to tell you but I didn't have the chance, you were always out of your senses. The other day, you went home drunk. Most of the days, you're late and tired as soon as you arrive home so I didn't get the chance to tell you. Today was just my luck because you're at home while he's experiencing that I'm sorry, son." Mom explained.

I was blaming myself for what I heard. I've been careless!

"Uhm, who's the parent?" I heard the doctor asked so I stood up in an instant.

"I'm the parent."

"Good morning, Misis and - ?" Said the doctor and looked at me.

"Gulf."

"Sir Gulf, is there someone smoking at home?" The doctor asked and I said no instantly. No one is smoking at home, so why is he asking?

"If that's the case, then does your family experience asthma attacks?" He asked once again.

"No, Doc. How is he? Is he okay already?" I asked.

"Well, I found out that he's experiencing a severe asthma attack so I had to give him quick treatment and it's a good thing that you brought him earlier. Also, his hemoglobin doesn't satisfy the normal rate of hemoglobin for infants. He needs a lot of vitamins. How old is he?"

That caught me off guard.

I don't know.

"Doc, the patient in room 105 is looking for you," Our gaze went to face the nurse that called the Doctor's attention. The doctor nodded and faced us.

"Looks like I need to go. Anyways, don't worry, he's in manageable condition now since it's been prevented. You can visit him and if the attack happens again, we'll have to confine him. I'll come back after an hour to check him up again. If there's any problem, you can ask for the assistance of the nurse I assigned in your room." He said and left.

Asthma.

"Son, is it possible that he inherited it from his father?"

Yeah, it is possible but,

"Why does he have to experience that? His mother is not even taking care of her!" I halted in distress.