Life before

One moment everything was perfect, and the next thing, you get sucked into a life you never knew to exist.

Its both excited and scary at the same time! So here goes my story about a girl who never knew she could be loved by someone she didn't even know existed half her life.

It was a typical summer's day in Florida I was standing in my old room packed full of boxes. All the memories of my family tucked away in one small room. The room is gray of all the memories this households. It was once my safe place, happy place but now all it reminds me of is loosing my brother. My Mother and father died when I was only eight years old. The police could never have solved the case of my parents death. My brother had to look after me up until two weeks back, when he died of cancer and I have to move across the country and start a whole new life with my aunt Susan.

The room is full of boxes, all my memories tucked away. Tears came out of my dark blue eyes and roll down my cheeks, My light blond hair shinning with the sun reflecting on it through the window. A swelling heart and tears of sadness and rapture all over my face.

"You ready" aunt Susan shouts from down stairs. Aunt Susan stayed for a while after the funeral of my brother, to help me take care of selling the house and getting everything ready for my move to Portland.

"Yes, almost finished" I removed the smashed from underneath my eyes and tape the box. I looked at my room one more time before I head down stairs.

The drive is long, I stared out the window and aunt Susan is not talking. She turned the volume up of whatever song is playing on the radio, and for that I am glad, I love aunt Susan, but this day was way to long for me to have a normal conversation. A Few miles before we reach Portland aunt Susan finally asked me if I was ok.

" Yes I'm ok, I just need to get this day over with I answered aunt Susan. Aunt Susan kept quit again, not asking any more questions. I felt relieved. I cannot believe I had to move away from home. All my friends my mother and fathers friends, even my brothers friends I'm going to miss all of them. We were all one happy family. How will I ever fit in at a new school!

After a while of thinking how my new life would be, I fell a sleep.

Susan pulled her truck into the driveway. The sound of drizzling rain drops falling from the sky, the trees swinging from side to side, and the wind singing. When Susan stopped I opened my eyes and for the first time in days, I had a smile on my face, taking in the beautiful sight of mountains and rain and snow everywhere in front of me.

Aunt Susan's house is small, a lot smaller than the house I grew up in, there is a porch with two white chairs and a big gray pot with red roses in. The grass is white, The snow was coming down in big heavy flakes. I took a few boxes of the trunk but kept staring at the small house.

" You like it Susan asked Yes, its small, it feels like I'm on holiday Susan laughed and grabbed a few boxes herself lets go inside before we freeze to death, I will ask Lucas to bring in the rest of the boxes" confusion took over my face who is Lucas? I asked looking at the boxes wouldn't you love to know" Susan laughed. I just rolled my eyes.

" You can take the bedroom upstairs on your left" Susan politely says o okay thank you" I answered a little confused. " You can go and unpack and settle in, I will make us supper"

I walk upstairs and notice The walls have so many pictures of my mother and Susan when they were little. In the middle of the stairs, up the wall there is a big photo frame with a picture of Susan, my mother and father, when they just graduated from college. Sadness took over, and I quickly looked away from the photo and went inside the bedroom.

The room is small, but not that small. There is a door that opens to a bathroom. The walls are painted light pink and has white cupboards. The night stand is old with pink roses on. I slipped my pajamas on and decided not to unpack tonight.

On my way downstairs aunt Susan sings a song my mother used to sing to me when I was little. I stopped in my tracks and listened how aunt Susan is singing the song the same way my mother used to sing it, tears started rolling down my cheeks again. I miss her so much. My mother was a beautiful woman. She had the same long blond hair like me, and her eyes were a little lighter than what mine is. She was never too tired to play with me, and I remember it like it was yesterday how she used to bake cupcakes and sing, you are my sunshine my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray. Now my skies are gray, and I don't have any sunshine in my life.

" You're done already" I sat down by the table

No, I will do it tomorrow, I need to eat and go to bed" Aunt Susan looked at me, a frown taking over her face" are you ready for tomorrow?" Susan asked concerned. " Will I ever be ready" I replied to her sticking a fork full of potatoes in my mouth. " I'm sure everything will work out, just give it some time and try not to think about it too much" Aunt Susan said to me while giving me a small smile.

After supper, I went upstairs, took a nice long shower, the heat of the water are burning my skin, but I stay inside a little longer, before Reality kicks in, and I remember that tomorrow is a new beginning, new school, new friends.

I can't believe my life took such a turn, will I fit in, how will I make new friends without my past life hanging like a cliff over my head.

The water turned cold, and That was my cue to snap out of my mood.

The next morning I dressed in dark blue jeans, a white fluffy jacket and a blue scarf. I brushed my hair and put it in a pony tale and curled just the ends of the pony tale. I decided on light make up. After staring at myself a few times in the mirror, I realized that I cannot put it off any longer I need to go.

Aunt Susan is waiting in the kitchen for me, with lunch money. " I didn't have time this morning to make some breakfast" Don't worry I grabbed an apple and ran for the bus.

The School is small, not a lot of students and the teachers are a lot more friendly here than what they were back at home, ..... not my home any more I said to my self-conscious .

While wandering down the hallway a girl with black hair and dark brown eyes bumped into me, it almost felt like the wind just knocked me on the floor. " Sorry, sorry. O gosh I'm so sorry, I didn't see you

" its ok I answered while the girl with the black hair helps me pick up my books. " I really am sorry, she stands up and stared right into my eyes, she blinked a few times and looked away. "I'm Lizzy I stuck out my hand to greet her, but she only smiled. " Ok then, I'm Miane" I said to her embarrassed That I stuck out my hand.

" You must be new here" Lizzy finally said after staring awkwardly at me yes just moved in"

two other girls walked up to us O hey guys, this is Celine and Zoe " " Lizzy introduced them. " They all seem a bit weird but hey you can't be picky on your first day can you?. " We're having a bonfire tonight at the beach you must come" Lizzy finally says after everyone gazed at Me like I was some kind of animal. " Yeah sure" I replied and instantly regret it.

" Ok then we will see you tonight?" Lizzy replied. I just nod and walked away. I can feel how they are looking at me from behind.

Back at the house aunt Susan is baking some muffins and I can smell the fresh coffee coming from the brewer.

As I walked into the front door she immediately turned to greet me.

" So how was your day" aunt Susan asked me with a big smile on her face, waiting for me to tell her everything. If I didn't know better I would say she was looking at the door every 5 minutes waiting for me to come home. I removed my shoes and my jacket and pour me a glass of water.

" It was ok, there was this girl that bumped into me in the hallway and then invited me to a bonfire tonight"

O that's nice" aunt Susan says with her voice a bit to high. " You think?, you don't think it's too soon? Like I know I have to make friends and all, but its seem a little too soon to just take life back as normal" Don't be silly" Aunt Susan replied grabbing me by the shoulders and made me sit by the table where she served delicious lunch. " I want to go, but I'm scared I will end up hating it and just go back to being sad and boring" aunt Susan raised her brow like a naughty girl boring, you are anything but boring, just go and have some fun. What's the worst that can happen?" Ok I will go" I answered, and she clapped her hands like a teenage girl. " Now eat your lunch and go get ready for your bonfire, she winks at me. I can't help but laugh at how silly she just sounded.

I went upstairs to get ready to go to the bonfire, which I now regret agreeing too. Furthermore, I decided to wear a thick maroon jersey and gray pants and a scarf, and maybe a hoody, Ne The woody is too much, I tossed it aside. I look in the mirror, and breathed in and out. I switch off my conscience that keeps reminding me what a terrible idea it is and that I should just put on my pajamas and grab a book and go to bed. I turned away from the mirror And went downstairs to say goodbye to aunt Susan. Aunt Susan was sitting on the couch with a book in her hands. " I'm leaving aunt Susan, will you be ok?" Aunt Susan stared at me underneath her silly glasses, she looks just like my mother when she does that.

" Yes, now go and have some fun, O and no boys!" She said pointing a finger at me. I just laughed goodbye Aunt Susan".

The ocean is beautiful. The sun is just about to set and the wind is singing. I saw Lizzy and a few other friends standing around just before I approach them. Lizzy is so beautiful, her choice of style is beyond me.

" Hi, you made it" Lizzy said with a big smile on her face. She introduced me to a few other friends. " This is Jade, micke, Jozell and my brother Riaan, and you've met Celine and Zoe at school. I greeted them all and notice that no one seems to be shaking hands here, wonder what's the deal with that. The black haired boy Jade kept staring at me, his brown eyes locked on me, I started to feel uncomfortable, I could feel the tension between us, his deep brown eyes glued on me. The deeper he stares, the more I get sucked away somewhere I don't even no exist. I can feel my heart beating faster, my hands started to shake and even in the cold I can feel my hands sweating, for a moment it only felt like the two of us.

Lizzy cleared her throat, and I snuck out of the moment and looked away. Jade kept on staring. "Jade?" Lizzy said a little harsh to gain his attention. " Are you coming?" Jade finally looked away from me yes, sorry" he said and started walking to the bonfire

"come lets go to the bonfire she politely says and dragged me to the bonfire. We all sat there playing citaar and singing. Jade sat across from me, I have never felt so uncomfortable in my life. Why does he keep on gazing at me? Do I look funny to him, I even started smelling myself to make sure I don't stink? I tried looking away a few times, but his eyes kept on dragging me back. Jade jumped up and walked towards the ocean. I can hear him mumble and cursing underneath his breath. Lizzy apologized and followed him.

I could see by their body language that they are having an argument.

What the hell were you thinking? Lizzy asked Jade I can't be here I need to get the fuck away from here. Jade answered Lizzy trying to gain control over his emotions "you can't go, everyone will notice.!! " How can you bring her here, She ..... before he could finish his sentence Jade saw me and took off. It kind of hurt seeing him leave not knowing if I said something or did something that made them argue.

" What's wrong, I asked Lizzy "don't worry about it" Lizzy answered while turning her back on me to walk away. I grabbed her arm to stop her, I notice how cold She is, colder than normal people. She jerked her arm away from me. " I know something is wrong, I saw the way he looked at me, are you guys together or something? Are you pissed at him?" "No, no were not together! "He wasn't feeling well and went home! Lizzy walked back to the bonfire. I knew something was up, but decided to let it go for now. After we all had a nice night at the bonfire I went home. Aunt Susan was waiting up for me. Sitting at the counter in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, reading a book. How was your night" Susan Asked it was ok. Not as bad as I thought it's going to be. " See I told you" I paused for a moment and though about what happened with Jade. " There was this one boy that was kind of weird he kept staring at me, and later he took of saying he wasn't feeling well" aunt Susan smiled maybe he likes you" don't be silly aunt Susan" I said quickly before she drags it out and go on about how boys are and. I grabbed a cookie of the counter and ran upstairs. I can hear her laugh while running upstairs. After I changed into pajamas and removed my makeup. I turned to the window to close the curtains. I nearly had a heart attack. Jade standing on the other side of the road looking at my window. I blinked a few times, and he was gone. No I must have imagined it, why would he come to my house? Dammit I need some sleep, this day was way too long and all the tension from earlier are making me seeing things now, or seeing him, my conscience said.

Was it really him? " Was the tension so high between us that I am imagining him now?" I sat for a moment on the edge of the bed trying to figure out what just happened. After a few moments of silence I decided to get into bed. I pulled the blanked on top of me. When I turned to switch off the light I looked at a picture of my parents sitting on the side table. They were so perfect, they looked so happy, why did this happen? And why can no one get answers. My mind switched back to Jade the tall dark haired boy that can do magic with his eyes by just looking at it. " Ok, I said to myself, stop dreaming" I switch off the light.

The next morning I woke up with the smell of coffee, I try to get myself out of bed after a whole night of toss and turning. Jades face is still haunting me, the way his deep dark brown eyes looked right through me, it felt like he could read my mind. I decided to get out of bed before I go crazy. I slipped on my slippers and put my messy hair in a pony tale. Furthermore, I can hear aunt Susan downstairs singing. I wish I can be a morning person like Aunt Susan. My mother used to drive us crazy. Singing and before the sun even came up, she would burst into our rooms and open the curtains. I remember how she would tickle me to wake up, and my father already made breakfast and my brother moaning from his room to keep it quiet. I smiled at the though of all the memories.

" Good morning Susan greeted good morning" I poured myself some coffee and looked out the window to the house across the road where I think I saw Jade

" Who is staying across the road I asked aunt Susan who looked surprised by my question. " No one for years now, why?, "no nothing just asking"

I finished my coffee, my mind still playing tricks on me. " O shit look at the time I'm going to be late" aunt Susan flipped me of with a smile your language madam" I just smiled and ran upstairs to get dressed. Today I will skip the makeup, my hair is a mess, a beanie will have to do. A grabbed my jacket and ran out the front door.

I jumped on the bus and the only chair that is open is next to a girl who clearly doesn't want me to sit next to her. So I decided to just stand. Last night played over and over in my head, he is so beautiful but way to dramatic as well. I need to ask Lizzy what's up with him, I know it probably has nothing to do with me, but I could feel every bit of tension between us, and I know it's probably in my head, but I know I saw him across the road from my house last night, I couldn't have imagined it. He was staring right at me, but then again it doesn't explain how he just vanished the moment I closed my eyes and opened it again. Maybe I should just let it go, I won't gain anything out of the obsession.

Lizzy was waiting for me when the bus dropped us off. She smiled and greeted me Good morning"

You need to tell me what is wrong with Jade" I asked, and I could kick myself, I just decided moments ago that I'm going to let it go, and here I sound like a crazy person. " What do you mean? You know exactly what I mean" I said to Lizzy hoping that she won't feel offended by the way I'm coming down on her. "No I don't! "You need to drop this Miane" Lizzy walked away from me. "I saw him last night" Lizzy stopped, what do you mean you saw him" Lizzy asked me I saw him across the road at my house looking towards my window" Lizzy started laughing "you probably saw a ghost, please drop it Miane come lets go, were late for class".

While I was sitting in class I notice that Jade is not in class, I stared out the window not hearing a word professor Landon is saying. Was it really him? I tried to convince myself again that it was not, but I know what I saw, and that was not me imagining him. Why would he just took of like that yesterday, and why does Lizzy jump every time I'm mentioning his name"! After school, I said goodbye to my friends and went home.

I changed into comfy sweaters. I opened my window, my mind went back to last night where I thought I saw Jade standing across the road. I saw the tree and decided that it must have been what I saw. There and then I decided that I'm done playing mind games on myself, I decided to let it go. I don't know this boy, actually I'm glad I don't. He is full of himself. I went downstairs and made myself a cup of coffee and some leftovers of the muffins. I packed out my homework according to the subjects I have. Biology was fun today. The teacher was friendly, and he knows how to make a class feel comfortable. English was a disaster, but at least the homework is not that much, so I decided to start with English. I went back on my notes to make sure I didn't miss anything, and after I felt confident that my English is up to speed, I move on to the next subject. I made myself another cup of coffee and took the last muffin that was left from yesterday's lunch. Aunt Susan is still sleeping, it must be hard to work shifts especially at night. I love my sleep, I somehow want to follow in my mother and fathers footsteps to become a doctor or nurse, but the night shift is making me change my mind too often. At least there is still a whole year left before I have to make a decision what I want to do after school.

I started my biology.

I heard a knock on the door, I spilled my coffee all over the counter. Shit, shit I grabbed my books and grabbed a cloth to remove the coffee from the counter before it reach the floor. Aunt Susan is going to kill me, I used the White cloth instead of the dark cloth in the sink. I'm coming when someone knocked again. I still had a piece of muffin in my mouth. " Dammit" I threw my hands in the air and ran to the door. I opened the door and there he was, beautiful brown dark eyes, looking deep into my soul. "Jade" I whispered, clearly sounding like a teenage girl that has a huge crush. I tried to chew down the muffin as fast as I can "what are you doing here?"

" I heard that you asked what was wrong with me yesterday" yeah you just took off without saying goodbye" I replied. "Yes sorry for not saying goodbye I think I had a stomach bug or some shit, sorry if I scared you" Jade answered. I was surprised by the words he chose to respond with but ok "No worries!" I said not feeling convince. Jade looked at me waiting to say more Ok then I will leave you to whatever you were doing" Just as he walked away I asked if he wants to come inside, at first he smiled and then looked to the other side of the road, and declined my offer. "I will see you at school". He left leaving me wondering why he is so distanced. I closed the door, and aunt Susan came from the stairs asking me who it was, I looked confused! Jeez this boy is complicated what the hell. " Just some guy from school" I replied to her. Aunt Susan grabbed her purse from the side table and her jacket from the hook "ok then, I need to get to work will you be ok by yourself tonight" Susan asked, yes I'm just going to finish my homework take a nice bath and go to bed". "Ok see you later!" She gave me a thigh hug and left for work.

I started feeling very tired. After homework, I took a nice long shower and was ready for bed.